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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Elders will be respected if they will not involve in all the matters

    These days we hear much news about people not respecting their elders or parents. Many people think it is mainly due to the arrogance of the younger generation. But if we study closely there are many reasons behind it.
    Many of the elders will not keep quiet and involve themselves in all matters. Their children are grown up and they have their families. It is not correct on the part of the seniors to involve and try to force their ideas on the younger generation. They should understand what are their limits and they should try to be within those limits. In such a case, I think they will get respect from their family members.
    At the same time, the younger generation also should try to accommodate the seniors to the maximum extent possible. Then the family will go smoothly and there will not be any misunderstandings. What are the ideas of other members on this issue?
  • #730586
    We must exercise caution while dealing with the people. While taking the case of seniors, very frequently they are seen indulging in the affairs of others even if it was not required. This is not applicable for the senior citizens but with the progression of the age some becomes talkative and irritating in nature. The younger generations appreciate such problems of seniors and many of them adjust with the seniors despite their shortcomings. Instead of finding faults of each other, both the groups should realise their merits and should always be sensible and cooperative in nature. Let their be harmony between the two groups.

  • #730587
    Everyone becomes old one day and it is necessary that one has to make changes in ones ways when one approaches old age. Let us now see what are those changes that are to be inculcated in such an advanced age and why such a thing is at all needed. First thing is when one becomes old then slowly he is out from the managing or leading position in the house because of the ageing as well as due to bad health which is so common in that age. When one is not not at a decision making or ordering position, no one will like ones poking nose in the matters and one should try to understand this fact and take care and have patience to control ones curiosity and emotions. I have seen some elders who never interfere but give a good advice if some family member approaches them and they never show their anger on any such thing as why are they not being consulted in everything. If the elder person understands this fact and can adjust in this way then he will get good respect in the family. It is difficult to do so as how an elder person can keep quiet when he was once ordering all the members left and right for decades. But there is no way except controlling oneself. If an elder is successful in bringing this change in his attitude and behaviour there is no reason why the youngsters will not care and respect for him. If younger people do not reciprocate the good behaviour of the elders then they are to be blamed.
    Knowledge is power.

  • #730589
    I am little bit vary from the author's view. Elders are not respected by present youngsters with thought of privacy illusion. Actually no elders kept controlled when seeing erring children and seeing their life would get ruined. Of course almost all parents and elders getting bad name because of their correcting.
    One of my friend was having two daughters. Though initially the children grown with good manners, after finishing college, the elder daughter roam as she please in untimely. My friend his wife pointed out her this attitude but she did not care. After certain days they arranged marriage for her. She went to Bangalore with her husband. But after ten days their sun in law returned to their house alone by saying that my friend's daughter left the house by relieving mangalsutra. Everybody got panic. Later they heard the she was living with another person who already got married. Though my friend and his wife went there by advising her to rejoin with her husband but went failed. My friend and his family got heart broken. But after one year, due to some quarrel in their house this girl, my friend's daughter, committed suicide.

  • #730615
    What I feel that the elders take as right to involve and correct on all the matters to which the young ones are new and does not know iota of the same. Elders always take pride to be consulted and taken the action. But educated youth feels that they are capable enough to take independent and own decision. It is good that young ones should be given the freedom to realize their duties but that should not be at the cost of wrong understanding the issue or the matter and attending very differently. May good sense prevail with the elders and young ones to work in tandem to avoid any kind of misunderstanding on every issues.
    K Mohan @ Moga
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #730623
    Those who have seniors in their own homes know their value. But how does the new generation view the Elderly People? They have different views and perspectives on many issues. Especially in nuclear families. In the old days, seniors were an important factor in family life. The generation at that time considered it a blessing with transferred Principles of them to live.

    But times have changed, and so has generation. The current education system has lagged in understanding the value of the elders in a home. It can be said that busy life and new priorities do not value the position of the elders. As the author points out, many people do not like the comments of elders in many places and out of place. It may also a motive of some to avoid such people and move on with their lives.

    One thing is for sure., in older large families the words of the older had their value, and the younger generation had to remember it. It cannot be hidden that the life experiences of these elders were an inspiration to the new generation of that time and a force to carry on with their lives.

    "Cheruthulli Peruvellam"
    small drops make a mighty ocean

  • #730629
    I feel bad when I see old.people are insulted directly or indirectly, and generally, they are insulted by those people for whom they sacrificed their lives, invested all their resources and energy for their welfare and gave them all comforts in their lives. But what happens to their issues that they change themselves. This is quite pathetic. They realise when they are insulted by their issues.
    I think those old people who are totally dependent on their issues should reserve themselves. They should not interfere in their personal matter and if they are not asked for suggestions they should refrain from teaching their issues what to do or what not to do.

  • #730650
    Maybe this observation of the author on the basis of society in the present times, I will not give consent or disagreement in this matter, but I will share my experience because I am really proud of my family's values.
    Even today in my family my father does not sit and talk in front of my grandfather and this is the way the next generation ie we got. Even today, my father and his brother mean my uncles cannot deny Grandpa, in the same way, we cannot deny our elders, but still, there is no fear here, we all feel happy in respect of our elders. And not only that, everyone is consulted on important topics. But one small change that we felt was necessary and that we have brought in our family, that is, my nephew and nieces are expecting that they would be more friendly behavior with us so that they feel free to talk to us at any matter, it is necessary for this time.

  • #730731
    This is an interesting observation by the author. In every house we can see this happening that habitually elders will poke their nose everywhere without thinking that now they have become old and should keep away from many matters where because of age they have nothing to add or contribute. Those elders who understand this and give their advices only when asked are respected well.
    Thoughts exchanged is knowledge gained.

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