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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Be selective about people's opinions

    Humans communicate and share their thoughts by expression and words. Many a times,we get compliments and blessings. Also, we get ungrateful remarks and abusive comments. Many people ignore it for a duration. Many people reply back at the same time of happening. Toxicity is unpleasantness and hinders happiness in life. To be happy in toxic environment, it's vital to be selective about what to listen, when to listen, how to reply, why should you reply and where should you reply. I believe if we frame our mind to postpond the anger and frustration which erupts in the mind due to exposure in toxicity helps in calming the mind down and doesn't hinder our work progress. In the meantime, it's better to sort the issue in the mind by answering the 5W and 1H.
  • #728093
    Who does not like praise whereas hardly anybody likes criticism? The author has raised this issue of how to reply to a person if someone speaks negatively about us or criticise us etc I don't think it is always preferred to reply on the spot. I opt for tacit behaviour from my end. I minimise my interaction with such a person because I can't quarrel with every ill-mannered person.
    I have also observed if we give enough space and permission to them they step into our space. Nobody can enter your home unless you allow them, the same is applied to the personal space of every individual.

  • #728095
    There are people who want to create the negative impact on our life either through abusive language or ungrateful comments and by doing so they also make others to point out remark against us. When we are right and if the other person try to command over the mistakes which is not there, then we have every right to defend ourselves. But when our response is nil and not forth coming they think that we are weak in responding and try to escalate their negative campaign further to which we do not give the chance. Even in social media the celebrities are trolled for their comments and the dress statement and when the same person plays down the criticism the troll would stop immediately and that way one has to stop the defaming act of others, otherwise it would be hell of life for the no fault of us.
    K Mohan @ Moga
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #728099
    We live in a society and come across many people in our daily work. Sometimes we get appreciation and sometimes comments on our work or behavior. We have to listen to people whether they appreciate or comment. In case we have to give some reply, it should be polite and firm. Later in the day, we have to think it over and if there is any fault with us, we have to take corrective actions. We should not give another chance to others to comment. If we are not at fault, leave the matter there or give a polite and firm reply so that it stops there. There is no point in picking up an argument and create an unhappy situation.
    " Be Good and Do Good "

  • #728102
    A very nice piece of advice given by the author that we can postpone our anger and frustration if we realy want to do so. This is true in this toxic environment around us we met many different types of people and whose opinions are totally different from each other, if we try to please everyone and think about their opinions then definitely we will not be able to happy everybody including ourselves. So we should be very careful about the opinions of others and it's only we who can decide which opinion we should accept and why. We can blame other people for sharing their opinion as they all have a different lifestyle with different thinking so naturally, they have an opinion that suits for their life circumstances but may be not for us. In this situation, we should not give a hasty reply or start an argument but we should understand the points of others, if feel ok then follow it otherwise ignore it.

  • #728112
    We should never worry about others opinion when we know what we are doing is right. People will comment in every step you do. Even if you sit, it is a problem for few people and if you stand is a problem for others and this way what ever you do, there are people to find flaws.
    There are few other people who pass comments on you just to pull you down and degrade your confidence. This way, they make sure that you don't rise up in life and keep passing comments.
    So people's opinion should not bother you when you know what you are doing is right. You can take suggestions from people but only do what you feel is right without thinking what others will think.

  • #728143
    True. If we react immediately to others we may lose our temper and we may not think properly. When we hear something which we don't like our state of mind will be different and in that position our mind may not work efficiently. So it is always better to take time to answer. In some areas even though we know the other person is not correct we may not be able to reply immediately because of many reasons. In such situations, it is better to be silent and withdraw ourselves from the site.
    Reserving our anger is a very good technique many people suggest. You can show your anger on the other person when an appropriate time comes.

    always confident

  • #728164
    Some people are very selective in their opinion as they try to be playing from the outfield and not from the inside field and thereby they would not commit to others. Though they keep on saying that no problem and I am with your assurance and at the same time they would run away when the actual challenges come. We need not believe such people who may be very near to us even relatives. So we have to act according to time and the situation thus demanded.
    K Mohan @ Moga
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #728166
    We are living in a society and our actions and works are open to all and people will have their remarks, observations, and opinions on that. Some of these may be pleasant to our ears while some other would be painful to to our ears as those would be in the nature of offending criticism. The best strategy in such cases is to keep a control on our emotions and take these things as the part of the game and forgive those who do not know what they are doing. We cannot waste our time and energy in unnecessarily falling in confrontation with those elements.
    Knowledge is power.

  • #728178
    While it is difficult to tolerate the abusive language of someone especially when you are going somewhere in connection with an urgent assignment. You think this this is not the opportune moment to give them appropriate reply. They may take the same otherwise and you will be treated weak if no remark is forthcoming from your end. There are the people who would keep you in your toes with their filthy remarks if you listen to them. Hence the best approach would be to keep your objective in mind and pursue it religiously without minding what others are saying. It could be difficult at times but with a little practice, you can change your temperament.

  • #728239
    Others will give you various opinions but it's you to decide which opinion you should take. Postponement of anger or frustration is a good way to keep them away. After hearing something abusive if you are about to hit the person or wish to take some drastic action, pause for a while. Suppose in such a situation if you are interrupted for some other purpose you will forget the anger when the interruption ends. It's a practice to postpone the anger and it is helpful. Interestingly, we can only control our actions but not the actions of others. So, in all the situations one has to try to control her/his actions.

    "Life is easier when you enjoy what you do"

  • #728261
    There are different people that exist in the society. Some likes to genuinely help you and therefore criticize you to better yourself and then their are people who wants to spread negativity and lower your morale. It can be very hard to differentiate. No matter what, what I would suggest to someone being criticized is to take time and understand the significance of the criticism. Replying immediately can be perceived as very naive hence it is important for anyone to understand the complain and criticisms made, carefully try to asses it and understand that wether it is valid or just a vague source of negative behaviour. You might be able to differentiate then, and if you are then I would suggest you to ignore the negative comments and take criticism as constructive criticism and try to better oneself
    Believe in the existence of God the super power.

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