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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Are we failing to understand our own family members?

    Recently there have been a string of incidents and reports of common people resorting to exterme violence. I'm not referring to habitual criminals or honor killings. It is the assulat or murder of a husband, wife, brother, father, mother etc.

    There is a report from Kerala, where a woman had alleged killed her parents and her daughter by poisoning them. A newly wed Bangalore techie was killed by his wife in Vizianagaram district. There are many such instances in various parts of the country.

    Without going into details, it is often found that the family or the family members have gone against their wishes. After seeing the ghastly outcomes and when we look back, the decisions between the family members have been wrong. Honestly I don't think anyone would even believe that their own family member can take such extreme measures.

    The collateral damage is immense in such situations, the lives, careers and relationships are changed forever. I think somewhere down the line, families have lost touch with reality, have failed to understand there own children or siblings. Do you agree or disagree?
  • #635795
    I can say it is rather understanding in both the parties the lack of hearing is prevailing. We do not hear the other person fully as well think before come to a decision. We just absorb whatever the other person saying blindly. I have a friend he is just believe whatever his wife says about others without observing secondly. She once wrongly calculated about the house owner's saying of 'not to do this and that' as many house owners says. She just put this matter to her husband that the house owner told this and that with sullen words. My friend without fully heard the topic start thinking that the house owner as a person of finding fault always. He suspect every action of the house owner. I know the house owner well as his face only somewhat seriousness but he is normally a good and helping person to others. On hearing this through him I told him about his nature but my friend did not accept as his wife's words must be correct. But God's Grace one day he happened to see the good character of the house owner and realize his mistake. Similarly proper understanding and thinking twice leads harmony relationship between anybody.

  • #635803
    These are the extreme steps on behalf of them to their closer ones. This again keeping us to the complicacies of our mind & the different ways in which the things or the outcomes are shown up during the course. The unbelievable fact remains that although not a professional killers but still calm while planning & taking to its implementation & in all only few come to the surface to make us believe for the occurrences.

    I would feel that the lack of proper communication within leads to the unrest less which if not get settled on time, then will create more nuisances among them. That the time may come in their life wherein they disagrees with each other without discussion & this could become their habit too.

    But I still can't believe that the disagreement could reach to the level that they even plan to eliminate. But on the other hand & somehow this also seems possible & if we could remember of the murder of Promod Mahajan by his own brother wherein the reason came out as jealousy that one became a big politician but the other couldn't do much in his life.

    Anything Is possible.

  • #635804
    Such instances occur only because there has been a total lack of understanding of parents on either sides. Most of these murders, particularly when the woman commits the murder, are normally traced to love affairs before marriage. In one ghastly instance, some years ago, a very young girl, took her newly married husband on a honey moon trip to Kerala, asked her boyfriend to be there with some goons, and then murdered her own husband with the help of the ex-lover and the goons. It later turned out that though the murder was so well planned, the police in Kerala got a vital clue from an auto driver and arrested the girl.

    It is the girls who have love affairs before marriage, and are forced into arranged marriages. The parents of the girl will do well to understand the dynamics of the relationship, and then get the boy and the girl married, even if it is an inter-caste marriage, through proper counseling.

    The ghastly incidents can be avoided only if the parents are always on the look out for clues, do their home work and watch the movements of the girl. In many cases, the girls are afraid to speak up before marriage, but then go to the extreme levels to satisfy their sexual urges or deep love, or whatever.

    Yes, lack of sanity in relationships is becoming so bad and people are not even wondering how the children will be affected if they get to see ghastly murders or grow up as belonging to families where murders have been committed. We also see an increasing trend towards the "Me and Me only" philosophy, wherein the person is totally unaware or is unwilling to consider what will happen if he or she does not adhere to normal codes of behavior.

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