22 Feb 2021 17:02

Joined:	24/09/2013
Level:	Silver
Points:	803

Points:	5

"SWM"- Somebody Watching Me, the biggest disease that almost 90% of the people have.

Somebody Watching Me disease- these are not my words but I copied from a public speaker. Recently when watched a YouTube video, he spoke about this. Yes. Many people, think a lot before they speak or act. May be they are nervous because they feel what others think of their actions.

What the person next to me think of me if I do that? Am I correct or wrong? Will others blame me if I am wrong? I am nervous that others are watching my actions.

I am one among those people who suffer like this. From my childhood, I have a lost a lot of my life fearing that what others think of me for my actions. I was not dared to stand alone. Though, I had knowledge, though I wanted to speak or do something, I always fear how others see me.

I was not so confident. I was feeling inferior and nervous. For example, when I was doing under graduation, in a class of around 100 members, nobody was giving a correct answer. I knew what it was and I was thinking others are speaking nonsense. What is the use of me having knowledge when I don't get up speak?

If I have answered correctly among so many students, imagine how much encouragement I should have received from the lecturers?

Even when somebody critique me on my actions, I can't defend myself even when I feel that I have done the right thing. Why am I not able to express myself?

In many ways I feel like I have lost my hole life because of this inferiority I have. Why am I scared of people? Why can't I act as I like? Do you people possess the same kind of feelings?

#723912

22 Feb 2021 17:18

Joined:	07/05/2015
Level:	Gold
Points:	5840

Points:	3

This is very true that many of us worry about what others think. We all know we cannot please everyone and no matter what we do there will be someone to speak about it. But still we fear about others. I have seen many people who don't do things that they want only for the fear of being judged or criticized.
In the process of being in good books everytime we should not forget to lead our lives. We might have to worry about others or society but this should not happen with all that we do.

#723923

22 Feb 2021 20:35

Joined:	27/09/2019
Level:	Gold
Points:	8449

Points:	4

The content of this thread evinced to paranoia, which if not treated on time may change into schizophrenia. When someone start losing his self confidence or begin to fall in inferiority complex, then entails his mind get disturbed.
It is the responsibility of parents as wells as teachers to find out reasons why a specific student appears to be timid in the class. Why does he look staying back from speaking in the class? Does he get good marks or not? Does hIs behaviour look abnormal? He needs confidence and a teacher can help him out easily. It should be in cognizance of his parents also. If his conditions is not changed , he should be brought to a psychiatrist.

#723931

22 Feb 2021 21:33

Joined:	12/10/2009
Level:	Platinum
Points:	229633

Points:	4

It is an interesting observation that somebody is watching and we tend to behave well. In fact some people are so mad over their look and thoughts that they are being closely observed and that is the reason being so they go for costly clothes and attires, costly mobiles and even costly food wear. But in reality we do look at others just for the glance of it and they thin that they are being admired. Most of the ladies have this syndrome and they keep on having close watch on others. One thing is sure as many are eager to have comments and even the criticism from others and that gives them feeling of fashion oriented.

K Mohan @ Moga
'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
Even this challenging situation would ease

#723935

22 Feb 2021 22:01

Joined:	10/12/2016
Level:	Platinum
Points:	67527

Points:	5

It is actually the fear of criticism, fear of getting mocked off, fear of getting humiliated in a crowd and other such fears that are responsible for such inhibitions in us. In my childhood we never went out in Pyjamas and always wore pants and shirt. One day, I was asked to rush to the nearby shops and bring some medicines. In a hurry I left the house and immediately realised that I was wearing Pyjamas and a night shirt. I felt very odd and was sure that many eyes would be on me and people would mock me. So, I was walking with my eyes down and very conscious of my position. But nothing of that short happened and none took a stock of my situation. I was surprised why there was no reaction. None laughed on me. I realised that there was something wrong with my thinking. Anyway at that time I was too young to understand that but today when I go out in the morning in the worst dresses I have, no one minds that. So, in most of the cases, it is our mindset which conjectures like this.

Knowledge is power.

#723938

22 Feb 2021 23:20

Joined:	10/07/2018
Level:	Diamond
Points:	22789

Points:	5

SWM - the term is quite interesting and many people unnecessarily remain worried about what others are thinking about them. Let's analyze it in a different way. In today's world, everybody is busy with their own task and nobody has time for others. A lot of people nowadays do not pay attention to their surroundings and even do not know properly who are their neighbours. In this situation, nobody has the time to closely watch or observe your activities unless they are given a task by somebody to keep a watch on you. You will find a large number of people, whether in social gatherings or public places, remain busy with their smart mobile gadgets and do not have time to even say hello to you. If you keep on worrying about what others might be thinking about you then you won't be able to move ahead. You need to take your own decisions and activities of others should not affect your way of living in any way. As long as your behaviour remains within socially acceptable standards you should not worry. Unless you are breaking the boundaries you have created around you it will be quite difficult. Only you can do it and need to take the initiative.

Sankalan

"Life is easier when you enjoy what you do"

#723966

23 Feb 2021 12:34

Joined:	02/06/2009
Level:	Platinum
Points:	96099

Points:	5

Many people suffer from this problem. They control their activities always thinking about the feelings of the other people on our actions. This nature will make us stand back and we can't get the name we have to get. I have seen many students who never comes out with the answer even though they know the answer thinking that the others may laugh at them. if they are wrong. Many teachers try to encourage such students by making them get up and answer. When the teacher encourages such people for some days, they will come out of that problem and start answering their own.
If we are not having confidence in ourselves, such things will happen. We should not shy and should not think of the reaction of other people. If we are wrong others there are people to correct us. We can't be correct always. There is nothing bad if we go wrong once or twice. This type of attitude is to be developed by everyone. If this problem becomes severe it is better to see a psychiatrist.

drrao
always confident

"SWM"- Somebody Watching Me, the biggest disease that almost 90% of the people have.

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