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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Does caring too much make others emotionally weak?

    Caring is a great form of affection. We care for our loved ones, our family, the children, our parents. The love we receive from our parents has no comparisons. We care for people who are closed to our heart. Does this caring make the other person somehow weak? Weak in terms of making decisions independently. The person's maturity level comes down. They are not able to handle situations independently. If in a relationship, caring too much can make the other person follow the love in any way or they get addicted to it. People completely relate their life with that of the other person's existence. Is practicality lost when someone cares a lot?
    Caring is a state of mind, to think deeply. Caring makes people more emotional and they tend to rely on another person for their decisions.

    Affection is needed to live a happy life but with required freedom in hand. Caring should be up to a limited extent. It should not come up within the other person's personal space. Personal space to live their life their own way. Personal space to take the important decisions of life.
  • #612921
    Yes I agree with the author's notion that by caring too much we are not allowing the other to exercise their freedom and does make them to be weak. I have seen some children who are not accustomed to get exact change after purchasing Kirana or vegetables since the mother has not trained them. Children and our close associates must be exposed to the daily routines of life , so that they know everything about what is happening and also act according to the need. Otherwise they would turn to be weak and later lazy and that will lead to bad remarks and abuse from the others the way he was brought up.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #612939
    Yes I agree with the author because I have seen so many peoples who are cared too much by someone are becoming less courageous in their life and they also don't have any ability to choose what is correct and what is wrong and they are becoming more sensitive even they can bear any small change in their comforts.
    Especially caring too much also leads the someone to ruin their character,one example is that the people or children who cared too much don't respect others as others do. One of the most important thing is they don'y listen others and cannot consider others feeling,ideas and anything. they just feel happy in their world and some of them are very insane......

    " Everything has a boundary. so being in a boundary is good for every one".

    "Be cool and Stay focused".
    Shaik sohail.

  • #612941
    This is a well known fact especially when parents have a single child or in families wherein too much of love,affection and an overprotective approach makes them less prepared for survival in the outside world with emotional issues. Such children are often emotionally fragile in the outside world when they reach college or go into a hostel. Between parents and children, we need to be close yet far apart. Easier said than done. As the child grows he or she also needs some self time, interact with others to learn love, compassion from friends and older kids or adults. They also need some independency and freedom to think, to do and explore solutions and options.

    I'm not sure how much this applies to siblings and older adults, maybe to a certain extent this is also contributing the the issues that arise in most families like too much attention given to a child/mother rather than the spouse, change see in mothers after their affectionate daughters leave home after marriage.

    If you see in western culture, to moment children reach college age, they move outside their homes, even if they stay they pay rent many times. College students often handle their own educational loan and senior citizens often take pride in being independent ( it's not that they don't have love and affection between parents and children)

  • #612972
    I agree with the author. Too much caring can spoil anyone. When we have someone to care about us, do everything for us, we become lazy and will not learn to live on our own. Children should be taught to stand on their own while we care for them. They should be taught to tackle various situations themselves. My dad was very caring and he will not let me go anywhere alone and he always had this habit of dropping me and picking me. During school days, it was full time school bus. So I never had a chance to travel alone and I was least bothered about it as I was becoming too dependent. I had to travel alone when I got my first job. That was the difficult time for me. Even though my dad took me to the place in the public bus and showed me where to get down and all, I was bit scared. So was he. But later I learned and now I have no issues travelling alone to the places I know. Even my father has confidence in me now. If I was let to travel alone earlier, I would have learned it earlier also I wouldn't have enjoyed the cozy of being picked up and dropped. I will not blame my dad, because I know he cared for us as he was worried about us and he loved us so much. But as parents we should have little more courage and let our kids learn things to help them grow stronger and independent.
    Regards
    Chitra
    "Do not give up, things might not favour you always"

  • #612989
    It is 100% true. Caring too much is not good for the children. They will become very lazy and they start depending on you for everything. All parents will love their children. They will take care of them in all respects and see that they are happy. In this process what is happening is the children are getting spoiled. The child asks for the monkey on the hill, they parents are trying to give them. So they are not understanding the difficulties in life. In this respect, parents should teach how to live. They should allow them to fly with their wings. Then only they will flourish. I always say the government should not give free food to people but it should create facilities and show a path to earn. In the same way, the parents should teach his children how to face the odds and how to be self-sustained. Today parents are here and the children are happy. But tomorrow something happens to the parents the children should not suffer. So parents should always support them and allow to swim on their own so that they will become strong.
    drrao
    always confident

  • #612995
    Caring too much for other's in this case (kids) can make them emotionally dependent and they might get molded in that way which will make them difficult to survive and fight the battles when they grow up. It will be hard for them to come out of and it can cause many issues in their life personally.

    Again, when it comes to showing care to grown-up people they might not be weak but when we care for them more emotionally we can become weak and emotionally bound to that person due to our caring nature. I have seen many cases where due to this nature, they get hurt so deeply because the other person is not so caring and doesn't reciprocate the feelings.

  • #613140
    I think we need to understand the difference between caring and pampering. And in that too we need to be able to see the line that draws a difference between being protective and being over-possessive. In that sense, I don't think caring or caring too much for a person can as such make him emotionally weak. It is when we transgress the line and enter into an area which is purely personal that the person starts feeling emotionally weak. We need to draw a line and keep a check so that even too much of care doesn't cross the limit.

    We need to be caring but at the same time should be able to allow the other person to maintain his individuality. We can love a person, share his feelings, laugh when he is happy, console him when he is sad, help him when he is in need and guide him when he appear confused. But, while doing all these, we need to ensure that our care does not cast a shadow over his individuality. To be precise, one can be caring but it should not go to the extent of making the other person totally dependent.

    I am not sure, but I feel we can compare it with a patient who is admitted in a hospital. He is treated by a doctor and is looked after by the nurses; all his basic needs are taken care of. Yet, he comes out as an independent person once he is discharged (help from someone and continuance of medicines may be counted as a different issue). Though it might sound official, I think that is something similar to the line of limit that we need to visualize while caring for someone.

    'Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance'- Confucius


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