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(This thread is the winner of the TOW contest for for the week 7th Jan’18-13th Jan’18)
  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Is love an unbalanced barter system?


    How do you balance love? Give advice & suggestions in this discussion thread.



    We cannot force someone to give love, care, and affection. It is a natural feeling which should come from the inner heart. Expressing the inner feelings varies from person to person. Some express through words and some through actions. Always action speaks louder than words. Be it a family member, a relative or a friend, sometimes when we give more love to a person, we get less love from them and sometimes when we get more love from a person, we give less in return. Not all the times, love is shared equally at both the ends. We all know love cannot be measured, but somewhere deep inside, we humans tend to calculate and measure love in our own terms and perspectives. Most of the times the proportionality varies while giving and receiving love, care, and affection.

    Is love an unbalanced barter system? Should it be a balanced one to lead a happy life?
  • #622279
    I guess it is such then. Love which cannot be reciprocated is called care. For an instance you tend to and care for your plants. Love is a mutual feeling between two organisms willing to sacrifice their everything for the welfare of the either. Having expectations from the one you care for isn't right.
    Your job is to care for them and their job is to care for their precious.
    Sometimes people are ignorant of how to show their affection. This is when the trouble begins. Because of this inability people act clingy and irritating. No one likes such personalities.

    The stronger a light shines the darker are the shadows around it.

  • #622321
    In barter system you exchange a product for a product. That means what you does not have would be exchanged with a article what you want and that is available with others. But here love is available from both ends. If one loves with much care and affection , the other would reciprocate with much adorable way than expected. That means only love is exchanged here and that cannot be barter system. In barter system once you part away with the thing, then you are not remembered or required. But in love the life is the continued process and in fact shall blossom to the next level of intimacy and so on.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #622325
    Yes, there is a balance in most of the aspects of life but love is truly one exchange where we rarely find balance. because both sides of balance keep swinging. Though it may be unbalanced in itself love creates balance in other aspects of life for eg- we can never balance the love of a mother she will always have more affection for us then we have for her and her extreme love for us which is unbalanced too creates balance in our life.
    "It is hardest thing in the world to be good thinker without being a good self examiner"

  • #622331
    Love is a spontaneous feeling of one's affection and attachment to other persons. It is not to be evoked. It comes naturally and flows like a cascade.

    It does not warrant reciprocity. However people believe that mutual love sustains a long time and usually strengthens up with time.

    In true love we do not expect anything in exchange. The warmth and intensity of a relationship is itself a reward and there is no question of bartering.

    Anyway it is a great attribute if one possess such great degree of loving and affection.

    Knowledge is power.

  • #622332
    To love somebody or to share the love with somebody should be a natural feeling which should come on its own. We can't expect love from somebody. That should come from them naturally. It is not a barter system. To give something else and get love from some them is very uneven. There is no rule that whatever extent we give love the receiver should also give us the same love. Some people show their love in words and some will show in actions. Even though somebody talks much about his love towards when the time comes if they are not helping.we feel disturbed. Sometimes we will get annoyed with the behaviour of our loved ones and sometimes we will get very much pleased with somebody's unexpected gesture.
    drrao
    always confident

  • #622338
    I will say yes, love is a slightly unbalanced barter system. It makes life beautiful and wonderful.
    Love is expressed by everyone in different ways. It forms expectations too if remains balanced or unbalanced.
    We cannot really predict how it will go, it would be the perfect combination of happy and sad moments, anytime anger or anytime excitement.
    The expectations are formed and if those are not met, we feel hurt or vice versa. But its the lovely feeling of affection.

    Do what inspires you !!

  • #622479
    Yes, of course the love has immense value in the life. As per a tamil saying,'Anbirkum undo adaikkum thaazh' which means there is no door closed for love. It is easy to identify in our daily practice. If we approach a person with smiling face for something, we will get the work done peacefully lest if we approach him as if we are the great the result shall be negative or slow.

  • #622820
    Love per se would not be a barter system but the things that we do to keep the love going would mean a unbalance barter system. A young couple in love, marry against their family wishes just to keep their love going, a boy or a girl changes religion to make an inter-religious marriage successful, a mother sacrifices everything for her love towards her children or family. Parent's love for their children makes them undergo many hardships to keep their children happy and well educated. These are all examples of love but also the unbalanced cost that one bears to keep love intact. Perhaps if there was a balance, then the person making the sacrifices could be less burdened. Although many quote that love should be unconditional, in real life, love is more of a give and take situation because of the other related aspects of finance, property, sacrifices to keep families and people happy.


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