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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Even if they mind it's their choice

    Many times we say "If you don't mind, may I do this?" or "Please don't mind it happened by chance". Whatever may be the case, we say this because we assume that something is happening in the mind of the other person which is not so pleasant and possibly in the reverse direction. We use those phrases as a balm thinking that it will have a lesser negative impact on the mind. I am not sure whether these phrases really serve the intention but one thing for sure that the term "don't mind" do alert our minds. Maybe the person wouldn't even remember something associated with the action but after hearing the term "don't mind" the mind may start delving into the past to recollect something which was actually not so pleasant. Now the important question is whether somebody minds or not is her/his choice and neither we can force the person not to mind nor can we do anything if the person minds something. We can only have control over our minds. Then why we say such things? Members, what do you say?
  • #735757
    Taking excuse under different guise has been the bait of some and they use the words dont mind to escape from the reality and later they would change to the reality. Whether we mind or not, others have their own choice to choose and even go out of way to embrace their own thought process. There are people who want to create problem to others and when they are questioned about the same they plead ignorance and ask not to mind. Likewise even when big mistake is made in the office there are some empployees who want to escape from the punishment and want the higher up to take it easy.
    K Mohan @ Moga
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #735773
    Saying someone Dont mind is evident that he felt something bad on someone's part. Does saying don't mind alleviate his miffing or calm him down I can't say, however, mostly it works right on target and anger fizzles out.
    I think if we really feel our mistake that has irked someone we should apologise to him instead of throwing some formalities of Dont mind. Saying Dont mind may irritate someone if we have hurt him badly, in this situation saying sorry or offering an apology in another decent way will cool him down. Saying sorry doesn't degrade us if we have hurt someone.

  • #735778
    The thoughts are correct. We can't go on pleasing everybody every time. Somebody else may not feel happy with the actions we are taking. But as long as we are correct and we are not making somebody suffer we need not worry about the feelings of such persons.
    When we decided to do something we will think and see whether we are deliberately doing any harm to anybody. If such things are there we may change our path so that there is no harm to everybody. If anybody's permission is required we will take it. Then we can proceed and complete our task.
    Some may be unhappy and why should we think about their unhappiness when we are not causing that. But some people always try to please others and they use these soothing words. But that is not required I feel. At the same time, we should not hurt anybody with our actions.

    always confident

  • #735780
    This is true that we can not change someone's mind but by saying " Please don't mind" we create a positive atmosphere so that if we may doing something that could be unlike by others still they not feel too bad with the help of this statement. There are many more words or sentences that are just using but actually, we do not mean it. I mean if I some person give me anything as per his/her wish that saying thank you is genuine but when we asked for something then someone gives anything so here maybe our then you will not be affected in the same way. We can not say that if someone does not like any of our work then it is not our issue because it is their choice, as we have humanity and there are many values or morals that we should follow and we do so. If some moral words or sentences help to make a peaceful environment then there is no harm to use those before the work we have done.

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