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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    People with small mentality also spoil other's life.

    In today's time, whether it is a boy or a girl, everyone is very aware of their career, and even after marriage, the wife and husband both contribute financially to the family. When the contribution in every work is equal, then the contribution of both should be equal in other households' work also, but some people still have a conservative mindset.

    I know one couple in my relation, due to some reasons, the husband was not able to maintain stability in the business and he was failing, again and again, meanwhile, his wife prepared for the government examination by self-study at home and after a year of effort, government Job was obtained, and she was appointed to a good position in Anganwadi. Since the wife had to go to work very early in the morning and it is too late to come back. For all these reasons, husbands help her a lot with many household work and thus their marriage life is very happy.

    But whenever other relatives meet at a function or occasions, they often make fun of him and tease him as a slave of his wife for helping in household chores. Sometimes the effects of such satire can bring bitterness even in good relationships. Some people themselves do not want to change their thinking over time and also want to make others like themselves. We should try to avoid those people and their conservative thinking.
  • #724741
    This is very true that majority of the population has this mindset and nothing has changed yet. Women is considered as women only if she performs all her duties in kitchen no matter how successful she is in her other field. I have literally heard people say "she is not even a women she does not know even to do household things " and just working outside is not enough. People expect women to work yet she is considered bad if she gets some help from someone for household work.
    This is the stereotype set for ages and changing it is really difficult. Even the most educated has this conservative mindset and sometimes less educated r not educated are more supportive.

  • #724742
    If husband and wife complement and help each other in the works, that is not sin nor it can be degraded as mean. In fact the husband should be appreciated that he has known the hard work of the wife and that he is cooperating with the house hokd works and that is the reason being so they could cope up. Others have the opportunity to poke at the nose of those who work for each other. And those who have the compulsions to complement each other should not give the credence to such demeaning jibes from others. Therefore small mentality people have no takers in the long run and they are not cared.
    K Mohan @ Moga
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #724750
    Traditionally a married couple has clear segregation between them. A Husband has to earn for livelihood and giving a comfortable life to his family whereas a wife has to take responsibility to perform household chores and raising children. The women would not go to colleges for higher studies. Although this tradition still exist in our society, gradually this tradition is being discarded by lowest class of the society as well. Girls are sent to school, college and university for higher education. When a person gets education he wants job and now girls also seeking employment like boys.
    If the husband earns sufficient amount which enables him to give a comfortable life to his family then why a woman should go to job?
    I think if both earn money for their family then both should share their responsibilities within four walls too.

    Be indian and buy Indian.

  • #724842
    There is nothing wrong with sharing domestic works by the husband when the wife has to attend some official works When the wife is attending the office and not finding time what is wrong if the husband cooks food for them? But many people think that a man should not work in the kitchen. This is a very wrong concept. In a family wife and husband should be complementary to each other. They should share the responsibilities as required. Then only their family will run happily.
    I know a family where the wife and the husband were employed. The wife has to do all the domestic work and then attend the office. She has to come back and do all the evening works in the house. Even the purchases for the family requirement is to be carried out by her only.
    The husband will go to their employee's union after the working hours and spend time there and come home late. He will never help his wife in the household works. She struggles a lot. But this man never stops his union works which are of no use for him.

    always confident

  • #724845
    Since time immortal the social system is tuned to husband working out and woman taking care of the household. Now the things have changed a lot from that and many ladies are the main earning members in their families. There is a perceptible change in the behaviour of the men also and the male dominance is not as shrewd now as it used to be in earlier times. But the bad thing is that the people in society who are still tuned to the old patterns make remarks and taunts on the families where amicable and cordial relations are maintained in this changing environment. We should not hear these people and if possible do not entertain them when they talk like that and spoil the scene in other households. These people are doing it as a habit though some of them might be doing it just due to the jealous feelings that others are going on so happily in their lives.
    Knowledge is power.

  • #724847
    It is also stereotypical and conveys a small mentality when talking about the husband doing the housework only when the wife is working or away. It should be the case that he shoulders all the responsibilities equally and helps at all times.

    It is also a small mentality to consider that male members of the family when helping out should do only specific chores. During the lockdown, for example, in the absence of a maid, I had heard from acquaintances how husbands and sons would be doing sweeping and swabbing of floors and not helping in anything else. Leave aside washing clothes and utensils, they did not bother to help out in drying them or cutting vegetables, or doing even simple things like making tea and breakfast. Women, too, are to blame if they have this mentality that "No, no, I can't expect my husband/son to do that!"

    When you make a commitment, you create hope. When you keep a commitment you create trust! ~ John C. Maxwell

  • #724849
    I think today's women should raise their voice for equity instead of equality because women have sufficient scope of equality but they are deprived of equity in society even in their own family. I firmly assert that a woman doesn't render equity to another woman. This deprival starts even in her family as a daughter.  Why an old woman wish her daughter in law or daughter to be blessed with a son and why mother is highly pleased when she coceives a son. You might notice a segregation between both genders in a family. A daughter needs justice in her social environment. A wrong notion has been trending on social circle that man deprives a woman of justice and equity. I strongly debunk this wrong notion. What I see in society is that it is the woman who is following this ages long wrong tradition to undermine and marginalise another woman. The author being a lady is also, apparently,carrying this wrong notion. Women also need to change their mindset .
    Be indian and buy Indian.

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