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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Allowing children to be, children

    Children are always mischievous. That is exactly why they are children.

    Research in child psychology always reinforces the fact that only children who are allowed to do whatever they want to do, and be free children, excel in their lives. They are more creative, more innovative and develop a lot of "out-of-the-box" thinking capabilities.

    Yet, most parents and most elders think that it is wise to discipline even a three year old child. This is absolutely ridiculous. We should allow such children to play around, and do all sorts of modern art on our walls. This is quite natural and it will only encourage them to give expression to their talents.

    Children who are sought to be disciplined, silently frown upon authority figures and literally take revenge on such elders when they grow big as adults. Many maternal uncles are hated by children for this reason. All elders should learn the art of treating children, like children.

    Yes, they may even break a television, damage at least ten remote control instruments of televisions or play with smartphones as if there is no tomorrow. Still, we need to go along with such normal behavior and just try to tell them not to exceed limits. Thrashing them violently, will never yield any positive results.

    In fact, it is always wise to put children into play schools right up to the fifth standard. It is only in such play schools that children learn while playing. It is only in such play schools that children learn to play and also learn.

    These schools have huge black boards where small children up to the age of five, are allowed to scribble and write and draw whatever they want. They are encouraged to learn through very innovative methods, where there is so much of visuals to illustrate any small point.

    It is always observed that such children grow up more naturally. In any case, capital punishment of any sort should be totally avoided by both parents and children, right up to the age of fifteen. After this age, children learn to be more balanced and can easily see reason. They will also tend to accept what elders say on day-to-affairs, if they have not experienced any capital punishment, when they were young.

    We should also take children to natural surroundings, including hill stations, at a very young age. They tend to understand nature with all its beauty and associate such learning with anything that is beautiful. They need to be told all stories, at least by grand-parents, who would have a huge amount of time at their disposal.

    The more we treat children, in the most natural ways, they will also respond naturally and grow up to be responsible adults. Let us learn at least some ways of getting this done.
  • #634940
    I do appreciate to allow the children being children, but we should not be over joyed with their behavior on every issue which may some times bring bad repute to the parents. For a good parent making know the life with challenges, sad situations and happy situation, all must be taught to the child. Many of us think that children should not be bothered with intricacies of life at the young age they should be allowed to be enjoyed and get all the things they demand. So this liberal attitude in us paves way for more demands from the child to which some times we cannot afford and get irritated. And at that point of time the child gets more annoyed and adamant and thus his behavior cannot be tolerated by parents leave alone others. Therefore children must be nurtured with all kinds pampering, strictness, behavior and above all the adjustment mentality.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #634954
    A good thought about the way to treat children. I agree with the author partly but not 100%. Yes. Do we have to allow the children to do what they want to do? I say my child wants to go and beat the neighbour's child, am I to keep silent? An elderly person should tell them what is good and what is bad and as long as they are not learning things which are not good for him we can encourage them. But if there is a need to advise the child, the elders should try to explain to him what is wrong in his doings and how it will be bad for him. Many children will definitely understand the point and set them right by themselves. This should be the approach. We need not shout at the child when a TV is spoiled by him but at the same time, we should not encourage him for such acts. We should highlight him by spoiling ann article what is the loss and also should tell him that no benefit to anybody in that act. The children may understand the point and may not repeat such actions.
    always confident

  • #635684
    Children are inquisitive by nature and this fact is used by people who like non-formal education. In general, children should not have too much of anything (discipline, freedom, love, affection and protection). Too disciplined parents find that children change once they are out of the home and start literally leading a double life.

    Too much of freedom at an age where maturity is still not attained, they can get misled and lost to the evils of the society. Too much of protection makes them 'çotton wool kids' who do not achieve their full potential and are not street smart.

    What children need is guidance, a good atmosphere to grow under our supervision and not intense scrutiny.

  • #635709
    Really a very nice thread by the author. I fully agree with the author. Children are children and do not expect much from them. In the present age, it is important to give them freedom up to the age of 5. After that age, the children are so busy that they do have time to play or do some mischievous which is the most important characteristics of children.
    Honesty is the best policy.

  • #635738
    I would be of the opinion that the parents are getting over cautious for the performance & the future of their children. This over cautioned let the parents to take the steps which is not desirable to their ages. The comparison within the children always lead to undue pressure on their physic & to their mentality which doesn't let them do freely but instead focused on only few of the things & they began to get into the limitations among the boundless exceptions. There is a trend that a child prepares for a school & after classes they go to some coaching classes with a hope to the parents that this would prove for good outcome, keeping the child in much pressure.

    This whole episode make an appearance of fear of failure in them which in the starting not visible but if carried for long then could have devastating consequences.

    There is a need for being into the nature & being absorbed in that so as to make ourselves comfortable & refreshed. This is the very basis of generating the strength within ourselves so as to enable ourselves to bear the pressure & be consistent with the performance with a way to lead to comfortable life. But the problem is that things are not taking place as this should have been & we fail in our task miserably.

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