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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    For a woman who is more important in her life her husband or her parents?

    The below Sanskrit sloka tells that Husband is more important than anybody in woman's life ( after her marriage) the below Sanskrit poem tells regarding Sita and her attributes it is clearly mentioned in this poem

    Sri Rama pathni Janakasya putri sundara komlangi
    Bhugarbha jathah bhuvanika matha vadhu varabhyam vardha bhavantu

    the first line itself states that women will get recognized by her husband not by her father or mother (after marriage)that is why, to introduce Sita in the sloka Lord SRI Rama is Sita husband and after that it is mentioned she is a daughter of Janka maharaja ....Do you agree the woman will get recognized by her husband and she need to give first priority to her husband......
  • #572276
    There is a thread in active mode in the forum discussing the women's name containing their husband's name after marriage.
    As far as associating the identity of the women with the identity of their husband is concerned, that is an issue different than the issue of importance of the husband or parents in their life.
    Perhaps it will be very difficult to opine as to whether the husband or the parents are more important for a women. Ultimately only this much can be said that neither of the two are less important though they have different roles and responsibilities.
    I had raised one thread in the past inquiring as to whom an individual will choose, in case they have to choose only one of their parents or children. The outcome of the thread was that generally people will choose their children.
    Therefore in the current thread also, there is one more dimension i.e. children as far as discussing importance is concerned. That way perhaps for a mother , children will get precedence over either of husband and parents.

    Let us encourage each other in sharing knowledge.

  • #572288
    It is not right to compare the roles of husband and parents in the life of a woman. Until the marriage it was parents who brought her up to the stage of a woman. Their contribution in her life cannot be belittled. True that after marriage the role gets shared with husband. But still the girl gets several needful information from parents. And these pieces of information she carries to hand over to her children, because she has to act in the role of a mother (one of the parents).
    Gold Member ISC

  • #572293
    Well when you refer a Tamil proverb " Annaiyum Pithavum munnari Deviam" it clearly states that none is first than parents ie Mother and father. Even God comes after them. So for either daughter or son, parents cannot be negated and be termed as inconsequential. I do agree after the marriage the daughter gets the name of her husband after her name and she is recognized by her husband. But when comes to good name a daughter in law portrays in her husband's house, it is the parents who are appreciated particularly mother. If the mother nurtures the child well, she would behave and adjust with any one in inlaws house. So parents and husband has their own prominence in a daughter's life.
    K Mohan
    I consider myself as the learner everyday

  • #572374
    We are telling a country as mother land, telling a language of one as mother tongue, our country as Bharat Mathaa from such things it is clearly depicts the role of a women as she manifested with many roles. How many of us could watch the cooker sound or boiling milk on the stove in Kitchen, a mother /wife can only do this as she is simply watching them from sitting outside by cutting vegetables. To a mother of a child both husband and children are important. Like this to a married (newly) women both husband, his and her parents are important as two eyes to a human.

  • #572376
    The interpretation of the verse by the author is not correct.
    The verses do not convey any meaning as claimed by the author in his thread'. It does not tell that husband is more important than anybody in woman's life.
    The verse given in the thread just qualifies Sita with various attributes :: "Rama's wife, Janka's daughter, beautiful woman, born from Earth, Mother of the Universe .... let the bride and groom prosper." The Sanskrit verse quoted above says just that. It is a blessing verse.
    I think the author has jumped to his inference and conclusion because the 'Rama Patni'(wife of Rama) is given first.

    Let me explain with a very ground reality example. We write about some one as Mr.X, M.Tech. Does it mean that SSLC, or B.Tech are not important in a person's life and only M.Tech is important? We usually say the latest as first. Similarly in the given context, it is the newly married being blessed. So the latest additional attribute is she is married to Rama. But all the qualifications before or apart from marriage are also given there.

    From these please do not jump to say there is gender bias. It is only in our country that a man is also known or better known by his wife's name. Rama is better known as Sitaram or Janakiram.. Sitaram is not equivalent to Sita w/o of Ram but it means that Ram h/o of Sita. Please compare this to present day names of married women with the name of husband as suffix, and not vice versa.

