1. In most homes only one child is there. That child is pampered to the maximum and not given any responsibility even when the child grows to marriageable age.
2. Even if there are more than one child, the new generation children need not take responsibiity because the parents would be earning even after the children start earning. So there is no financial burden on them towards the total family unlike it was inearly days. Now the son or daughter earns and can spend it the way they want.
3. Earlier days most elder children, (oungers too sometimes) had to start earning themselves or help parents in their family occupation at a very young age. That was to supplement the income earned by a single member of the family which was not sufficient to sustain the whole family. This realisation gave them a sense of responsibilty.
4. Most families had greand parents and uncles/aunts. They inculcated good sense and good habits on the children. Itwas the eldest one who got this more and that made the eldest to b more mature andresonsible knowing the difficulties and realities of the family.
5. A n elder brother or sister was held in high esteem by the younger sisters and brothers and the eldest child has to live upto the status and expectation. So that made the eldest child the responsibility to support and help the younger siblings.
5. The eldest was always drilled in with the advice that 'Next to father/mother you are the person to look afte the family"
All these made the eldest to take up maximum burden and responsibility.
Ironically or unfortunately in many families the youger ones did not understand the value of this and even turned against the eldr on certain occasions.
The brothers will be Ok but the problem comes with their wives. Sons are from the same house. But daughters in law from different houses and they will start comparing with each other and problems crop up.
If the father is having enough property and he takes care of all his children, there is no problem. If he required help from his sons, then the problem of comparison starts.
I am of the feeling that responsibility should be equally shared when the properties are shared equally. The father's property is not going to the elder son only. It is being distributed equally to all the children. Same should be the case with responsibilities also. All the children should share the responsibilities.
Thoughts exchanged is knowledge gained.
K Mohan @ Moga
'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
Even this challenging situation would ease
Knowledge is power.
Even the youngers were happy to follow the advice as passed by his elders. But later we could see the dilution in such a setup when the younger brothers did not like to have any advice of his elder siblings because of their different orientations.
The old family setup became weak with the progress of time and there was the the disintegration of larger families into mini families being headed by the different brothers. Accordingly, the fate of the families differed, some disintegrated families enjoyed in terms of earnings since the head of the family was comfortably placed in multinationals but the other families were not in comfortable position due to the weak setup.
"Life is easier when you enjoy what you do"