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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Why are some parents fascinated by other children?

    We all love our children, spend our time, energy and a good part of our lives trying hard to make our children's life better.

    There are some parents who are never happy with the performance of their own children. When it comes to behavior or mannerisms, they feel the neighbors or relatives child is so well behaved, has such good manners etc.

    Similarly, when it comes to education or sports, they feel child X is so good at studies, that their parents have no worries or child Y is very good at sports and extra-curricular activities that their parents are very proud off etc.

    While it's good to appreciate such children, they forget the impact it has on their own kids. The young minds feel let down or develop an inferiority complex that they have not been able to live up to the expectation of their parents.

    I think, such practices should be avoided and instead, we need to encourage our own children in a positive manner that they become more competitive and better rather than becoming more isolated.
  • #632267
    Most of the parents living in gated colony or living together with other families tend to compare their children with others. If they score more marks, they want their children to score more marks better than them. It is best to promote the talent of the students and try to appreciate their best talent in them. Try to give feedback to your children based on their talent. In a such a way it can improve them can concentrate on one thing. The mind of the parents needs to be changed and a counseling session needs to be given to every parent. The parents need to understand the difficulties of students and must help them to achieve it.
    "Earning knowledge is by sharing it with ISC and we will rectify our mistakes."

  • #632272
    It is never advisable to praise other children in presence of our children . It will make them develop inferior complex and they will get demotivated. Every child will have their own caliber and we should encourage the children to get motivated and do their best.
    Another issue here is citing the examples of other children while advising or criticising our people. It will also leave a bad impression on the children.
    A parent should guide and mentor their children in such a way that the best out of them will come out. Every one can't be the first. So don't count their performance by the marks and ranks. One should know the interest of their children and encourage them to go ahead in that field.Then only they can flourish better and do outstandingly well.

    always confident

  • #632280
    Parents forget that each child a hidden talent in them One child may be a good sportsman ,while the other one may be a good artist.In our society we judge children mostly only by the marks they have obtained in examinations.Therefore,if a child gets more marks than his neighbour or friend there is a tendency to praise and applaud the child.
    I feel parents should explore their child's talent and encourage him or her to participate in those activities or fields of their interest.

  • #632294
    Every parents wants their children to be top in every respect. By looks, by behavior and by studies and also having wide general knowledge. When such good qualities are found in other children, they are bound to get attracted and get fascinated. Some children have good grasping power and they can catch up with the teacher and on keep observance of any thing. If that quality is absent in her child, parent get perturbed and would try to mingle with those children to know their behavior pattern and impart the same to her child. But every parent must understand the fact that every child is born with a rare quality of talent hidden in them and one has to explore the same. If a parent succeeds in exploring the same , then they are the real winners. And the child would ably support the parents aspirations as he would strive to surpass others easily with his given talent.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #632304
    I am fascinated by other children and also by my own child. And I also don't want my child to excel in everything, because I know that is simply impossible. I want my daughter to strive to become a better human being and develop the ability to logically analyze every event happening or situation around her.
    Beware! I question everything and everybody.

  • #632328
    We are human being. So & although we prone to love our children but in terms of physical being we compare with others. By circumstance this doesn't show any negative actions on behalf of the parents but this is not good as this will create an image in the minds of the children which will lead to unnecessary competition.

  • #632390
    Children are always loveable. There is no bias of gender,caste or religion. Tha capacity, talent, smartness will definitely differ from one to another. No parents on any account should not compare their own one to another. Especially they should never express the comparison. In very tiny age my next brother found very mischievous (now he is 60),one day a visitor came to our house with their child similar age of my brother. By seeing the boy's calm, my mother told my brother about that boy's calmness. My brother without second thought replied,'we have to see his calmness in their house.'Immediately everybody bursted into laughter and the mother of that boy affirmed my brother's statement amidst laughter.

  • #632394
    As far as children are concerned, I think they should never be criticised adversely either by their own parents or by others and neither in the presence of others, nor in isolation.

    The parents are responsible for inculcating right values in their kids and therefore, they and only they are responsible for the behaviour or performance of their children at any stage of their life.

    As a matter of fact few children are unfortunate to have uneducated or poorly educated parents to face the circumstances when they are compared and criticised by their own parents in presence of others.

    Let us encourage each other in sharing knowledge.

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