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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    The marriage functions then and now.

    Marriage functions are an integral part of our society. That is the time when the family persons, relatives and friends enjoy the occasion and present gifts to the newly wedded couple.

    There has been a paradigm shift in the ways these functions are observed. In olden times the marriage function was an occasion when relatives and friends took responsibilities of the task and contributed in the function as per their capacity. That was a time when there were so many guests in a small house but they enjoyed the company and adjusted even with the limited facilities. It was really a fun time to assemble there for a few days and enjoy the function in its entirety.

    Today, the situation has changed drastically and everything is done in a hired place where guests come for a small time and depart after the dinner. There is no thrill of the function which used to be there earlier for a weeks time.

    Do you think in the same way? Is this difference perceptible to you?
  • #658196
    Earlier days in our area marriages were formed as a 5-day function. Relatives used to come and stay for all the 5 days and used to perform the function very well and without thinking about their personal conveniences.
    But slowly the systems were changed. 5 days programme has come down to one day function. Buring 1980s and 1990s many relatives used to come one day before the marriage and leave the next day of marriage.
    Slowly the duration has been reduced and people started coming just for one hour. They come, attend the reception, give the gift and have food. Then leave.
    But the expenditures are increased tremendously. Unnecessary expenditures are increasing. Too many items in the food. Wastage is more.
    Nobody will be helping the hosts and just they will come in time and say hallow and leave. The affections, belongingness and cooperative mentality are reduced these days. More instrumental formal relations.

    always confident

  • #658197
    Yes, there is a massive change in the way we celebrate our wedding ceremonies in our society. Family, friends, and all nears and deara assemble to share the happiness of the occasion.
    People would celebrate marriages of their dear ones with great joy, prosperity, and emotion but all such things are lost in our society. No brotherhood, no bliss though we elevate a bigger event and set large stalls on the occasion but the emotion of being in a wedding is lost.
    They nowadays just look ordinary and causal, and nothing feisty about such event which otherwise used to be the crux of live celebration and a life full of energy and praise.

  • #658200
    It is true that nowadays the excitement during marriages is not observed. I have heard from my parents and elders that during their time it was a big event and all the relatives performed specific duties during marriages. One looked into the affairs of cooking, another the arrangements of rituals, another one looked into managing the breakfast and lunch. Every one of them voluntarily managed their areas and waited till the completion of the function.

    Times are changing, people are becoming busy and for their work, a handful of family members are going outside the state. For them, it may be difficult to manage leave for a couple of days. Because of less involvement of the family members, there are event management companies looking into all the aspects of the whole function.

    Another reason is the family ties. In many families, relatives do not keep in touch with each other on a regular basis because of various reasons and this ultimately is causing a dent in the number of relatives attending family functions.


    "Life is easier when you enjoy what you do"

  • #658210
    Due to the increase in the facilities outside, the people, who have more income or are financially well off, are going to hire hotels or marriage halls to avoid the botheration of carrying out these functions in the house.

    Some low income group or poor people can not think of that even today and have to arrange within their limited facilities.

    There is definitely a big change as regards to the warmth of those earlier functions as compared to today.

    Knowledge is power.

  • #658211
    Yes, there is a change these days. This change is because of the less time available with the people. In the past main occupation of the people was farming so they used to have ample time to devote at relative's home in functions. Whereas these days people are engaged in the job so they dont get much of the time. Due to the fewer time people have the trend of marriage homes have come in existence. Nowadays everything they arrange readymade in functions. Also, most of the people have money so they can avail these facilities.

    But this trend is not good in my opinion as people have become less social and unlike people, in the past, the relations have not remained cordial nowadays.


    " It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not" ... Andre Gide

  • #658253
    Yes, there is a huge difference between the marriage functions that used to take place earlier and the ones that take place in today's times. The difference is due to the difference in the family ties and beliefs people were holding during previous times and the ones that people are holding now.

    Earlier family and friends, in fact, the whole of the village would gather together during the marriage. They would assist the family in every possible way. The main purpose would be to bless the couple all the happiness in the world. Today the purpose is changed. People have different reasons to attend marriages. Most of them do it as there is no escape. They attend just for the sake of attending. Some of them go to enjoy food, drinks, ambiance, and gossips. Some of them even attend to build connectivity. So, yes there are lots of reasons to attend the marriage and the main purpose which was to bless the newlywed couple is lost with time.

  • #658262
    Marriage is a very important function in the life of most of the people. Hence it is celebrated well by everybody. Several people will participate in the function, because the families involved will love to conduct the marriage function in the presence of all relatives and friends.
    However, the conduct of the function vary from community to community or religion. In the community to which I belong, the whole function is held in two days. First day it is a preparation day ( getting ready). This will be done separately at their respective houses. Second day it is the Marriage, which will be done in bride's residence. (These days, this will be in a public hall). After finishing the marriage and feast at the hall, the bride's entry into groom's house will also be a celebration. A tea party will be arranged there.
    These days the expenses connected with marriages are not limited to the food arrangements alone. Starting from printing of invitation cards, taking dresses ( not only for the bride and groom, but for many of the relatives), booking the hall, arranging food and transportation, etc. A good sum will have to be set apart for the marriage (of course, assuming that dowry is not there).
    Here, I may mention that for my marriage I did not take a new shirt, even. Also there were no new dresses for my would be too. For the marriage conducted at the bride's house, not even a single lady member from my family participated. Nex day in my house everybody join to receive the new pair, and to participate in the feast arranged.


  • #658264
    I agree to the fact that the marriage ceremony , which are happening these days are not as same as before. I see in both the ways from positive to negative in fewer aspects and negatives to positives in fewer aspects.

    Spending money on unnecessary things in wedding can be avoided. Until last decade, the bride and groom did not interfere in wedding arrangements, now they play a vital role in making decisions. This might be, because of their peer pressure and their financial contributions. True that it is their great day, still life awaits with lot more thing and money is more important in all phases life. It is good to have control over it.

    If changes has to be made in wedding, that should be this way..
    What is the change you brought in your family's wedding tradition?

    Sri Vetri
    Spread Positivism

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