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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Which is better in old age - living alone or living in old age home?

    Old age is challenging and difficult to manage alone. Those who are living with their children are the luckier lot as they will have the support in times of need.

    There are many others who are living alone due to either their children working abroad or they have been deserted by their children.

    There are many old age homes in our country and more are now coming up and many people are prefering to stay there.

    Old homes have their own problems of taking proper care, proper food etc for the elderly and definitely it can not be like one's own home.

    In this situation what do you suggest one should manage alone with maid servants or move to a nearby old age home?

    Please give your opinion.
  • #657287
    It depends on the person. But I would prefer to go to an old age home when I have nowhere to go. It's not good to live alone as one may have many companions in an old age home. It's very difficult for elderly people to stay alone as one gets lots of diseases in old age and when there is no one to take care in such case it is wise to live in an old age home where there is someone who can help you and someone who may share your sorrows.

    " It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not" ... Andre Gide

  • #657288
    As long as we can manage on our own, I feel it is better to stay alone with the life partner in the old age. We shouldn't become a liability to our children and we shouldn't give them a chance to be unpleasant. I have seen families where wife and husband are staying happily on their own without any problem. These days some colonies are coming with individual houses where the old age people can stay. There will be all the facilities like mess, doctor, gym and others. Pranam in Huderabad is one such colony. All senior citizens stay there. Your children come there in the weekend and spend time. You can order food from the mess for the guests also and they will serve food in your house. The best way is to stay in such colonies with our partner.
    Somehow I don't like the concept of staying in old age homes. It gives a feeling that nobody is there to take care of us.

    always confident

  • #657290
    In our old age, if we don't have anyone to care, and if we are healthy both financially and physically, we should live at home singly or with the spouse. And we can have a maidservant to help.

    If we are physically ill and financially weak, we should settle down in an old age home.

    No life without Sun

  • #657294
    If given a choice there is nothing like staying with children. That is the best thing in our life.

    If there is no one to take care then one can think of joining an old age home. The information given by Dr Rao in his response seems to be a better option, though I have not heard of these types of societies so far in other places.

    Thoughts exchanged is knowledge gained.

  • #657306
    Old age homes, though difficult to live in, offer a sense of a family. Living alone in old age is quite a challenge. Obviously given with a choice they would like to remain with their own family. It depends on how outgoing that individual is. I always wondered why can't children keep their parents in neighborhood. Maybe looking after aging parents is expensive I thought. Well old age homes too require some form of fee then. I don't think looking after your parents is that unaffordable. Coexisting is the best form of living.
    The stronger a light shines the darker are the shadows around it.

  • #657308
    It is completely depends on the mentality of the person and habits of person. Some persons do not sit in a place normally, they used to move here and there and they do not like to sit idle. For such persons living in a separate house is good as they can move as they please. For people used to sit idle and watching televisions, reading newspapers,chanting slokas can opt old age homes where they can avail food etc., in timely manner.
    Normally it is good to spend the old age times with relatives such as son,daughter in law,grand son/daughters. But for this the amicability of DIL and son should be there. They should realize that they (old people) are assets to them in all manners. In many places, I am seeing the old age persons take up many household works by them in the manner of assisting the others like buying vegetables, taking care of the children etc., A relative of mine in his 80 years of age taking sloka classes to the ladies and children, doing parayana in houses and temples and by that way he keeps himself very busy.
    According to me the young period of one might have gone in any manner but the old age or retired life should be spent in the way of helping others to the possible extent.

  • #657311
    This is a problem faced by most of the people these days. This is the resultant of the change in our social set up and the income source. Earlier majority depended on agriculture. Naturally, children also helped in this activities and became agriculturists. This continued generation after generations. That compelled tthe new generations also to stay with the parents. This joint family set up was the system followed in those days.
    With industrial revolution things changed. Together with that new education system was also got implemented. Those educated youngsters had to move from place to place in search of jobs. Automatically they had to settle in the respective places. Parents had to continue in their ancestral homes.
    When parents become aged, they face with several problems like old age diseases and income. Automatically they will have to join with their children. Then comes the joint family issues (like daughter in law - mother in law issues). That ends up in search of old age homes. Now a days sophisticated stay facilities are available in certain cities or suburban places. Different old age couple opt for that. They can lead an independent life with so many friends and without worrying about cooking or such home bound jobs. It is not simply an old age home, but a home away from home. Occasionally the children can visit the parents and can stay together. Similarly the parents can go to children's houses occasionally. This seems to be the best option these days.


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