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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Do you visit your friends and relatives with prior intimation or in a casual way?

    Generally during holidays, we have our fixed programmes and would be attending some important jobs that can't be managed during regular days. Any disturbance during holiday would change the complexion of the game of the day. Sometimes we may be planning to visit our friends or relatives and might have intimated about it to them so that they would also rearrange their [plan accordingly. However, it may so happen that your near and dear may visit you suddenly and you can't avoid your presence. Also you can't say them that you should have come with prior information as it would be a delicate issue. You can't help it except informing the other party who were waiting for you.

    This type of casual approach with some of us will have a circular impact on others' programmes also. So, it is always ideal to keep informed of your visit much before your arrival there except in extraordinary circumstances. What do you say?
  • #597924
    In our country whether it is due to our inherent culture or tradition we do not inform our friends or relatives that we are going to their places. This is true specially for local visits.

    For outstations because we are afraid where we will go if they are not there so we inform prior to our journey.

    I remember one incident when we went to sleep at 10 PM and at around 10:30 PM the door bell rang. One of my colleague with his wife and baby was there. I did not open the door and remained silent but they continuously pressed the bell until I welcomed them. They were seeing the pitch dark in our house and knew that we have gone to sleep but stayed at the door with hopes. As they entered the house and settled in drawing room their first query was - 'do you go to sleep early? '

    Anyway now things are slowly changing and people are trying to inform each other regarding their visit.

    Knowledge is power.

  • #597927
    I normally visit my relatives houses or friends houses casually and since I have relatives and friends in such a way not mistaking on casual visit and hate visit with prior appointment. If the relative or friends expecting prior appointment, they are not real relative or friend. It is our culture for expecting guests or people in such a way only but the western culture is expecting appointment. We should never give up the culture of our own. If anybody came to know that that they are expecting appointment I just give up them from my list, totally. I am also ready for hosting the others without any appointment at any time. Once I and my wife proceeding to coimbatore, when we were waiting in the chennai central platform for the arrival of train, one couple,stood nearby us were talking that to take tiffin in the hotel in order to avoid disturbance to the house persons where they are going(later came to know that they are going to house of their son).I just told my wife that,'for this they would have preferred to stay in hotel'. On reaching the compartment, we found that the couple were near to our seat only. But that person realized us as seen in the platform, told me that 'I heard your comment on our dinner in hotel,but later only i really felt sorry for thinking so'. I told him,'If you are thinking your son as alien, thenwhat the love you can expect from him'.

  • #597929
    I usually/prefer to stay at home during holidays and don't prefer going out to meet relatives. But when occasion demands then I would move out and first I would find out if they are available at home. I dont' want to cause inconvenience for them. When guests come to our house it's difficult to tell them that you have work and need to go out. It doesn't look nice to allow them at home and we go out. They may think otherwise, and also they may not be in a situation to use the things comfortably as their home. They may not be able to handle things in our homes as we are accustomed to using them and they may not know the tricks that we use for proper functioning of gadgets. For example switch on and off of TV, lighting gas, operating mixi , using ingredients for cooking etc. These kind of incidences are sometimes clumsy but we need to handle it properly

  • #597945
    I feel it is always better to inform the friends and relatives in advance our plan to visit them. There is nothing wrong in informing before going. Basing on our time, they may plan their programme or they may tell us that they have other plans.

    If we go without informing, we are not sure they will be available. Our trip will become a waste. If they are there, but they have different plan, unnecessarily they suffer.

    Yesterday One of my friend came to my house to invite me for his son's marriage. In general for such occasions t hosts will plan as per their convenience . It is very difficult
    to inform and go. But my friend gave me a SMS saying that he will come to my house in the
    morning. I replied. Ok. He came and invited me and gone. I felt very happy for his planning.

    If we are going to our very near and dear relatives like brother's house or sister's house sometimes we may skip informing. I always make it a point to inform and go.

    always confident

  • #597946
    Close friends and close relatives need not be taken appointment and then visited by us. By close we mean , we have the liberty to disturb them even in odd hours and they are bound to receive us with good hospitality. One my close friend in Delhi suddenly came to our house on a job assignment and had to stay for two days. I obliged for his sudden visit and good hospitality. Like wise when I had been to Cuddalore to visit my sister in law house it was 11.30 pm as the bus reached late and they are put to lots of inconvenience and being our first visit to their house, they are bound to give us fitting reception even at that odd hours. By the time we took the dinner it was 2 am and that was unforgettable day. I was really annoyed over inordinate delay of the bus from Chennai which was failed en route. We want to give them surprise with our visit, but we seems to have annoyed them.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

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