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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Are they really old age homes?

    The parents take care of their children from the moment they born till they are able to live on their own. Even after that, they will try to see that they are well off. Children's needs are more important to them than their own needs. As such the children should take care of their parents when they enter their old age and look for a hand to hold them. The old person is almost like a child. When the child doesn't know how to walk parents hold the hand and see that the child will walk. But when the parents expect somebody to hold the hand, the children are not able to that. So by spending some money, they are putting the parents in the so-called old age home. They feel that they are taking care of their parents.
    Is it that the parents wanted? Are these old age homes are true to their name. They may be providing all the amenities and seeing that the people are comfortable. But the real touch of their children is missing here to the parents. So I feel we can't call them as old age homes but we can say a hostel or a house. The parents want a handhold but not the comfort. They want to see their children smile at them daily rather than sleeping in AC rooms.
    So I feel they don't want old age houses but a home to laugh in and enjoy the association of their children and grandchildren. So I request all to see that their parents with you always and let them feel at home.
    My thread for topic-based TOW contest.
  • #637655
    By mistake, I have posted the link here. Sorry for the inconvenience.
    My submission for the contest on topic based TOW contest for this month.

    drrao
    always confident

  • #637657
    I don't deny yet don't agree completely with the circumstances being depicted here. Yes we find the scenario wherein we found to have the A retirement home – sometimes called an old people's home or old age home & yes that due to circumstances being changed & due to generation gap, the people after a certain age limit doesn't find relevance with their children.

    This remained the sad part but there are instances wherein the children are taking care of their parents & without complaining. However again a thoughtful thread.

  • #637714
    There was another thread with the same matter and similar message.
    Our country is special for the family ties and staying together. It used to be large joint families. We had the Undivided Hindu Family concept agreed and approved in legal and business fronts. The cross migration of cultures especially after the modern communication revolution has made us more individualistic and less joint oriented. The concept of a home and family is slowly withering away.
    We had a noble concept and practice of 'Gruhastha's supporting the brahmacharis , elders and sanyasis. Gruhastha are those who stayed as a family and home and earning and managing things for others. The word 'saha' in Sanskrit meaning 'always with' 'always together' had a very great significance in our traditions.
    That 'saha' has started disappearing and 'aham' (I alone) has started replacing that.
    It is this illness that is the reason for old age homes.

  • #637732
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  • #637748
    Old age homes are taking money by promising better services to the seniors, but they seldom give the right to enjoy with their grand children which is the most sought after wish of any elder.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #637753
    Agreed, Mohan Sir. Yes, the old age homes cannot substitute the comforts and the emotional bonding that automatically happens between the grand children and grand parents.

    However, what one is observing in practice is totally different. It is the elders who seek out peace of mind, companionship and new friendships among a whole lot of peers, in the old age homes. Many times, the owners themselves go all out of the way to encourage companionship, and this becomes even more easy since the inmates get to jell with each other so quickly and go all to help others in times of need. Since these gated communities are totally cut off from the main cities and have fairly good security arrangements as well, most parents prefer to stay on in such places and keep alternating between their own homes (sometimes partly rented) and the homes of their parents. This is done for the win-win situations to develop.

    As I had mentioned in another reply, once the children attain the age of five or more, they get hooked to smart phones and whats up and to Facebook. And their own circle of friends. It is at this point in time, that the parents feel the need to go to the old age homes more often, than they do otherwise.

    There are many varieties of the old age homes, and those in smaller towns, having a huge number of temples, more so, in South India, come with much smaller price tags. They do not pinch the old people, and they are quite happy and live a contended life.

    The crucial period of a child's life, that is, between the age of six to fifteen, is very important. But since today's children have a mind of their own, are totally influenced by the media and by their peers in schools, they hate any advise and even start revolting against grand parents. So, the new realities force the elders to explore other alternatives. This is the bitter truth, and there is absolutely no escape from these realities at all.

  • #654764
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