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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Changed attitude in women these days

    In today's generation, both men and women are equal and independent. Yet a tradition is followed were a girl is married to a man and stays in his house along with the elders and the man's parents. It is always nice to spend life in the presence of elders. But these days there are many girls whose attitude is changing were they tell their husbands that they should live seperately in a house without her in-laws. Even if the in-laws are very good and give all the freedom to the girl were she does everything as per her wish, she still demands to live seperately.
    What could be the reason for this attitude? When a girl is allowed to meet her parents and stay with them when ever she wants then why does she try to seperate her husband from his parents?
  • #594867
    When marriages are arranged by the parents from both sides, it is expressly understood that when ever occasion comes the bride has the freedom visit her parents, relatives and even friends house without restrictions. But after the marriage the in laws frame new laws that during festivities and occasions the bride must be present in their house and do all rituals as they have the first right. But the girl wont relent. She has spent so many years at the parents place and she would be longing to go and celebrate the occasion. Here comes the dispute and thus parting ways starts. Though in some houses the in laws do agree to send the bride after performing functions or rituals at their home first which the girl wont like. This is the main reasons some new brides wants to discard the in laws once for all and live separately.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #594903
    Surprise to see such thread posted by a female and I appreciate the author for such bold question.
    Coming to your point, it is just not these days but it happening since long. There are many reason for it. In our country it is mostly seen that once a girl gets married, she has to take all the responsibilities in In-law house. Which I personally fee is not fare enough. A person who is so new and had to adjust in new family should be given enough time before given the many such responsibilities she may never did it. Sometimes, the big family too become problem to adjust. If a girl married to a big family, everyone would expect her to be supportive, it is very difficult to make everyone happy. If she oppose, she might be tagged with so many "names". Above all the relationship with mother-in-law is a world known fact. Rarely, we see the happy and good relationship between them.
    I am sure, no woman would like to get separate with her own family but there is a limit for anything. Till it is adjusted with everyone, she stay with family and when the responsibilities become torture, she has no other option but to leave the family and stay separate.

    In one way it is better for a man to keep distance with any war in which he can not take any side. It gives a less stress to a man who work so hard and take everyday tension to fulfil his responsibilities. I find no issue if a girl stay away from her in-law but take care them with little distance.

  • #594907
    Earlier days united families are there. All brothers are staying together even after marriage also. They all used to spend times together. Because of the over population family planning concept has started. Slowly we two,our one concept has come. So these days either boys or girls are accustomed to stay alone. This may be one of the reasons ladies want to stay separately.
    This again depends on the nature and the way she has brought up by her parents. Now a days parents in law are treating their daughter in law as their daughter only. All freedom is given. If not given also they can grab it through her husband. This may not be a issue for getting separated.

    When you are living together even lot of freedom is given also, every one of the family should adjust some where to get on well. This may not be liked by the ladies who want to live alone so that they can live the way they wanted.

    always confident

  • #594929
    Accept or deny but these could be reasons that women don't prefer to stay along with in laws.
    1. Unwillingness to do domestic chores of in laws along with husband. Most think they even did not cook in parents home why should to cook for in laws and clean all dishes and cloths.
    2. Freedom of roaming freely in house with preferred choice of cloths. There are hardly lower middle class women left who wears sari all the time in home and out. Most in laws still are open minded and respect choice of daughter in law, women thinks it should be more freedom and not even single pin point on wearing in house.
    3. Choice of shopping makes women uncomfortable to talk in front of in laws. Since parents think of saving more than spending.
    4. Women wanted to decorate house by their way which might conflict with in laws thinking.

    Life Is Beautiful

  • #594974
    Yes,there is a change in attitude of women these days.Women of these days are being more and more independent .
    They don't like interference s of their in -laws in their own matters.They are being dominating in nature.They want to live independently with their husbands,where their parents come.They do n't want to live with their in-laws.They feel comfortable with their parents.But don't feel comfortable with their in-laws.The girls' families involve too much
    in girls' families matter.

    Service to mankind is service to God.

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