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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Hesitation - a secret hindrance towards growth

    Hesitation - seems short, but is a big word in itself, meaning when you know everything but you are somehow afraid to speak. I have been a big victim of hesitation. It not only impacts growth but also you gather a lot of rubbish in your mind. Hesitation kills confidence.

    This can also be called as a 'secret' or a 'quiet hindrance' towards growth of a person. When you do not know much on a topic or something, and you want to ask someone, but you get this one thing in mind, what will he think if I ask him, or will he make fun of me? How will I be able to manage that?
    These so many questions that strike to our mind that particular time and our mind stops us to not ask this and says to us, "Do not know this now if its tough, you can ask later on, don't you?" This is a symbol of hesitation, also of getting the fear of being depreciated in front of someone else. This is the main thing that becomes the cause of also having not a clear mind, a mind which gathers anything that comes in it, and does not clarify on any issue.
    We need to cleanse our thoughts and our mind for a good and positive growth, and for that we need to remove this worm of Hesitation from ourselves. In order to do it, we can practice some good things :

    1. Always keep saying to yourself "I am and I can." There is nothing in this world which is difficult to achieve, we humans carry the great powers in our self, the power to bring in change.
    2. Say your opinion to others, and do not think of what the other person is going to think.
    Every body has full right to put forward their opinions.
    3. Always have this thought in your mind, everybody have their opinions and similarly I have mine, there is simply no harm in it.
    4. Be true to yourself. Love your instincts, try and remove the word "fear" from your dictionary.
    5. Meditate a lot to develop more self confidence.
    These few steps when tried can really help a lot. We need to remove this problem of hesitation to achieve great things in life. Be positive and hopeful, it kills the negative aura.
  • #609464

    Do what inspires you !!

  • #609465
    Some people have hesitation, shyness and inhibitions in some amount and they time to time get the problem due to these negative characteristics. This is seen more in early stages of life and when one crosses his mid age this diminishes in proportions as the person has gained some worldly wisdom by that time.

    Hesitation creates a situation of undecisiveness and sometimes confusion also. Due to this many times we are deprived of valuable informations. We lose large amounts of time chunks in making out something ourselves while we could have ask the simple information from a neighbour or any pedestrian or co-traveller or colleague.

    During student life many people might have faced this and in a few it remains a life long characteristic.

    So hesitation is a negative attribute in life and we should try to suppress it to its lowest ebb and match forward with determination and clear mind and continuous communication with our peers.

    Knowledge is power.

  • #609485
    Hesitation is a bad habit. We should not hesitate to speak. We should not hesitate to ask. We should not hesitate to discuss. Many students during their schooling will have this problem. When a class is going on, if he gets a doubt, he should get up and ask. But Many students hesitate to that. They think that there are so many students are there in the class, nobody is asking about this, so my doubt may be a foolish one. I should not ask. If I ask others may laugh at me. They keep mum. So you will not get the doubt clarified. In the same many places because of the hesitation, we lose many chances. We should not hesitate for any issue. When you have to take a decision, think about the issue thoroughly, and take a decision. Once a decision is taken, don;t hesitate to implement. Taking a wrong decision will be appreciated instead taking no decision. This gives some confidence in you. Many people will have this problem. First, they think and they decide a path. After some time they thinking and decide in a different way. It will be happening many times and no progress in the work will be seen. At least a wrong decision may be eliminated further if it is proved. But non-implementation of decision or indecisiveness will not be tolerated in many organisations. So don't hesitate. Think, decide and go ahead, should be your way.
    always confident

  • #609498
    Many times in day to day life we hesitate, hesitate to cross the road, hesitate to stop a bus that's just started to move, hesitate to express our love and admiration to someone close to us, hesitate to speak up. Often we hesitate not because we want to but because of our past bitter experience, for the fear of being laughed at, for the fear of being rejected and for at times for the fear of facing reality/truth.

    I think once we are aware that the reasons we commonly hesitate are normal and acceptable, then we would certainly change. I think as one matures in life, it teaches us to find the middle ground between hesitation and being impulsive/spontaneous.

  • #609506
    Along with hesitation I shall add another element, the risk factor , that is taking risk and venturing out is also a reason to hindrance of growth.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #609514
    Hesitation is a bad habit, but it happens to come unknowingly to us, that is why I called it as a secret hindrance to growth, and because of that we take, wrong decision at times.
    Do what inspires you !!

  • #609520
    Hesitation like any other feeling must be used wisely. When we are not sure about the morality of a particular activity then we must use it and reserve our actions for future after some serious thought. This is corrobrated by M.K Gandhi is his "My experiments with truth" where he expresses how his hesitations on certain things helped him in his personal and public life.
    But I agree when hesitation is regarding our capabilities then it is not good for our life, Hesitating just because something might cause us embarrassment is not good and we must come out of it and seek help when required, learn things we must need to know, accept our limitations, wrongs. In these things hesitation may prove disastrous at times.
    I have as everyone one of us has undergone hesitation at both situations and has achieved mixed results on them. I have made mistakes by both hesitating and not hesitating. Life is the best teacher.

  • #609567
    I concur with the first paragraph in Natarajan's post(#609498) and the first five lines in Gokul Aravindh's post(#609520).
    Initially hesitation starts from our inherent shyness,insecurity and fear of the consequences.
    However when we become more experienced and exposed, hesitation will be for avoiding hurting others. avoiding precipitating matters etc. Our hesitation may also come from the sense of sacrifice with magnanimity to allow others to have the field. In these situations I consider hesitation as a positive quality. However when there is limited opportunity and we fail to catch that due to our hesitation , then that is a negative quality. Many times hesitation may lead to procrastination and then at last when there is no other alternative we may act haphazardly. Then also it is a negative quality.
    But let me confess frankly, many times my hesitation has only helped me .

  • #609570
    Great replies so far, glad to know from senior members that hesitation has helped them sometimes in life and a noble thought being brought out by Venkiteswaran sir - wilful hesitation on one's part so that somebody else can get the benefits.

  • #609599

    I think one hesitates when one is not sure of himself. There are many interconnecting factors that leads to such hesitation. Your confidence level is of course one among them but then the situations, surroundings and other related conditions also influence your thoughts and forces you to stop for a while before taking a decision. I agree that such hesitations can be a hindrance in your day to day life and also in your journey forward but then to hesitate is not a negative trait altogether; it can bring in positive results because you take time to think properly and act wisely. But yes, hesitation should not become a permanent feature, you need to control it to be a temporary phase. Like any other thing, this is also all about balancing between the positives and negatives.

    'He who does not understand your silence will probably not understand your words.'- Elbert Hubbard.

  • #609607
    Nice to know from all of you people, that hesitation has its positive aspects too. And of course it should not be considered as a negative aspect everytime, it has its positive results too. But yes, it should not become a permanent thought among people, as then it becomes tragic. I would thank everyone for the thoughtful and explaining responses on this thread. As hesitation has most of the time caused me to face a lot many problems , I thought of writing this thread, but with a handful of experiences from everyone out here makes me to relate things in a positive manner. A big thanks to everybody.
    Do what inspires you !!

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