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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Rituals should not be conducted under compulsion.

    Rituals should not be conducted under compulsion. A lady in my neighbourhood died in December.
    He had three sons. He lived with her third son. The two sons and their wives were annoyed with the lady. Their wives had no respect for the lady. They were showing their anguish and telling, we are already suffering a lot and this old lady punished us dying in December.They were performing the rituals under compulsion, they were showing anguish and hatred towards the old lady. Then how the rituals conducted by them made the soul happy.Rituals on death should be performed by heart, not in under compulsion. By conducting those we show our gratitude towards the dead soul.
  • #622008
    It is true. No rituals should be under pressure. The rituals will be conducted under the impression that the deceased soul will rest in peace if we perform these activities for somebody's sake and without concentration or under compulsions I don',t think that the deceased person's soul is not going to be in peace.Its worries will increase further. So it is better not to perform under anguish or unmindful. This is my opinion. But these days many people are trying to perform this at some place by giving money and just going there as a outsider and eat and comeback. I am against to this practice aldo.
    always confident

  • #622030
    Very interesting thread. Rituals are sometimes very irritating to the people who are doing it under compulsion.

    Rituals may be rational or not it is a subject of discussion but whether follow it or not is simply the belief and faith of a person. If one believes in it he can perform it. There is absolutely no issue. The issue comes when family members and society people force a person to perform. In such a case the person becomes isolated as no one comes to help him to get out of the situation. He unwillingly does the quorum and shows his anger through his gesture.

    We should not do these things under compulsion. These are the things of faith and belief. These are not like solving your school book exercises. They belong to the different world.

    The people who are spiritual in nature and have faith in our ancient culture and its ways of life only can feel the magic of these rituals. They get immense satisfaction out of such actions. These rituals were never meant for non-believers.

    In today's society, people are doing it just for show off. To show that they belong to a big family where these rituals are regularly performed. If it is so we are making a fool of ourselves.

    Knowledge is power.

  • #622035
    Under whose compulsion?
    he unwilling sons ad daughters-in-law wanted to belong to the group/community or society and hence they joined or performed the rituals. They could have simply kept aloof. In fact while the dead stands absolved of all crimes and blames these prejudiced survivor still keep the animosity and bad taste. That can ruin them. It was cheapness of them to show long face and act as we have to show respects to the dead, even though while living they were enemies.

    Once a person is dead they do not bother or know anything. It is for the survivors to dispose off the body.
    The belief n doing rituals is only the well being of the survivors and not to benefit the dead. It is believed that the departed souls have to be settled in their eternal peaceful place. Some rituals i is believed are done for enabling that. An unsettled souls is believed to haunt the survivors and thus spoil their peace. This part is same even if the dead person was a benevolent or an enemy.

  • #622038
    Rituals are man-made and is performed for the livelihood of the pandits, poojaris and prohits. Nowhere it is written that such and such ritual should be performed. It is a practice being followed with some belief from time immemorial. Not only the death rituals but also all other rituals like Birth, Marriage, Grahapravesh, puberty etc. I strongly don't believe in rituals.
    No life without Sun

  • #622041
    In relations there cannot be permanent anguish and parting as the blood relations are going to stay even during trying times and I have seen some families that during the rituals of the death persons they keep aside all the difference and work with tandem and again after the rituals are over they are again to the old game of hatred. In every family small difference would be there and that should not be the issue to discard the rituals and keep away. Even though one does not like, the rituals has to be performed for the good of the children as that will affect the children much.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #622075
    Right thoughts from the author. Rituals should never be conducted out of any compulsion.
    Rituals have been made for a specific purpose. If one does not feel like following them, there is no need to do.
    Following any ritual out of bitter feelings for someone does not make any sense and it is useless because the person for whom these will be performed knows how much it meant to them.
    Rituals have to be followed from the heart, it is not at all right to keep cursing from the inside.

    Do what inspires you !!

  • #622088
    I agree with the point that author made that rituals shouldn't be performed if someone does not want to perform them and forced on them.Rituals were meant for the peace of mind if someone gets disheartened while performing them then they no longer remain of any use for anyone.
    "It is hardest thing in the world to be good thinker without being a good self examiner"

  • #622654
    Whatever family feuds are, in most communities, I have seen that people who don't talk to each other, skip marriages and other functions but if someone passes away, they come silently to pass their respects. So, even if the children didn't like the lady, they should at least have the maturity to perform the last rites in peace and dignity. I think, in this instance narrated by the author, the family would have performed the rituals not by compulsion but out of fear of angering the relatives, the people around them and also the fear that it may bring ill luck, if they do not perform the rites in the correct manner. Whatever be it, they wouldn't have a heartfelt sorrow and respect for the departed soul and the entire ritual would be meaningless in the true sense. Just yesterday, I read about a bus conductor who forcefully threw a passenger along with his friend who unfortunately died suddenly during the journey in the middle of nowhere and apparently nobody stopped the act. At least they could have driven to the nearest hospital to help the person get a formal check and certification or informing the police of the untimely death of the friend.

  • #622677
    Anything done with half mind leads to waste. Rituals should have been done whole hearted and ful intention. If house ladies not accepting the sons should do the same as it is their duty.

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