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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    What makes them to change others according to their own

    When we are joining in a company or office, we are automatically abide by the rules and regulations of the company where we are joining though they differ from our earlier company/office.

    We are accommodating ourselves when we go to an office according to the office where we are going. We are not arguing with them. In many big offices, who ever it may be, have to hand over their mobile, baggage etc., in the security place, they have to wear a coat/helmet type cap.

    But I am surprising why many people especially newly married do not compromise themselves with their in-law's houses. What makes them to change the new house according to their well and wish?
  • #712137
    This is the fight for supremacy. Even in an organisation, ther will be fighting for power. We can see this more in senior positions in offices. When there are more people in the same cadre for promotion and the slots available at the higher level are lees. we can see this fight,
    We all feel that we have to work hard and show our efficiency which will give us a better chance. But some people try to become near to the boss and try to project the mistakes of others in a big way. Some bosses will encourage such people and try to help them. All employees will be very supportive and obedient until they establish themselves and once they settle they show their real self.
    Same is the case with newly married also. They fight with their in-laws and if their partners support them, the will further increase their efforts towards reaching their goals.

    always confident

  • #712139
    This is the hard hitting post from the author and probably get mixed responses. A newly married daughter in law feels that her husband should be in her side from the day one, but when mother in law takes charge and take on her on every issue, she feels fuming and lost. And she also feels that her parent house was good and more freedom. But very rarely the daughter in laws felt that this is also their home and permanent home. And on the other side the mother in laws should also understand that adjusting to new home will take time and should give breather to new bride without imposing so many rules and regulations.
    K Mohan @ Moga
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #712420
    When a girl joins a new home after marriage, it is expected from her to abide by the rules and regulations of this new house. This is as per Indian culture and tradition. This was well accepted in earlier times and was a successful social model in which marriages were conducted and girls simply changed their ways as per the new set up happily as there was no option also at that time. Modernisation and cultural changes have taken a toll of those old values and today's women are independent and in many cases are an earning member and to expect from them same sacrifice and accommodating as they were doing earlier would be something asking too much. So the in-laws also have to accommodate a bit and a new balance is to found out between the old pattern and today's requirement. If it is not thought then separations and conflicts would be generated and would eventually lead to nuclear family set up. The difficult point is to find out that point of equilibrium up to which the both parties have to accommodate. One cannot expect full cooperation but understanding and mutual sacrifice is the only key to happy living. We can't treat our daughter in-laws in the same manner as they were being treated decades ago. This is a requirement of changing patterns in the society and not the requirement of that particular girl.
    Knowledge is power.

  • #712501
    I think both the situations are entirely different. We cannot compare the office situation with the situation in the family in a home environment. When a girl comes in a family there are expectations from her but what about her expectations from the family and who would meet that.
    Thoughts exchanged is knowledge gained.

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