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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Don’t Spoil your relations with anyone – Is this a practical mantra in present world?

    We often hear experienced and people with well-balanced thought process saying, "Even if you are not going well with someone, do not spoil your relations with them, you never know in life when you may need help from them". It seems to be so true and practical as life is unpredictable.

    Having said this it may be actually difficult to implement this. Humans are emotional and usually have a very strong sense of likes and dislikes within them. Just some incidents of difference in opinion, conflicts, quarrels etc with others makes them develop strong negative opinion about those people and they spoil their relationship with them. They feel that their ideals do not allow them to maintain relations with such people. They think that whatever happens in life they will never seek help of such people. But life is a very unpredictable and tricky journey and sometimes it lands us in the situation where we are so helpless that we may need help from even most disliked person.

    For example, during the job switch an employee may leave his or her previous company on a bad note due to conflicts on relieving dates where an employee wants to get relieved faster, but the company does not cooperate. They will think that they do not need their previous company anymore and they in turn quarrel and spoil the relations with their company. Now imagine the situation when in their new company they need to give reference of their old company's manager or their new company fires them soon and he starts looking for job again. Now when he is not able to land another job he feels that had he not spoiled the relations with his previous company he could have easily approached them for job again.
    Another example can be when we spoil the relations with some of our relatives and friends due to some unpleasant occurrences. Sometimes it happens that later in time we are in need of help and nobody is able to help, and we have no option but to approach that particular friend or relative. But sadly, we cannot as we have spoiled the relations with them.

    Nothings is right and wrong here. There are two schools of thoughts. First, follow your heart and ideals and do not keep relations with anyone whom you do not go well with them, it may give you self-satisfaction. Second, follow your mind, be practical and do not spoil your relations with anyone. You never know when you may need them in life.

    So which school of thought you are from?
  • #661488
    Maintaining good relations in this world requires a continuous effort in that direction for a sustained time period while spoiling relations is very easy and can be achieved in no time.

    It is not an easy job to maintain good relations with everyone but it is the ultimate thing which can pay us in the long run. Today we are in a world of networking and we have to get the things accelerated and get done through these channels.

    So theoretically speaking, we should have good relations with everybody but on the practical side there are some personalities which will not let you improve the relations with them due to inherent ego and other attributes which rule there in their basic behaviour.

    Still, from our side it should be our endeavour to keep the relations in good shape.

    Knowledge is power.

  • #661490
    Generally we do not spoil relations with others because it does not help in any way. In fact it unnecessarily enhances the stress level.

    But there are times when we want to improve relations but the other person is adamant and does not yield. In such cases it is beyond our hands to improve the relationship.

    Thoughts exchanged is knowledge gained.

  • #661495
    Very few people want to spoil relationship with others. The relationship gets spoiled. But why? Because of a basic flaw in the premise on which relationship is developed. In most of the cases, we want to develop the relationship for our own benefits. But this is not always possible. A proper relationship must be selfless.

    Due to our narrow attitude, our relationship gets spoiled.

    "If you are killed in action, you go to Heaven. If you win, you rule this Earth (as beautiful as Heaven). That is why, O son of Kunti, take a firm resolve and fight!"-- Shrimad Bhagwad Gita

  • #661511
    Intentionally we never try to spoil the relations with everybody. We always like to be cordial with everyone. But this attitude should be there from both the sides not from only one side. If you are trying to be good with somebody but their response is never in a good way. Then why we should harp around them. We will not quarrel with them but we will part the ways.
    The relations in an office are two types. Your relation will be official only. They are colleagues but not friends. Once you leave that organisation they will forget you and you will forget them. But in the office also we will develop a friendship with some. That friendship will continue even you leave the Organisation.
    We should not spoil our relations but at the same time, we can't surrender ourselves to keep up the relations also. It should be a give and take policy but not one-sided effort.

    always confident

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