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  • Category: Marriage

    How to convince girl friend's parents for marriage?


    Wondering how to convince parents for a love marriage? Want to get advice and tips to resolve this issue? Relax, find responses and advice from our ISC experts on this page.

    I am facing the hardest time of my life (yet).

    I have a pretty good job and pretty good earning (Roughly 16 Lakh per annum). I and my girlfriend are of the same caste as well. But even though my family is good with the affair, her parents are rejecting this. They are telling various reasons like Kundli (I have checked, there are no major issues in that as well) and my dad's Job. He is going for a job because he doesn't want to sit idle at home. And yea, I even have a pretty good house on my name as well.
    My parents went to her home and talked, at that time they talked fine but once they left they said this won't happen. I talked to her mom and dad, told them I can take care of Her and her family. But they just don't get convinced. They are looking for another affair for her.
    She fought for more than 2 years.
    She doesn't want to leave her family, I respect that.
    But we want to live together as well. I don't know what to do now. We cannot imagine a life with another person.
  • Answers

    5 Answers found.
  • This is a problem which can be solved only by you two that is yourself and the girl and no one else. It is a question of your love and life.

    It is said that everything is correct in love and war. So the first thing is please find out if the girl truly loves you or not. At the same time you have also to assess your love towards her. Is it real and at its apex or just mediocre?

    Why I am telling this is until the love is intense and serious you will not be able to take a decision.

    Second most important thing is to understand the difference between love and infatuation which happens at this age with many people. Infatuation does not stay long. It will get over soon.

    The last thing which you have to do and do that boldly is ask yourself a question that if the girl deserts her parents for your love then will you and your family accept her as it is. That is she will come to your house only in her clothes and you should not expect anything from her as her parents may debar her from their property or money.

    In our country a girl of age 18 can take her own decision.

    Now tell these things to the girl and ask her hand boldly assuring her that you will never deceive her.

    This point is very important and crucial because in future if due to any reason you desert her where she will go. The parent may not accept her back.

    So if there is a clarity in these matters you should not be afraid of anything and the girl should take a bold decision to marry with you inspite of the resistance from her parents.

    In fact her parents will also slowly accept this match because time is the only healing factor and the elders forgive the younger ones.

    So, go ahead and have your own life in this world.

    Knowledge is power.

  • What more favourable points you want in this regard? Still you feel it is the hardest time? God forbid.
    Please write down all the favourable points:
    You both love each other. You have a decent income to run a family after marriage. Your parents are supporting the marriage.
    Now if both of you are of legal age to marry, you go ahead and marry with the support of your parents and other well wishers.
    You can have a detailed meeting with her parents ask them the exact reason why they are opposing the marriage. If the reason is valid and the issue can be remedied and their acceptance obtained, then well and good. But if the reason is something else and they want to avoid the marriage with yo, then tell them firmly that you are going ahead with the marriage and will marry ignoring their objections.
    Go ahead and marry with the support of your parents and other well wishers from both sides and your personal well wishers. Best Wishes.

  • I think you better have a one to one discussion with your girlfriend first. Ask her whether she is truly interested to settle with you or not. You tell her that once you both marry and settle well her parents will forget the differences and start coming to you and they will accept your marriage. Once she says ok for that you can just finalise the issue and get ready for marrying her. I think both of you are majors. Let her also tell their parents that she will not marry anybody else except you.
    She can tell them that she will remain unmarried if they won't accept your proposal. She has to put a lot of pressure on her parents. Once you get her consent, go to her parents and discuss with them again all the points in detail with her points.
    Even after all this exercise also they are not accepting, she has to come with you and you both can marry with your parent's support.
    The important issue here is the willingness of your girlfriend to be tough with their parents and in case of requirement she should be ready to come out with you.
    I wish all the best to you.

    drrao
    always confident

  • Prior to finalisation of the marriage, you need to think over the points which are favourable in settling your marriage such as coherence of views with your partner, financial status of your self and reliability of your partner in the crucial stages.
    If nothing goes adverse in the settlement of marriage, it would be better to have a frank dialogue with the parents of your fiance. If you don't feel comfortable in such negotiation, you may ask one or two friends close to you to join in such meetings so that you can raise the pertinent points making this marriage successful. Listen to the points of your father - in - law and respond the positive points in such a union. With the proper projection of the favourable facts, the situation would turn on your favour.
    Even if the negotiation fails. convince your partner for the court - marriage and later invite the guests of both sides to bless both you and your fiancé and later with the progress of time, every thing will be on your favour.

  • The observation & the consultations from the outsiders would be different with probably not matching up to the expectations of the actual victims. This is because the mind set & the perceptions of dealing with the state of affairs after being in the position & when not in the said circumstances would be different for different individuals & would also be based on the timings as well.

    In the current scenario, the situation is very delicate with the involvements of relations & even the slight deviation from the main thread would lead to huge losses within the relationships & at the same time hurting the sentiments of many including with the pairs. Let me take an example of one of my friend here that during our college days he fell in love with a girl who was belonging to some different religion but then the attraction grew on both the sides. When our college were over the boy joined with a good firm with comparatively comfortable salary but during this time the closeness among them intensified. It was quite natural that because of the reason that both were belonging to the different religions & therefore this proved out to be unsettling issues for parents of both the sides. In between 2-3 years passed away & finally they decided to get married even without the approval of their parents. For few times they both were away from their home without any information giving the parents a terrible experience & when they finally appeared then the reactions on both the sides were harsh as still seemed unacceptable. The activities for the couples were too bad as the boy had to left out with the job as the girl's parent used their contact with the employer for doing so & remained unacceptable for long. In this whole I appreciate the stand of the boy that he never let the girl down & this is what I feel the most important aspect here. Now as I know, they are doing good but unknown to the stand of the girl's parents.

    The hypothetical statements & comments can always add to the reading but can't match to the living examples & that's why I came up with the above instance. Being a human being we are more prone to shifting of our priorities & therefore it's up to the couple to decide whether the same relationship & caring would be existing for longer duration or would get end-up when the initial desire of getting married is taken place.


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