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  • Category: Education

    My son lags concentration while studying. What should I do?


    Are you worried about your child losing concentration while studying? Find expert opinions on how to help children improve concentration while studying.

    I am a father twin kids, a daughter and a son. My son is naughty since childhood whereas as my daughter is opposite of him. She is sincere and listens and obeys us. My son is not good in studies as compared to my daughter which I understand as two persons can never be the same and its not good to do comparison between them.

    But the problem is he lags concentration while cramming anything. He is in 5th standard and still he can't cram things as our education system is like that we have to mug up things at least in primary school. He is good in maths and reciprocate well when I teach him anything in maths.

    I am worried as during exams he gets beaten by her mother as whatever he has learnt before exams forgets and gets blank. This is very pathetic as he doesn't do well in any exams except maths.

    Please suggest what should be done with him to boast him so that he may do well in his studies and gets more focused.
  • #153006
    This is a common problem faced by many parents that their children are not having adequate concentration in their studies.

    Parents have a big responsibility of keeping their children in right track and that can be done only by using strict disciplinary practices. Children should not be spoilt by giving them whatever they want and whatever they like.

    In the present times many parents are not taking this as seriously and simply pampering their children only to repent later.

    Discipline is the key to get things in right direction and if children are taught this lesson properly they will start to take things seriously. Now, important thing is that parents wilk have first themselves keep in good discipline before expecting their offsprings to copy them. So a climate of discipline and orderliness is to be created in the home and children should understand that only after completion of the study hours they will be allowed to play or given their favourite items to eat.

    Some people argue that children are so tender and delicate and how can we treat them so rigidly. The answer is simple that if you want them to learn concentration and focus in their life then early measures in that direction are essential.

    Under strict regime children will adopt to the punctuality and will automatically have aptitude towards study related matters.

    In my opinion stick and carrot policy is to be adopted if we want that our children should seriously focus towards their study. Concentration and sincerety will automatically follow.

    Knowledge is power.

  • #153011
    Umesh, I agree with your point. Parents should learn discipline first then only they can teach it to their kids.

    My wife tries to make him disciplined by beating him but her efforts are in vain.

    May be something else has to be done. Strict actions only can't do it alone.

    Sanjeev

    " It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not" ... Andre Gide

  • #153015
    As stated by you, your daughter seems to be more sincere and punctual in her studies where as your son seems to just opposite. With the prevalence of same atmosphere, there exists a huge difference between their learning capabilities.
    You may analyse the situation in a more better way if you could get a proper feed - back of your son's company and how he is responding the different subjects taught by the teachers. You may take a feed regarding his concentration from the teachers of each subject. I hope, by such investigations, you will get to know a lot of his temperament. If he is entrapped with a bad company. It needs to be remedied. Have some discussion in his weak subject or still better engage some proficient teachers in such subjects so that he picks up interest in each subject where he is lacking interest.

  • #153016
    One should concentrate more on studying to learn the subject completely. Some people will understand the subject easily and remember forever. But some students will take more time for understanding the subject. Another point is the interest one had towards the subject. Some students like some subjects and other subjects they may not like. First of all, one should understand the interests and capabilities of their children.
    If a kid of 5th standard is not able to understand the subject indicates that he is not concentrating on the subject. There may be different reasons for this. Scolding him or beating him is not the solution to this problem. what I feel is a good mentoring and explaining to him the subject in a way that he will understand the subject very easily. At the same time, the parents should try to understand the psychology of the boy and get the help of a good teacher who can go to the level of the student and explain him the subject in a way that he will get interested in that.
    My sincere suggestion is to stop beating the child. Look for a good tuition teacher who can spend some time with the child and teach him in such a way that he will understand the subject.

    drrao
    always confident

  • #153019
    #153011 :
    I will like to add that offending the children physically is not going to help. Beating does not free us for taking further actions in the matter. Beating is an extreme act which is in fact the culmination of our anger.

    What is required is to make the child realize the value of time, money and facilities including food. He should not take things as granted. He should be tackled in psychological ways so that he knows that he will be rewarded only when he does certain works in certain order.

    You might have seen the animal shows where after the performance the master or the pet owner gives the animal something tasty and addictive like pedigree buiscuits. Why do they do like that? Animal mind is child like. They only work under reward system.

    I do not say that our children are animal like. What I want to emphasize is that they are tender and in learning stage and with sincere efforts we can mould them.

    Knowledge is power.

  • #153022
    Your son does not lack concentration. If he had a problem in that area, he would not have done well even in mathematics. The fact is that he is good at understanding things and bad at mugging up. Since you spend time with him teaching him mathematics, he does well in that subject. He understands the subject well and thus fetches more marks in it. He is not able to understand other subjects and thus he is not performing well in them.

    All you have to do is help him understand the things and just don't force him to mug up. Teachers in the schools and tutors in the tuitions do not have enough time to help every student understand the things. They just want to finish the portion as quickly as possible. You and your wife can put in some extra efforts or else you can keep a personal tutor who is ready to take the responsibility of helping him understand the things instead of burdening him with lots of homework and torturing him to byheart the so and so content by next day.