    Let us keep faith on ourselves and work sincerely, not leave everything to fate.

  • #572378
    A woman has to perform several roles in her life. First as a daughter, then as a wife, and later a mother. After marriage her role as a daughter get completes and wife role begins, which she has to give first priority. She is everything for her husband. They've taken oath to live as a lifelong partner of each other. Their value in relationship stays high in front of any other relatives.
    In each and every aspect and situation they must handle and take care of them and their family. Once they became parent of a child, their responsibilities and burden increases. Their parents are also part of their family, however they should understand the value of their children as first. They need to fulfill everything, each & every demands of their children. Even thought nowadays, parents too understand the importance of their children as they passed with the same situation in their life.

    Naresh Kumar
    'Every bad situation will have something positive. Even a dead clock shows correct time twice a day.'

  • #572383
    #572376 I studied little bit of Sanskrit in my school days so please do not underestimate the others caliber as I know what the poem conveys. I am not intelligent man like you and my age is just only 35 years and I respect you as my elder brother coming to the point for a real time example if you applied for a job the desired qualification is M.Tech but the Job seeker done B.Tech degree then your graduation will not serve the purpose or won't fulfill the need. similarly even though B.Tech is the desired qualification for the job but the highest preference will given to M.Tech students then.......
    If you ask your doubt you are fool for 5 minutes but if you don't you are fool forever -- Chinese proverb

  • #572403
    One more thing is the goddesses Lakshmi (the richest woman) will always press the feet of Vishnumurthy(her husband). The rivers of Ganga,Yamuna,Saraswati (Triveni sanghamam) will finally mix in ocean or sea that we called as samudram(which is a male term i.e.ocean god).
    If you ask your doubt you are fool for 5 minutes but if you don't you are fool forever -- Chinese proverb

  • #572416
    Both parents & husband plays an important part of a women's life. There shouldn't be any comparison in priorities because situations differs. But a women is good in her responsibilities & she never gives up.

  • #572438
    Each relationship holds its own worth in every individual's life. Family ties are no different for women than they are for men. Parents, spouse, children and siblings are our closest family. We must strive to create a balance in how we manage each relationship. The sex we are born in does not change how we behave with our family. There are no positions (ranks) that we can place the people we love.

    Yes, your significant half gets more importance, but that is natural. God has created man and woman to be one, to leave their parents and live as one - to procreate. In that respect the spouse becomes important. However, it is circumstances that make us change our priorities.

    Children cannot and should not abandon their parents. They are morally bound to be their support system. A man cannot expect his wife to be with him and break all ties with her birth family, because of his understanding of the scriptures.

    The relationship between a husband and wife should be one of understanding - with both partners understanding the commitment the other has, towards their respective parents. The thought that the male is all-important (in the marriage) and parents are second best, is incorrect. A marriage where such notions exist in the husband's head is either one of compromise (from the woman's perspective) or doomed.

    A fool will always try to make sense of his nonsense!

  • #572442
    I have a doubt. Who will be important in a man's life after his marriage, his wife or his parents? If I am not wrong, parents have the same meaning and value for children irrespective of their sex.
    Knowledge is knowing tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in fruit salad - Miles Kington.

  • #572475
    #572442 For Male (Husband) it is the responsibility to look after their parents as Ganesh is your name Ganesha or Vinayaka god you know what he did he revolve around his father and mother for many times and successful reaching goal that is why to perform any pooja or good thing we need to pray first Ganesha or Vinayaka.....
    If you ask your doubt you are fool for 5 minutes but if you don't you are fool forever -- Chinese proverb

  • #572500
    Referring a woman through her husband (as mentioned in the sloka) is just a reference which means giving preference/importance to Lord Rama than to King Janaka. In suprapatham it starts like 'kausalya supraja..." here kausaly is said rather than Dasaratha, we should not take otherwise. Similarly the reference to be made through a known person. In many places of Pooja and Bhajan/Parayanams many people identified me as 'husband of Mythili madam' this means they can understand only through her. Seeking importance among parents, husband, wife ,mother-in-law etc., my view is all are important to all as the relatives are created by God. To a lady as I told earlier, both husband and parents are to be treated as both eyes.

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