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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    When we accept others appreciation in silence, then why we burst on criticism by some ?

    We have been habituated to live in the pampering world right from the beginning and we are not accustomed to the valid and even constructive criticism. While we accept the appreciation and applauds in silence and some times with greater acknowledgement , we seldom keep quiet and burst into tears or angry reactions whenever some one makes rave remarks or criticize our behavior. We must inculcate the habit of accepting the criticism also because, all appreciation and no criticism wont pave way for our developments. We must know our draw backs and hence constructive criticism should be welcomed and we have to mend ways,
  • #609198
    We must develop the ability to distinguish between sincere criticism and criticism out of jealousy. Sincere criticism can help us to improve. Criticism out of jealousy can cause our downfall if we pay heed to such criticism. We must remain unaffected to such criticism. But it requires control over our mind.
    Caution: Explosive. Handle with care.

  • #609201
    Most of the people against us would stoop to the level of jealous criticism and we have to know their ulterior motives on it and take it light.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #609217
    Well said Sir, if any one has a growing up kid, they would release that a pat on their back gives you a smile, a stern lecture on mistakes makes you listen to there angry back answers ( you always find fault with me, you don't like me etc)

    I think its partly the way we are brought up, the way the family and friends behave and interact with a child, the individuals personality and emotional make-up. We live in a world where in everybody is rushed off their feet, there's no time for little gestures like - well done, thank you for your timely action, thanks for getting that order, etc. Slowly criticism and negative remarks are more often being used at competitive work environment and even social environment; and sadly true appreciation is less often used.

    The other issue with criticism is how is it presented, whether is serves the purpose and is it Constructive. Many a time under the guise of feedback or honest criticism people hurt other's sentiment and at times their career progression.

    Yes, we all have to learn every day in life and the best teacher for us is a honest critic. I would say listen to the criticism, analyse it, if it helps you to realize your mistakes then you've learnt from it. If you feel its biased or too personal or out of jealousy and malice, just ignore it and move on for Life is too short to be surrounded by negativism of people around you. Finding people with a good heart may be difficult but once we've found them its important to keep them around us.

  • #609228
    As has been said in the above responses, criticisms are of two types; one is the real or constructive criticism that is made to amend some of our flaws which need to be taken with the right spirits and the other one is criticism made out of jealousy which is really hard to digest.
    We should be able to differentiate between the two and take the constructive criticisms with open heart while the criticisms made out of jealousy and malice, just ignore it and move on without bothering for and paying any heed to it.
    However, it needs proper control over our mind and a sense of prudent justification to understand the differences.

    I have promises to keep and miles to go before I sleep.

  • #609234
    We should accept genuine criticism also like appreciation. If, The people who are genuine in their analysis and telling you that you are erring, we should take it very openly and see that we will get it corrected. Then you will have more scope for your progress. But we should be able to understand the person who is criticizing you. Some people who are jealous of your progress may try to put a break by unnecessarily criticize and try to divert your mind. You need not respond to those people. You can leave it to their wisdom only. When we walk on a road many dogs bark. If you start throwing stones at each such dog, your time will get wasted and you will not reach your destination in time.So we have to ignore and reach the destination in time. Similarly, we need not be always happy thinking about the applaud you got for your work. That is past. The Past will not help you in winning the present and future. Instead, a genuine criticism will help you mend your ways and ensure winning in present and future projects.
    drrao
    always confident

  • #609293
    I agree with what Natarajan said regarding the point on criticism. It is dependent upon how we grow throughout our life and how our parents treat us on every single happening. Some children carry the same pampering behaviour even when they grow up and there is the point that criticism becomes hard for them to digest and at the end, bursting.
    Criticism as everybody has described in this thread, is of two types : one that is for betterment and the other, that comes out of negativity and ignorance or jealousy. One needs to first understand what type of criticism it is, and then should behave. Bursting out suddenly out of aggression is no way to resolution of it. One needs to think calmly on the point and root cause for criticism, to make self better.

    A positive attitude will lead to positive results.

  • #609351
    Though we read well,recite Bhagavathar Gita, as a human being it is very difficult to neutralise our mind, but it is very much necessary .

  • #609361
    Sometimes even when it is constructive criticism we tend to lose our cool because the way the criticism is delivered hurts our ego so badly and we try all means to defend it.

    Some critics are not just out of jealousy but it comes out of anger as well. That may not be constructive or destructive. Sugar coated appreciation should also be rejected as they may destroy you along with destructive criticism.


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