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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Do you think kids growing with grandparents are more pampered and easily spoilt?

    We all know that grandparents have shower way too much love for their grandchildren than they had showered on their own children. Parents might have scolded and hit their children and might have rejected to buy a toy that their kids demand but generally they do buy all that their grandchildren ask and they also do not scold or hit their grand children.

    I have seen many working mothers leave their child with their mom or mom in law as they have to work in different location. Generally, when a kid does something wrong or not well behaved, a mom might scold to get the child on right track. But in absence of mother, I feel grand parents might not scold the child and might give what ever the child demands resulting in stubbornness of the child.
    Do you think child my get spoilt with too much love from their grandparents or will grandparents take a tough step at times to discipline their grand child?
  • #724784
    When we are parents we have many responsibilities and still we are in our middle ages. So we will have different activities. Jobs, household works, obtaining additional skills to grow on the professional front etc are the priorities at those times. So parents may not be able to give sufficient time to their kids. That is why we depend more on child sitting houses or elders in the house. We try to spend money on them and see that they will be comfortable. When we are otherwise busy sometimes these kids will come and try to disturb us and at such times we may shout at them or not give enough care for them.
    But when we are grandparents we are senior citizens and we are retired. We will have plenty of time and we will try to spend our time with grandparents if we live with them. As grandparents, we will never like to shout at grandchildren. We will try to teach them and convince them. We have enough time and that will make us spend a good time with them. But that will not be pampering. We give more time and try to make the kids understand good and bad and the difference. We will teach them stories which will tell them a lot of morals. So kids will be more disciplined if they grow with their grandparents.

    always confident

  • #724788
    I don't say that observation of the author is wrong but I take it in a different way. Generally, grandparents love their grandchildren but there may be several reasons for it. Like- they love them because they are children of their children or they are retired and their son and his wife dont share their time with them so they spend their time with their grandchildren or now they are too old to do any household chores, therefore in order to show to their son and daughter in law that they are not idle or burden on them, when they go to their offices they can take care of their children.
    Parents love their children. They scold their children because they don't want them to get spoilt. But grandparents don't scold these children because their parents would mind why these old people are scolding their children.

    Be indian and buy Indian.

  • #724789
    Children may be pampered by their grandparents, but not spoilt by them. If the children there could be other reasons for that. Rather a spoilt child can be made to see the right things in a better way by his grandparents without being scolded.
    I would say children can learn a lot from the journeys of their grandparents.

  • #724791
    It is not correct to say that the children are getting spoiled by pampering by grand parents or elderly persons of the house. This accuse has come to me also as I pamper much on my brother's daughter by her father and mother. But the pity is in such cases the parents are not caring much on the children as they are expected, so the children automatically divert themselves to elders such as bade pappa, chotta pappaa or grand parents. This is not pampering but consoling the children. I just left my brother's daughter for more than two month because of their accuse. But since her parents do not care on her daily routine etc., and my care also minus, she just going to neighbor house whole day (as schools are also not functioning) or roaming in the corridor but being in the house skeleton hours only.

  • #724807
    I do not agree with the author content that the kids would be spoiled if the nurturing is under the patronage of grand parents. It is the fact that modern parents does not nothing about the child behavior and child wants. They simply tame the child and does not want to get what the child asks. Where as the grand parents by virtue of their love and affection and also the instant connect due to wholesome experience do pamper the child to that extent when the child can be controlled to the adamant behavior. Grand parents are interested not to bother the child with scolding and abuse instead go for smooth transition of their behavior through story telling and reality behavior tips to which the child gets attracted. So grand parents are boon to the modern parents and who ever nurtured through parents have become great citizens
    K Mohan @ Moga
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #724812
    It depends mainly on the amount of the pampering facilitated to the children by the grandparents or even by the parents. Pampering is a sure way to spoiling the child but due to inherent affection and love some grandparents or parents err in this and only realise this when it is too late to do any corrective actions in the matter. I have seen many children who are not ready to go to hostel or some place alone as they feel unsecured without the parents. They are dependent on their parents so much that they cannot think of surviving on their own in a new environment.
    Knowledge is power.

  • #724871
    The amount of pampering may have some relation with the spoiling of the child but it cannot be said that grandparents always pamper more. At times they save grandchildren from the wrath of their parents because of a strong bond but they also do it from their experience of handling certain situations. Over-indulgence by anybody whether parents or grandparents can spoil the children and they all need to be cautious about that.

    "Life is easier when you enjoy what you do"

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