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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Why women only have to adjust, compromise and surrender?


    Is it that only women are expected to adjust throughout their lifetime? Are men expected not to make compromises? Share your views.



    It is said that due to modernisation, education and better job opportunities the position of women has drastically improved in our society. To some extent it is true also.

    Still, I have an observation that in most of the cases the women only are compromising and adjusting with the new situations in their life time to time. Whether it is adjustment after the marriage or after the birth of children or in the workplace environment, women have to accommodate a lot to keep the things in good shape.

    What is your viewpoint on this. Are women still suffering and sacrificing in our families and households?
  • #650371
    Situation has improved drastically now women are given respect like men in their family.
    But still they have to sacrifice more than men. At homes if they are working they are suppose to make food and take responsibility of the kids more than what a husband takes. Also she is more responsible for house hold works but thats wrong when both husband and wife are working then why should wife only be help responsible for this all.

    Sanjeev

    " It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not" ... Andre Gide

  • #650373
    I don't agree. The statement ('women only' part) was correct thirty years ago. Nowadays males also have to adjust a lot. At least males who relocate after joining college or joining service, have to change drastically.

    But, even now, the women have to adjust more compared to men. But that situation will also change.

    Beware! I question everything and everybody.

  • #650374
    It took several years to change the mind set of people and it will take further more time to improve the situation.

    This situation will improve only when we will start thinking that man and woman are equal as still in many homes girls are not treated as boys are treated. They are loved by all the family members whereas girls are not. We have to change this mentality.

    Sanjeev

    " It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not" ... Andre Gide

  • #650375
    Traditionally and historically, men had many advantages and priviledges in homes as well as in working places. The role of women was always considered limited to the household activities.

    With the Advent of civilization, education and industrialization the things started to change and women also started to get opportunities in the earstwhile world of men.

    Things have already changed a lot and in coming times we may head towards an equality between the two sexes though the natural differences of strength and physical stamina etc will remain in their usual levels.

    Knowledge is power.

  • #650376
    When compared to earlier days, I am seeing a lot of difference. During my childhood days, many females are just limited to household activities only. They had no say in any decision making. When I want to take my sisters with me to a nearby city for their education, there was a lot of resistance from some of my relatives. This was the situation in the 1970s.
    Today those situations are not there. Females are leading in almost all areas. They have overtaken men in almost all the fields. But when the question of compromise comes I feel in a majority of issues only ladies are compromising. They have to complete all the works in the house and go for the job. The husband may or may not help in domestic works. Anyhow, situations are changing. In the near future, I hope we will see a female dominated society.

    drrao
    always confident

  • #650394
    In the recent past, we had a very bitter discussion about females and male equality. The good quality of a soft gender female wife is to be very humble and obedient to her husband. As per creation, men are always superior to women in life, though we are trying to have gender equality. It would be nice if both husband and wife adjust with each other to lead a peaceful life, but it will be nicer if the wife is more adjustable than her husband to lead an excellent life.

    A lady should be humble and obedient. A lady should be very soft and softspoken. A lady should be kind to others. A lady should never be arrogant like a man. A lady should bear a smile, not laugh loudly (it would look awkward). A lady should maintain a good relationship with her MIL/FIL/DIL/SIL/BIL. A lady should nurture and care for her children more than the men.

    @ I conclude saying that adjustment is required in life, but more adjustment is expected from the women for a peaceful living.

    No life without Sun

  • #650401
    There are some natural course like the marriages & child birth & if the author feels that the society has got a biased view to a woman or a girl in context of that then the author has to broaden her mind to think accordingly. The author again has to rethink over the matter when she make a remark that, "Still, I have an observation that in most of the cases the women only are compromising and adjusting with the new situations in their life time to time", because a man being associated with earning has equally has to face the biased attitude of others & this includes the everything & anything. The fact of the matter is that both the sexes have their pros & cons & the outside world remained more or less same to both but whosoever has got the idea of balanced life wouldn't have excuses with the others.

  • #650409
    Well, it all depends on the mindset of the family and the way things are going since past. My mother was on and off work for long, and sometimes the main reason she left the job, as she was blamed for not focussing on our education enough. When were entering in our teenage years, it was an issue that my mother is not at home all the time. But now things have changed.
    It is also upto woman now. If she will not put forward her views, nothing will change. Assess the situation, if you have a child and he needs attention, find a way. Work for companies which help in maitaining this balance. Discuss among family members, what are their worries and how can you work on them.
    Ignore negative mindset and people who demotivate you. Not everyone has the courage to fight for good. Be the change.

    Regards
    Iti Tyagi
    "Soar to Success"

  • #650417
    The query is "Are women still suffering and sacrificing in our families and households?" Yes, especially since people continue to have a mindset like the one showcased in #650394.
    When people come at you with their worst, you should come at them with your best (advice given to Selena Gomez by her mother, quoted in Time magazine.)

  • #650418
    True. If the ladies are not with the mindset as explained in my response, there would still be women suffering in our families.
    Should a woman be arrogant to command and control her man? What would happen if she is not kind-hearted? What would happen if she doesn't maintain a cordial relationship with her MIL/DIL/FIL/SIL/BIL?

    Such ladies joining a new family is a real gift to that new family. These days, it is missing.

    No life without Sun

  • #650420
    Please explain me why all these qualties are expefted to be more in a Woman? Because this has been the trend? Who made these trends? We the people. we advocate these norms and continue to do so.
    It should be a two way street. Man needs to be humnle, understanding as well. I have seen major cases where lady of the house is polite, caring and compassionate, because she is expected to do so, she is never praised for this.
    But a male counterpart, who gets irritated when she asks if he needs extra chapati? If he would be visiting his MIL/FIL etc, taking some time out of work.
    It was okay to be rude, arrogant, show off doing normal routine duties which is expected from him. I am sorry, if it is okay, to be rude, and arrogant and come as default trait of being a Man,I am glad I dint raise my younger brother to be like one. These are the mistakes I want him to rectify, and treat male and female equal.
    One should not get away by being ignorant as it is not expected from him.
    Man or Woman, both should know, if it is something which does not require to show their physical strength (considering the difference in anatomy), they should behave equally.

    Regards
    Iti Tyagi
    "Soar to Success"

  • #650426
    The natural gift endowed to women - folk has to be understood in a clear-cut term. Let me explain a little further how women excel in some of the qualities such as patience, endurance and their systemic approach in carrying out a job is definitely marvellous and sometimes the male - counterparts would fail to possess these essential traits.

    Now coming to the real issue in bringing up the kids, for men it would appear as a Herculean task but for women bringing up the kids providing them with all sorts of comforts and not making any complaint to her husband is the reflection of her superior quality and definitely very few males can discharge the roles effectively.

    By undertaking the role of a mother, she gets tremendous satisfaction and I hope such involvement for women is not the adjustment in terms of her duty but reflects her eagerness to provide all the essential inputs to her kids so that the kids transform to sensible men in due course with her rigorous training.

    So the women should realise their potentials and in some cases, they are even better than their male - partners. They need to shed such feelings that the society asks them to surrender and compromise. They have to come up with better explanations of their jobs being undertaken by them.


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