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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Do you think parents/guardians are always right?

    It is a norm to consider that parents/guardians or to say the elders are always right. Their viewpoints on any matter are regarded as authentic which leave no scope for contradiction. Parents cannot be wrong, is a very dubious kind of opinion according to me.

    If that is so then I have many 'whys' which remain unanswered. Such as:

    1. Why some parents sell their children?

    2. Why does a number of parents force their daughter to prostitution?

    3. A large number of daughters in law are tortured for dowry, why so?

    4. Within many families, there is a clash of ego, prestige and, authority among the two generations. Is it because of the younger generation or the upper generation is not ready to give up all the rights?

    I feel if the upper generation becomes a little more tolerant, quite adjustable, ready to listen to the opinions of the young ones and finally come to a conclusion after having a healthy discussion with one and all can make the family life peaceful. Such is the matured way of dealing with the family issues to maintain the sanctity of a family.

    Sadly speaking, the seniors very rarely show such attitude rather their ego, temper and demeaning attitude ruin the relationship within the members of the family. It is also true that despite all the love, care and adjustment showed by the parents, the young ones break the stability of their family and start an independent life.

    Still, I would say an extra effort from the elders can stop a family from getting fragmented. Parents and elders need to self-scrutinize themselves because seniority in age does not mean that they are always right.
  • #651300
    A very thought provoking thread by the author. It is very true that parents and guardians are generally considered to be good and caring towards their children and juniors but in reality there are many aberrations in this wishful thinking as they are basically human beings and have weakness of a human as it is with other people.

    Ego, pride and superiority complex are some of the attributes which haunt the behaviour of the seniors to a large extent. Over and above that, the greed and lust of money makes them to go for things which are considered shameful in a cultured and advanced society.

    So it is not so that all the seniors are like that. There are different type of breeds. I have seen some of them who are so meticulous and reasonable in their behaviour that they have contained the whole family in a beautiful and loving binding to each other. They know that to get something you have to sacrifice also.

    Alas, there are few such people around us today and the authors apprehension is more and less true.

    Knowledge is power.

  • #651305
    A good thread started by the author. No one is perfect. Our elders are also not always right.

    But there are different kind of people not all the elders are like you mentioned. There are few who think whatever they say is unvariable truth. They try to impose what they feel and if not done by the younger generation it is said that younger generation doesn't listen whereas they don't ever think that they are imposing their thinking on them without knowing what they want.

    Sanjeev

    " It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not" ... Andre Gide

  • #651327
    In the eyes of children, parents and guardians are generally like the ideals. They always look to them for help and support.

    Unfortunately there are some people who due to their greed for money are doing heinous crimes in society. How can we expect them to be our guides or supporters?

    Thoughts exchanged is knowledge gained.

  • #651332
    The question raised in the plateform is really very delicate but the problems as indicated in this forum can be addressed suitably with a cordial dialogue calling for equal participation from the different sections of the people irrespective of age.
    With the progress of time, what I feel, the people especially some youngsters have been intolerant in their approach and they would interrupt in the middle of conversation. Thus they are ignorant of the views of the other side. This attitude has to be curbed for the better understanding to one another within the both - family and society - circle.
    I agree with the author that there are parents forcing their daughters to adopt prostitution but the other side behind such an unpleasant step could be their abject poverty compelling them to take up such a shameful step. Rationality takes the back - seat in case of poverty and their decision - making process are greatly affected. Solutions to such problems lies in timely help by the social - reformers to beleaguered parents in the form of constructive dialogue so that such a step could be reversed back. There should be clusters of selfless people sparing sometime on weekly basis to hear the problems of the societies and with suitable conversation the problems affecting the families could be resolved.

  • #651350
    No, they are not, and you have cited examples too. But these are extreme cases, but even in day to day life, not always they guide correctly. I am forced to worship and waste a chunk of money per month on flowers, milk which eventually is wasted. To donate money on Golden doors, which is serving no one. To donate money, into something which serves no hungry and poor. As a kid, parents were too possessive and they always wanted me to be away from friends whose parents were more qualified than my parents. These kids, were very good in studies, but my parents feared that one day I will compare and feel less for them (which can never happen, if you nurture your kids well, they will understand one day, you made sacrifices for them). So, not always Parents are correct and I am sure, I will impart the same in coming generations.
    Regards
    Iti Tyagi
    "Soar to Success"

  • #651380
    No one is perfect. There are situations where elders are committing mistakes and young people are suffering because of these mistakes. But at the same time, there are young people who are not caring for elder people and committing mistakes and elders are suffering. Always every coin will have two sides.
    My grandfather was a very rich man. But he wasted all his wealth and my father and his brothers suffered a lot in their lives. But they never took their father as their role model. They behaved very well and somehow managed the family. Their children are taken them as role models and they all came up in their lives with good education and jobs. If you study this case we can't generalise that elders are perfect always. But in our society, it has become a habit that all young people has to follow their elders. But I don't believe in this. A collective thinking and good behaviour will be always safe, I feel.

    drrao
    always confident

  • #651385
    Very practical & true to its fact. The pros & cons can't be limited to for being a child or grown-up but would be based completely on the actions & reactions. Of the others which the author has already come-up with, there would be many more which we can't make a note of in our general life. For example, the elders can even be seen smoking & drinking or doing abusing talks & this is irrespective of the gender. This needs to be understood that we often worked or think on a preconceived notion & therefore could be right or wrong. Based on this it's good to use your experiences of the past & not on any pre-conceived notion.

  • #651403
    I am overwhelmed by the responses the thread garnered. We all have reached a conclusion that parents or seniors cannot be right always and children too cannot be perfect every time. It all depends upon our thought process, culture and, attitude.

    There are parents who do not discriminate between children on the basis of gender, age factor, education, status and, looks but there are many who do so. Children receive a message from their parent's action but some follow it while many do not associate themselves with such a derogatory teaching.

    One of the respected members opined that some parents harm the lives of their children not willingly but due to poverty. I do agree with it that it is not the case with every parent who wishfully ruin the lives of their children. Here, I want to highlight the honor killing cases occurring within the respected, wealthy and above all educated families.

    Some parents are extremely dominating and there is no freedom of speech, thought and, action. Naturally, there will be a protest. I believe children should learn to judge first and then decide whom to love and follow. There should not be blind worship of elders or else humanity will be at stake.

    shampasaid

  • #651676
    A father is judged by his son as below:
    at his 5 years - My father is great
    at his age upto 15 - My father is a guide to me
    at his age between 16 -26 - What he knows?
    at his age between 27-35 - Why he is not stopping his annoyance?
    at his age of 40-45 - He should have seen his own work without interfering others
    at his 50 - My father was a guide to me
    at his 60 - My father was great


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