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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Is it possible that when you write the story of your life, you don't let anyone else hold the pen?

    It's fair to say that when a person writes the story of his/her life, then one should not allow anyone else to hold the pen. The particular quote is very motivating, but sadly in the lives of the maximum number of people, some other person holds the pen.

    In my opinion, it is easier said than done. Any person has to be selfish if he /she wants to hold the pen and write the story of one's own life. An extremely dutiful person would not forge ahead keeping only personal benefit in mind.

    Is it possible to hold the pen and write the story of one's own life? It is not only about possibility and probability, but the point is, will it be ethical? Kindly state your viewpoint.
  • #659621
    Now, while writing someone's own story of life if another one holds the pen does it necessarily mean that the story won't be completed? Actually, it depends on the situation and the kind of story you want to write. In this world, we are not living alone. Some people may feel lonely but in reality, a great deal of cooperation is there between people to carry out any work.

    To carry out any work, one needs to know the process and has to plan accordingly so that the work is completed within the timeframe. When you are well aware of the process and can make the plan of execution you will be able to do it without seeking help from others. From your past experience of carrying out any particular job, if you find others will not be able to help you out or will make a mess of the work that you are doing, you will definitely try to do it without their help. Now if somebody is greedy and think only of own benefit then she/he will never allow others to hold the pen to write the story.

    As I already told that there is a great deal of cooperation between a lot of people in every sphere of life, people must acknowledge others' help while writing the story. Therefore you hold the pen to write your story, but never forget to mention others' help in bold letters who helped you to complete the story.


    "Life is easier when you enjoy what you do"

  • #659634
    Holding the pen and writing one's own story is a bit problematic. It will be difficult to write the actual happenings openly. Perhaps, undue importance for the first person may be given in the text. How one is seen by another person, definitely one who is moving very closely, can give a better narration about the person. Autobiography and biography are different. In fact if an autobiography is available, the biography writer refer that and come out with a better text.
    When writing an autobiography the first person might try to avoid several facts which might not be welcomed by others. At the same time the biography writer need worry about that. Of course, biographies are generally brought out only after the concerned person's death.


  • #659638
    Every person may not be good at writing. They can narrate the happenings. They may not be able to pen it properly. In such case some one else may be requested to write the story in a better way. In that case I don't find any thing wrong. It will be the biography of a person written by somebody else. There are many books written like this. But a biography is not complete and completely correct if not approved by the person. What are the various happenings in life are known to that person only. So without his telling a biography will not be correct.
    In Cinema industry there is a concept called Ghost writer. Actual story of the movie will be written by this Ghost writer. You will not see his name anywhere. Another name only will be seen as writer on the screen.

    always confident

  • #659666
    The word 'story' should not be taken only in terms of the facts and figures of a person's life, but it is also about how the journey of life takes shape. In life, we sometimes give up our wishes under family pressure, peer pressure, or anything as such, later we fail to become a contented person in our own lives. That's where we need to understand that writing the story of one's own life is how a person shapes his/her life. It means no one else should dictate, but one must make his /her choices in life and build it up accordingly.

    It makes me ask that is it possible to make every decision of life without any restriction and pressure. There is emotional pressure as well as a financial crisis too which make people forsake their dreams and desires. It leads many people to deliberately limit their wishes so that no big problem emerges in their lives. Such circumstances compel people to curb their dreams which force them to accept unwanted career and so on.

    Thus, a pen is in the hands of other people who indirectly write the story of someone's life.


  • #659669
    If a person writes his story himself then there is a danger that he may highlight a few things but subside or ignore some other things. So the story will not be honestly presented.

    At the same time if another person is writing it, he can write it well but he might not be knowing the details of the life of the person and his feelings towards the world. So the story will not be complete in the true sense.

    So both the modes are having deficiencies of a particular type and the autobiography or biography will suffer to that extent.

    In any case I feel that the biography will be a better option than autobiography as chances of it's having honest depictions will be more.

    Knowledge is power.

  • #659687
    Shampa, it is just not possible. You need not let someone else hold the pen as long as the story is limited to you as an individual. But then, you will have to shift hands when you enact the different characters in your life as a member of a family and then as a member of the society. One's life is not actually his story only, it is the story of so many people connected and related to him and his life. While enacting the different roles in life, one is susceptible to shifts, twists, changes and entanglements that life brings along with it and in that journey, the pen will have to shift hands.

    Yes, you need not allow another to hold the pen if you are actually writing the story of your life, that is an autobiography, but even in that case, I doubt whether you would be able to enjoy full freedom.

    'Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance' - Confucious.

  • #659716
    I think a person will like to write his autobiography himself. He will not allow anyone to add or delete the perception of society or people about him.

    It is something like writing a story about which you are the only person who an do the justice.

    Thoughts exchanged is knowledge gained.

  • #659732
    Members, I don't think Shampa is referring to an autobiography or a story. She is talking about life as such. Can we look at this thread from this perspective? The author may please correct me if I am wrong.
    'Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance' - Confucious.

  • #659734
    It depends on which aspect of the story is the focus. For most parts, there are others involved, and their stories become entwined with yours and that influences your story.

    But your story should be all about you and your choices, integrity, self-belief, persistence, hard work, inner strength, commitment, perseverance, dedication, confidence and struggles etc. These ingredients can help you write a story that you can be proud of. It should be sprinkled with failure, have a dash of anxiety, be peppered with hope and have the flavour of success.

    You write your story when you hold the pen, but you write it better when you have clarity. A pen is just a tool, you make the story happen, you create a broad sketch and join the dots. You see a destination and find a path to it. You dream and make that dream a reality. You set goals and go and achieve them. Your story is in your hands, you might encounter stumbling blocks, but you never lose sight of the ending, to your story. So, keep that pen in your hand as you write new chapters of your life.

    Leadership is having a compelling vision, a comprehensive plan, relentless implementation, and talented people working together - Alan Mulally

  • #659746
    @Saji Ganesh Thank you very much for pointing out the relevance of the thread. After a few comments on this thread, I realised that some of the members had taken the word 'story' on a very superficial level and did not pay attention to its inner meaning. That's the reason I explained my point in the second post, but it seems the members did not pay attention to it either.

    In my opinion, the thread leads to two different aspects. One is about the shaping of every individual life and second is that if at all an individual decides to write a story about his life then it should be a first-hand experience because no one else can express his/her experience better than the person himself/herself.

    I must thank @Juana too for expressing her view on this thread so impressively. She has explained it very accurately along with the Lead Editor Saji Ganesh who also gave a very proper explanation.

    I agree that it is difficult to move ahead in life to achieve what one desires for by ignoring the people around us. To achieve success, one must focus only on its target and ignore other happenings, but I believe, most of the people fail to become completely self-centred which is quite natural. It can be either frustrating or satisfying depending upon the attitude and mentality of an individual. Though we plan not to lose our focus, most of them fail because of something or the other becomes a hindrance and one ends up by compromising with the existing situation.


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