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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Is nuclear family really good?

    Both the parents are generally working. They go to the office at around 8 a.m. The teenage boy remains alone. He goes to school by 7.30 a.m. He returns from school at around 2.30 p.m, eats the food given by the maid, goes in his own room, watches television, goes out in the evening, returns at 7 p.m. Parents return at around 7.30 p.m. on normal days, they are bone-tired, speak one or two sentences with their child, have their own dinner while watching television and then go to bed. The boy goes to his own world.

    Nobody bothers about the emotional needs of the parents. Nobody bothers about checking the progress of his education, his food or other needs. The parents think that providing money would solve every problem. The unfortunate child don't even get the company of the grandparents.

    Is the nuclear family really good for children?
  • #627652
    There is nothing like a 'good' or a 'bad' thing in absolute terms. Instead, most of the things are generally subjective in nature i.e. something may be good for a set of people though the same thing may be perceived as bad for another set of people.

    The example cited by the author appears to be not good but the people undergoing similar situations may not concur with such judgement of the others.

    Consider the scenario when the children are fully soaked in the affection and care of housewife mother but they carve for education in better schools, proper healthcare, nutritious food, spacious house, opprtunity to travel in a private vehicle instead of struggling in public transport system etc.

    Life in India is not less competitive even these days and it is likely to become more competitive in future with the unabated growth of population. Therefore, it is important to earn sufficient money to provide for the needs of the children.

    Let us encourage each other in sharing knowledge.

  • #627674
    In my opinion, nuclear families will result in lack of human relations to the children and to the parents even. For anybody in this world, money is very important. No doubt about that. At the same time, human relations are also very important. A child wants love and affection from his parents. The child may be going in Benz car to the school with a uniformed security guard as a security to him. But after coming back he wants a word of appreciation from his parents and a glass of water from his grandmother. But as soon as he comes home the cook may be serving him delicious food it may not be tasty for him in the absence of mother's hug and father's tap on the back. Such children will have more chances to get attracted to some unnecessary habits which may result in a disaster. So the supervision of the father and a soothing word from grandfather will always keep the child on the rails. He will never go off the track. I always prefer a combined family where the children will enjoy the lovely hands of grandparents and get the morals and ethics of the life from them,
    always confident

  • #627685
    At this moment, I feel nuclear family is really a bad idea. I feel difficult to handle my daughter alone after my husband leaves to his office. Also, a child needs more people around so that she can play well. My baby is sick for a week, and both my husband and I are not able to concentrate on any work as we have to concentrate only on her and console while crying. This is going on from a week and we badly felt how we needed some elders around us.

  • #627689
    Nuclear - family does not allow a child to know the larger benifits which he could have enjoyed with such an association. In fact, he cannot think beyond his parents and such confinement would retard the learning- process of the benifits accrued from such a set - up. He closely watches the activities of his parents and their reactions with respect to any emotion can influence him considerably. He cannot justify the arguments made by his parents sometimes. The problem is still worse if the child is handled by servants living in the family. The behaviour of the servants would be enough to spoil a child if not handled by the servants properly. The situation could have been different with the constant - flow of love of Dada- Dadi and uncles living in the same family. Such togetherness would go a long way in mending his temperament conducive for his normal growth.

  • #627694
    Any coin has two sides & likewise in a nuclear family also we got two different aspects. In the current education the type on which we are grown up, each one of us wants to be independent & with freedom. In a nuclear family it's not possible. Adding,our accommodation is so small in
    a city & cost of living is so high that both doesn't contribute to its existence. Another point is that the differences in belief between the old & the new generation is even far ahead then ever before.

  • #627699
    What I feel that for a inclusive development of a child, grand parents are very much required to be present in the house and under their kind guidance the children would prosper and progress with good knowledge, good information, nice stories and above all a self belonging. Grand parents feel elated to serve the grand children and they are ready to for go their leisure, rest and also money for the sake of grand children. But the parents wont understand this and try to keep the child away from the grand parents and thus the boy or girl will turn adamant and stubborn in due course. In Telugu there is a saying that Pedda Dikku means elders in the house would bring whole some change in the child and also includes mannerism, respect, studies and above all total guidance and support from the grand parents. So grand parents are important to every family.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #627809
    I seriously feel that children in nuclear families are emotionally deficient. So, some of them lack confidence or become arrogant. They are also prone to falling in bad company.
    Beware! I question everything and everybody.

  • #627844
    The major benefits of nuclear families are:
    1.Enough savings of money
    2.Minimum disturbance from relatives
    3.Great privacy for our own family
    4.Our childrens are not getting disturbed by relatives in any way
    5.Our plannings are well maintained
    1.Total seclusion from relatives
    2.Possibility of longing for them in our old age or in needy hours.

  • #627855
    For some, the nuclear family is by choice, for many, it is a fact of life when a family after many years splits in 2-4 depending on the number of children.

    Nuclear families happen due to space (physical and personal) constraints, changing concepts of independence, constraints based on work and finance.

    So, whether it is good or bad, some children have to face it. Yes, there would be emotional starvation and some degree of detachment rather than bonding. The environment in which these children grow would be far less desirable when compared to the that of the joint family.

    We need to work on this by changing the place, having grandparents or close relatives often by inviting or visiting. Spending what little free time the parents get with the children etc.

  • #627857
    This is problem discussed highly by sociologists and also by certain psychologists. Actually this question of nuclear family is a resultant of the change in economy . Earlier people were attached to land and land based economic production. But as a result of industrial revolution the income source changed. People's dependence on agriculture slowly reduced. They were attracted by jobs in different industries. This further took them to distant places . Hence living jointly became almost impossible. This forced to the creation of nuclear set ups.
    A joint family set up is having several advantages over the nuclear one. The main issue which show the difference is in the character formation of children. Selfish nature is generally more among children in nuclear families. The give and take culture and helping nature generally seen among children grown in joint families are very often missing in those grown in nuclear families.
    Among the Second and third generations grown in nuclear set up, even the loving behaviour is not seen very often. Tha divorce cases among married couples are more among those from nuclear groups. Both the husband and wife will be working and one does not depend on the other, naturally wish for independent life.
    Of course there several problems in joint families too. Unless the members have a like minded and sharing attitude, there will be always issues among them. Children's issues also will result in rifts. Thus it is difficult to say which set up is better.


  • #627887
    I have received excellent responses from all participating Members. I started this thread to discuss the effects of nuclear family on the development of children. I feel that children brought up in bigger families, if not joint families, are emotionally more stable and confident. They have a more sharing attitude. What do the other Members say?
    Beware! I question everything and everybody.

  • #628731
    I would agree, children growing up in joint families, have more people of their age groups to mingle with, they learn quickly to be independent, to handle separation and to some extent to fend for themselves for a few hours without thinking about parents. They learn to give and take, settle their own arguments and fights. More importantly, they have the love and affection of many adults around them and hence would be emotionally better off than a child growing up with two adults and one or no siblings of a nuclear family.

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