    You have said that our education system forces us to mug up things at least in primary school. You have to change your mentality. If from the beginning years itself you are asking your kids to mug up things without completely understand the concept, the in the higher classes they are going to face lots of trouble. Now, the portion is less. Thus, it is easier to mug up. Imagine when they reach higher classes, will they be able to mug up everything? It is obvious that he forgets the learned things before exams. The thing once learned will remain in the minds forever. Those which are memorized through mugging up will need frequent revisions. One day or the other, such things will be forgotten. Thus, instead of blaming him, help him understand the basics and co-operate with him no matter how slow learner he is.

  • #153034
    Though it is common in that age it is real problem to a father or mother. First of all we,parents should speak with the children freely and let the children to speak with the parents freely. Many parents are not talking to the children freely by thinking that they should not spoil them and they should always concentrating in studies. It is wrong as no student concentrate themselves more than a stipulated time. we make them to concentrate by sitting with them while studying without engaging ourselves in TV/Computer/Mobile/office or household work when they are studying. We should ask them about the happenings in the school on the day. We should make them to study funny and encourage them to write or study the lessons freely without burdening themselves.
    The major thing is parent's attention and care on them is solely encouraging them.

  • #153036
    1. You stated that your son does Mathematics well, it means that he is good at numbers, has the concentration for working out sums, as the subject does not have texts to be read and learnt.
    2. Whereas other subjects there is a lot of content wherein the child needs to read and learn. Your son is facing problem in reading, understanding and reproducing. What you need to do is first identify the problem where your child finds it difficult. whether he is able to read the sentences, or not.
    3. Is he able to read fluently, is he able to read and recollect. You need to check it. If the child has a problem in reading the sentences he/she will be unable to memorize. Fix a Schedule for learning.
    4. If the child cannot read then he/she would be distracted may not like to study, and keeps disturbing. The child should be taught with patience. Take the child in confidence, appreciate this ability in Mathematics.
    5. Make him understand the importance of other subjects for his progress. Reward him with small gestures
    6. Know the child, allow the child to read and memorize in small parts. Do not force him to learn all the content at once and repeat them without seeing. The child may be having a problem with reading, unable to grasp with words and sounds.
    7. Talk to the child why he is not able to learn the other subjects since he is in class-5 he would be able to tell. Do not compare his academics with his sister. Try to involve both of them together in learning, let your daughter read and make him repeat.
    8. Tell them that you would reward them if they both studied together. Do not beat the child as it may create fear in the child. Be caring and use simple flowcharts or diagrams to make the child understand the concepts.
    9. Do not make the child to learn a large portion at a stretch. Break it up into smaller bits and make him learn. Give more of practice and repeatedly. The child may not learn fast, do not expect results fast. It takes time for the child to pick up.
    10. If the child is having a problem studying at home then arrange for a tutor for learning. Talk to the child's teacher, find out the problems faced by the child, in what areas, he is not working upon. Get guidance from them, try to implement. If it's writing then make the child practice writing and learning. If it's reading makes the child read every day to become better. Make it a habit.
    11. Create an atmosphere for their comfort for study time. Avoid distractions.
    Finally allow the child to get adequate rest, sleep and play time too. Provide him with good healthy food to stay fit and mentally alert. If the child has a problem then we need to understand and provide the best possible help for the child to do well in their studies.

  • #153043
    Hi,
    Is your son is the youngest one in your family? If yes, then it is quite a normal fact that the younger sibling is always naughty and the elder one is always sincere and focused.
    Scoring marks should not be the aim at primary level and parents must focus on strong base and grip over the fundamentals. Many times, the child is able to understand everything but to present what he knows is his weak point.
    So, try to become friends with him and try to get the actual problem. Scolding and beating is not the solution and even if you will not stop that, he may stop responding to such beating and scolding.
    As you mentioned that he is doing good in mathematics, means he is not having a problem in learning. Maybe he is not finding the other subjects interesting.
    -You can try to use creative methods for learning. There are many educational packs available online as well as offline for the same.
    -Never compare him with his sister at least in front of him. This may spoil the healthy relationship between siblings.
    -Try to make him understand the value of study and then the circumstances that he will face if he will not study well.
    -Try to learn about his interests and can offer him related things like a reward when he scores better. This will boost his energy and confidence.
    At last, give your best in a friendly manner and wait for the outcome as this is a very delicate age and your strict and harsh actions may cause other problems.

    Padmini

    Living & Learning- simultaneous processes!

  • #153117
    #153019 Umesh, I agree that hitting kids is not a solution but thats the only option we are left with. Sometimes we parents get so much irritated with the activities of our kids that we have to take such actions.

    We have tried my son with everything but he is admamant. This time too he has scored very less marks whereas my daughter has scored good marks. They study with the same tuition teacher but still there is a difference. We have spoke to her teacher in the school too they say that he don't focus.

    Sanjeev

    " It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not" ... Andre Gide


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