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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Identifying myself - Who am I?

    When I was a child I used to smile, cry and shout at my will without caring for others. I used to think, act, behave as per my choice. Even my likes and dislikes were my own. But then as I started growing up life taught me the biggest lesson called "compromise". I slowly started to change my thinking, habits, behavior, likes and dislikes to suit others and to look more acceptable to the society. I had to compromise on my original self to keep the relations going and to show myself presentable, decent and with etiquette.

    I do not repent it as this is what life is. Many times you need to adopt others thinking and likes to make others feel good and to maintain relations. You cannot keep going at your will and you need to change yourself as per the need and situation.

    But at times a question does come to my mind that "Who and what am I?". Sometimes I find difficult to recall my original likes, thinking, habits, behaviors, desires as I am so tuned to living a compromised life. It seems a series of compromises in life have buried my own original self.

    While this is a way of life, I feel even if we get few moments in life to go back to our original self, it turns out to be a rejuvenating experience and everyone loves to relive it. Who does not like to come out of the compromises and live an original life with our original character?

    We should try our best to extract such small moments in life which make us feel "This is what I am".
  • #645646
    As a child, you did not understand what is life. But as a matured person, you understood the life well. You can be original and behave like a child to your parents, but not to the society around you. We cannot rewind and go back to our tender age of originality. Be what you are. Don't ask who you are.
    No life without Sun

  • #645648
    True. Adjusting and compromising, we lost a sense of self. But this sacrifice is needed. As you said, it is the small moments of life that make you feel a sense of individuality. To put it blunt, the more choices you have, the more individuality is seen in you. So try to make choices. When it comes to choices, quantity comes before quality. Make many trivial choices, to give yourself a sense of individuality. The bigger choices of life are more often obvious. It is the smaller decisions. The less serious decisions that makes Life your life. That makes life worth living.
    The stronger a light shines the darker are the shadows around it.

  • #645650
    That's correct. The child doesn't have enough sense to care for the people around and gets whatever she/he wants from mom/dad. She/he as a child is all alone and enjoys life to the fullest. When the child starts to realize that others are there too in this world then the question of adjustment comes. Actually the world is ours, it is not anybody's own place. Therefore while living in a place that is shared by everybody, a common protocol is evolved in the form of adjustment or compromise. The problem many people face is the level of adjustment one has to make. If a person has to adjust in every situation in life, it indicates that the person is compromising own choice too much. Compromising too much or compromising nothing, both leads to some kind of unhappiness. One who compromises too much is not happy with herself/himself and the person who compromises nothing finds others unhappy because of her/him. To lead a comfortable life, one has to balance between these two.
    Sankalan

    "Life is easier when you enjoy what you do"

  • #645651
    As a child we are not that matured enough to identify ourselves and do all such acts for which we even repent to those acts. But the elders at the home would surely and thoroughly enjoy such foolish acts from our childhood. For example drawing on the walls with so many color pencils even though knowing fully well that it wont be rubbed nor the smudges would go. Even though the elders at the home would allow the naughty attitude in the child and they simply enjoy. In one of the house I have seen the entire home was scribbled with all kinds of lines and dots by the naughty children and they have now left for the foreign countries for permanent settlement and the grand parents are simply bringing back the memories of the children with those writings on the wall and they are living with those naughty moments experienced then. So even immaturity in children are allowed and enjoyed.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease


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