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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Why generally it takes many years in finding a suitable match in matrimonial alliances?

    Generally, it takes many years in finding a suitable match for the individuals. Nowadays it is common to find many individuals crossing 30 or even 35 years of age who are still searching for their soulmates even after getting gainful employment.
    It is a sociological issue worth discussion. Earlier there was even the malpractice of child marriages which has been eradicated up to a large extent by enacting laws and consistent efforts of the many individuals and organizations.
    I think one of the reasons of such a scenario is the fact that people are not ready to come to the terms that there is nothing like an ideal individual and compromises/adjustments are invariably required on certain counts in all cases.
    What are your observations regarding the subject matter?
  • #573280
    Searching a perfect bride or bridegroom is a difficult task for most of the parents. Some parents are very straight in this matter and they allow their children to choose their life partner and for marriage; which is very difficult in joint families. They're searching bride according to their status, culture, tradition, etc. so that the girl will accommodate with them and come across with their philosophy very easily. In search of good bride or bridegroom the children may losses their adolescence. And the late marriages are quite not fruitful in case of understanding among the couple and fruitfulness.
    Many parents are busy in their profession and do linger thinking about their children education, job or getting into a good profession, etc. Many parents' lost the chance of getting perfect candidate due to the imperfect timing of their children.

    Naresh Kumar
    'Every bad situation will have something positive. Even a dead clock shows correct time twice a day.'

  • #573352
    There are different reasons and factors which forces the parents to wait and then perform marriage at the behest of their child. Normally those who are well educated and started earning good salary wants to be with the parents as they enjoy all the royal treatment of getting up late, going to parties and entertaining friends. But when they get married surely the family responsibility stares at them and they slowly resign from the active life enjoyment. I have seen many relatives who are able earners are taking to their family first and then partying. So in this process the marriages are getting delayed due to non availability of matching partner. One of my friend son who is well qualified and earning has even tested his hormone and got certified from the doctor that he can bear a child. Because some grooms feel that they would be blamed for no child issue and that will turn to big fighting reason for every one.
    K Mohan
    I consider myself as the learner everyday

  • #573358
    Selection process in employment scenario is commonly inviting applications through an advertisement, screening the applications to suit to our requirement, filtering the applications suitable according to our company policy,salary affordable, expected qualifications, nearness to the factory/office etc.,Then call for interview and in interview we assess the candidate for the employment and we offer the order of appointment. But as for as matrimonial scenario, many people in the advertisement itself filtering the candidates by specifying the requirement such as employed in MNC with lakhs salary, no parents should alive, own house should possess. So, the advertisement scanning itself a big job. So, the delay. But normally there is a saying that the marriage is thousand years matter (Kalyanam aayiram kaalaththu payir). In those days the parents of bride and bridegroom were doing selection process but now the bride and bridegroom are in the selection process with much stipulations. So, why the delay. But it is clear in one thing that the selection process with conditions by parents are only on the wellness of the couple but they think that this is for their convenience.

  • #573366
    Parents need no be blamed all time. Many cases now are delayed or no alliance takes place because of the adamncy and non-flexible attitude of the children.

    The adamanacy and no-compromise stand vary from person to person.

    Parent sometimes advise and suggest flexibility and pragmatic approach, but children stick to their demands. I had a girl in my relative family who was insisting on a boy with own house, postgraduate qualification and particular job only at a particular place. While all other parameters may be met, a demand for own house for a boy of below thirty may not be so realistic.

    Partners should be such that they complement and supplement each other for their co-existing life ahead. Marriage alliance should not be approached like job recruitment or for a business partnership on watertight standards.

    Let us keep faith on ourselves and work sincerely, not leave everything to fate.

  • #573368
    In India, divorce and separation are still frowned upon. For the sake of peaceful conjugal life of sons and daughters, parents try their best to pre-judge the families of the prospective partners. So, it becomes a time-consuming process.
    “Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.” - Paul Terry

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