Coming to the question of a gap, there is no specification. It all depends on the convenience of both parties. They should have enough time to invite all their friends and relatives who are away from their place and the relations should be given sufficient time to get their travel plan made and make the travel arrangements.
These days some parties can do all arrangements for marriage in a maximum of a week's time. The only requirement is money and if you have that, there is no problem in making the arrangements in no time. I think a minimum of one month gap may be necessary.
People can exhibit what they possess. If you possess simplicity, you show that. If you possess opulence more than anything, you exhibit that. It is as simple as that.
The Covid pandemic situation has proved that many things which were held with luxury and gaudiness can be done in a very simple way. So we know what is really essential. It all depends on the will and ways.
Even those who blame the rich and wealthy people about lavishness and waste also are to be blamed as they themselves do the same in their own way.
As regards the money spent on the engagement function it depends on the financial condition of the person and nowadays it is being seen that people who can afford and have good financial condition are spending money like water and it is creating a big problem for the middle class who also try to do in better ways taking the lead from these show offs. In copying these show offs the middle class are getting ruined financially. In my opinion people even should not spend so much money in the marriage ceremony and what to talk about the engagement function.
Knowledge is power.
We might see a considerable gap between the engagement and marriage due to various reasons such as bridegroom is preparing for UPSC examination or bride is engaged for her medical examination. For others, they, too, are engaged for different careers. So the gap between the two functions cannot be denied. However, both the families to be united would like to celebrate with a different mode with demonstrating their affluence. Such a demonstration is not very surprising in the Indian families.
K Mohan @ Moga
'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
Even this challenging situation would ease
However the engagements is the pre-marriage decision about conduct of marriage and the mutual formal interactive decision making function for that. Hence it used to be a closed function involving the very close relatives in both side families of the bride and groom.
By and by marriages used to be held at a place and venue not necessarily that of either bride or groom. Moreover marriage had to be fixed on a mutually convenient date and as per availability of marriage hall and other facilities, there happens a gap of even many months between engagement and marriage. This may lead to situations when all friends and relatives may not be able to attend marriage function. So as a social convenience, people used to celebrate engagement in a wider way. This has now come to be a norm. This has pros and cons. There are may instances when the marriage breaks off after engagement as difference occurs between the bride and groom or between the families due to various reasons, in the intervening time. So in some families the engagement is celebrated as a large event and marriage is held without much gap and conducted as a relatively smaller affair with focus to tradition and family involvement.
The pandemic restriction situation has led to smaller way of celebrations.
A boy in our distant relative side got a wedlock. Both the parents planned a betrothal to celebrate in a grand manner as they both having one child each. Every thing went on well as they lavishly spent for the engagement function by calling everybody. The boy was working in Bangalore with a noted employer. The girl's father by talking with the bridegroom after the engagement, asked him to have a own house in Bangalore. The boy and his parents agreed for this and got a new house nearby his workplace. After a gap of 15 days, on the before day of the marriage every body assembled in the marriage hall, The boy came by flight and reached the Marriage hall on the previous day of the marriage. Formalities of the first day were over but the girl found missing from the marriage hall as she eloped with a boy who she loved earlier, without the knowledge of her parents. Both the parents were in the state of nearly almost mad.
This was happened really and I pointed this here to just not to defame anybody but to have simple engagement function with really family members.