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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Parents and house persons should act carefully as children are watching

    In many houses, parents and house persons are fighting or using abnormal words among them in common. They forget the main thing that children are watching them and start copying the same. Whether the matter is small or big they should not do the same before the children irrespective of their age.
    I went to an office to meet the proprietor one day. Since the proprietor was not in the office and about to come, I was waiting there by casually talking to the steno (male) and found noting that amid the talking he used to say 'Oh Muruga' often. This made me to wonder as he being a christian, how he used to tell in this way. Later only I came to realize that the proprietor used to say 'Oh Muruga' often while talking and this inhibited casually to him also.
    Similarly the children also copying everything from the parents whether good or bad. If good means is ok but if is bad and filthy it will affect their future and image.
    Similarly in olden days parents do never show their difficulty on the children or public. Now the parents in order to make the children perfect and as they think that the children should know the family situation and parents difficulties. In one family the mother was having some inability to sit on ground properly and used to utter, 'I am unable to sit properly' often and by watching this her seven year old child also sit on the ground improperly as of mother and used to tell 'I am unable to write as my hands are paining', like this. She used to sit in school class room also and on the teacher asked the parents called and complaint the parents corrected themselves.
  • #697177
    The author raked up important behavioral norms to be followed by the elders and parents inside the home when the children are around. I have seen in one family that the elders used to address even the small children with most respect and even the five year old child was addressed as if big person of the family. This has astonished me and even asked them as to why they are giving so much high reference when addressing the child. Then the grand mother replied that when we give good ethics and how to address even the small children with respect, the same would be registered in them and they will not forget even when they become big and that legacy of giving respect to all the ages would continue. By the way the children grasp the things very fast and they imitate the same so easily and therefore we must restrain to fight in front of them.
    K Mohan @ Moga
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #697179
    Well said. One should have control over their acts and words all the time. But it is more important when kids are observing them in the family. If mother and father shout on each other in the presence of their kids, they will pick up from that how to fight and do that when they get a chance.
    Daily in the morning, I will be performing pooja in our Pooja room. My granddaughter also comes and sits with me. She will also do Pooja with me. Now it has become a habit for her.
    When children start talking, they will pick up the words by hearing the other members of the house. If the members of the house use bad language, the kids will also learn that language and they use those words without knowing the meaning of those words. So we should be careful in our words also.
    It is very easy to pick up bad things than picking up difficult things.

    always confident

  • #697180
    Our grand mother (father's mother)used to take us to the temple whenever she go to temple, then we, myself and my elder brother were below 10 years. Even today I remember that. We sat in the temple by her side till the pravachana was over, patiently - not of fear but on advise by our grandmother. Her such effort only makes to read ethics and inhibits us to go to temples, reciting slokas etc.,

  • #697192
    Undoubtedly it's true that children copy their parents and other elders in the family whose presence take most of their time are copied most. It's quite natural that a baby in which family he opens his eyes learns from what he observes there- their language, culture, rituals, customs, traditions, manners, life style, habits, addictions, even family vendetta if any. Today his position may be considered as abstract but it should not be forgotten that he is the future of our family. What our child takes from us today will carry it into tomorrow too.

  • #697193
    Children learn by followig and imitating the elders,especially those at home first. Initially children do this just as part of learning and as an urge to be like adults. Later on theycome to know when to do what by trial and error.

    If everyone inthe house is having good habits and good talks, the child also will leran good habits and good words. The contra is also true.

    Many times elders enjoy what the children say with their childish voice and pronounciation, even if it is bad words. The parentstake videos of their children actingas adult movie actors and talking rubbish. They putin social media and get likes. The child takes it all as encouragement and continues. But when it grows it finds ironies and contra behaviours. The same elders scold it when it speaks a bad word. It gets perplexed first and then learns to use it only when it has to show anger or scolding others. After home the child learns a lot from school-from teachers.

    So for every action and reaction of a child the elders at home or school are responsible

    In cities where the space is not sufficeint and people live in crammed spaces, the elders have to be very careful not to take out words and behaviour which they do not wanttheir children to copy. Sometimes elders talk some secrets or adult matters thinkingthat the children had slept. It may noot be so.
    So elders have to be doubly carefuul and responsible in their behaviour in front and presence of their children.

  • #697201
    We remain under impression that the kids are too small to understand the full expression going on between the two adults and as such while talking they ignore their presence. This is the greatest blunder they are doing. We are not aware of their true talents that they can pick up any word with a little effort also they are excellent in copying their elders in both actions and words.
    If we are not careful when the kids are present before us, they could pick up numerous undesirable actions and filthy words due to our closeness. Building their charecters should be our main motives and as such, we need to behave in the restrained manner in their presence. Our behaviours should be such that they learn how to behave rationally with the people and we need to make them understand the different attributes such as patience, sacrifice, love and respect and so on. These attributes are to be followed religiously in their behaviours so that they become sensible citizens at the later part of their lives.

  • #697220
    Children have a natural tendency of mimicking their parents and in fact they learn most of he things from them only. The mind of children is tender and adaptive but once some wrong thoughts are culminated there then it becomes difficult to get rid of that. Parent shave a big responsibility in this regard and even a wrong action by them can provoke the child to same thing as the child does not know the implication of doing it. Child's mind is curious but he is not prudent enough to decide what is bad or what is good. This is to be seen by the parents that he does not pick up bad traits from them.
    Knowledge is power.

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