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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Can we revive the joint family in some form?

    In the years gone by, the Joint family served as one huge melting point of all good human emotions, caring and sharing. It was also a place for a huge amount of fun, skill development and sharing of resources. Yes, there were differences, but these were sorted out by the elders.

    Today, in most families such elders have become orphans. In one family, the mother is a virtual football between three brothers who actually calculate the number of days she should live with them! This, after the father is no more.

    This leads us to one question. How can we or can we ever revive the joint family in some form? Even today if resources are pooled, there will be huge savings and a big safety net as the house will never ever be locked, more so, if the brothers and sisters are in the same city.

    But is such a scenario only possible in movies? What is the reality?
  • #642033
    The joint family culture should come back. Mother and Father will take care of us till we come to a position in our life. They will do that without expecting anything from the children. This is the responsibility of the children to take care of the parents when they require our help. I can say that our family is a joint family only. My parents and my children will stay together with me and we are 8 in the family with a small kid. My parents will stay here or they can go to my brothers or sisters as they like and they may go to our native place to stay there.
    It is true that sharing the parents between the children by calculating the number of days is inhuman. That should not be done.
    It is true in cities if a joint family is there we can save a lot of money on common amenities. I work in Hyderabad and my two sons are also working in Hyderabad. We all stay together in our house. Thus the two sons are saving on house rent and similarly in many areas we will have good savings. More than the money we enjoy our time by playing together. eating together and going out together. It gives a very good mental satisfaction.

    drrao
    always confident

  • #642118
    What a superb family, Rao Sir. Please do continue this tradition, and keep it up. It is so great to hear that at least in one family, this is happening. Kindly see the emotional bonding and the happiness. This cannot be purchased in a nuclear family. In crucial times, like when someone has a minor illness, there will be others to help. There will always be help on hand and a lot of sharing and caring. Please do continue this forever.

  • #642120
    Joint family is really an ideal thing. When we were children,we all stayed as joint family with grandparents, parents and we children. Vacation used to be a happy occasion when aunt(s),uncle(s) and cousins used to come and sty with us.
    Even now many people may be willing and dreaming of living as joint family. But luck does not favour all. The first and foremost is employment at different places. Earlier mostly the head of family only used to earn or the workplace is one's own land or one's own village. That income was sufficient for a basic normal life. The lack of income was to some extent compensated by the home made food , growing some vegetables in the front yard or backyard, sharing all essential and needed labour by all, caring with home remedies when someone falls ill etc. The demands were also less.The satisfaction or contentment was more.((Of course,there were rich people also who had more income).

    Now each individual's aspiration and demands are more, the readiness to share is coming down ,and hence each one has to find sources of income. This makes them go in different directions making joint family concept impractical.

    Now a compromise may be made and after retiring from active career the siblings can try to stay in the same town or village as neighbours or nearby if not in same house. Many are doing so. If the parents are also alive then that is a real blessing.

  • #642204
    I feel it is a very hard task now in this modern era. It all depends upon the employment opportunities. People get separated usually for the sake of work and employment. Also, in some cases, there are internal fights in the families because of so and so reasons.
    But I still find some people now, who just to be with their family, keep struggling for jobs, where the opportunities are negligible and very less and even earn their livelihood.
    And with this nuclear family concept, people have formed an image of the "small family as a happy family". They hardly will believe to move back to their joint families unless their retirement arrives or they get a feeling from inside that they should be with their family and elders.

    Do what inspires you !!

  • #642207
    There is no iota of doubt that joint family is the best way to live for many reasons. That the whole house will be agog with activities throughout the day and there is no question of boring. The children would be drifted from the mobile games and television cartoons and they will be tempted to play with the co brothers and sisters. And for the elders it will a enjoyable moment as they can spend their great old days with the grand children and they like that phase a most. And for the ladies each can plan one activity and finish the same having gossips and many more activities. But this could be possible if the ladies have the broad minded attitude and the living of all are well controlled by the elders. But trouble starts on small issues and that leads to parting ways for permanent and that is the reason being so still people prefer to live alone and not in joint mode family.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #642244
    The society is changing fast and the cultural and traditional values are losing its grip on the new generation. There is deterioration in family ties and knots everywhere and soon it is going to deteriorate more.

    Now some people are realising that the joint family is beneficial for the growth of family members and the psychological support that it provides to them is immense and valuable. Yes, it is very true but how to bring that system back on the tracks? This is a question which no one is prepared to answer. The new generation is not seeing their grandparents in the house and naturally when they grow up it will be a normal thing for them. It is a unfortunate situation. In case of those families where children have already migrated to the greener pastures abroad, what is the fate of parents?

    Knowledge is power.


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