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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    In some situations, it becomes very difficult to say no.

    If it is not always right to say yes to someone then it is also wrong to say no every time and we may keep on saying yes or no according to the time and situation. But sometimes some situations are created when we are hesitant to say no and can not even say yes, at such times we find some support who can convey our "no" message to the person concerned. We also find such an example when it comes to arranged marriages. Where two families meet, discussions take place very well, but if one family does not find the relationship appropriate, then the family hesitate to say no to people in front as they feel very bad for not doing it. Such any of situation has also faced by you when you wanted to say no but it was very difficult.
  • #745352
    I can't say no, but I have to say that such a situation comes into everyone's life. In society, we all live with everyone as we are. But it is important to be consistent at all times regarding your judgment. Everyone's personality is not the same so my choice may not be the choice of others. That means I or he can't be wrong. It is entirely a matter of the individual. Even if we want to give alms to a beggar, we often can't because we don't have money. The author gives an example of a marriage situation here, but one thing you may have to suffer for the rest of your life when you can't say it. So the word yes for the right thing and no for the other should be said immediately according to one's own intellect. If you can't speak in front of everyone, ask for time, like we will let you know tomorrow, but of course, tell.
    Believe in the existence of God the superpower.

  • #745353
    Especially, during the marriages, the bride side would have such problems with NO. Because the bridegrooms family will have an upper hand to demand and get them. There would be lot of proposals and demands. In such a situation, the brides family should make everything clear by saying yes or no. While yes will get on well, no would disappoint them. " We will consider it if possible - Let us think it over -Give us some time" etc can replace NO.
    No life without Sun

  • #745356
    In Hindu culture it is customary for every girl family to face this situation that after seeing the bride, whether they would say yes or no. I think frank discussions must take place here and first of all both the boy and girl should talk to each other before elders deciding on the alliance. Normally in the talk both of them would share feeling or having any other affair so that the marriage can be thwarted by saying no in a dignified manner. But a girl who is getting married need to be consulted before arranging for the alliance or the meeting of the groom and that would be hesitating meeting because nothing has been arrived upon and decision making cannot be possible. However frankness from both sides are very important so that any misgivings can be cleared and there is no further escalation or hope on the same alliance in future.
    K Mohan @ Moga
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #745378
    Marriage is not a small issue. One time in a lifetime affair. So if any of the two involves that is bride and bridegroom is having any apprehensions, those points should be discussed and if there is any hesitation we should stop going further. It is better to say no initially than suffer afterwards throughout life. We should be able to say no if it is required. We should never hesitate.
    As far as I am concerned, I will say no when it is required. But I will try to convey it smoothly and politely without making others get offended. Some people use harsh words and bluntly say no. That may not be liked by many people. We should be able to convey our views very softly and then say no so that the person will never get annoyed.
    Sometimes in some situations, we may accept some issues with hesitation and after some time we may feel that we unnecessarily get into the mess. So we should think correctly in the initial stage itself.

    always confident

  • #745409
    Sometimes some situations arise in our lives when we cannot say 'no'. Some people are very straight forward and blunt and tell 'no' with confidence and do not bother for the future consequences of using this two letter word. Every person will not be so courageous.
    Some people are very diplomatic and they tell 'no' easily but in such a way that the other person is not hurt. Such diplomatic persons are very successful in their practical lives as they know the art of telling no.

    Knowledge is power.

  • #745410
    It may become difficult to say no in some situations but if it is necessary to say no then one has to overcome all the difficulties to say no. If we go on seeing who is going to feel what in every situation without thinking of our own position then I think we can suffer. There are many things that we find difficult but we do. Think of a student who finds a specific subject quite tough and thinks it is quite difficult to secure pass marks in that subject. But to pass the exam, the student has to overcome the difficulties to score pass marks. So, whatever may be the situation it is important to be assertive otherwise, things can be complicated later on if one doesn't speak up.

    "Life is easier when you enjoy what you do"

  • #745413
    It is very true as the author has written that sometimes, we find ourselves in a fix or dilemma when decision is hard to be taken or saying No to someone because this negation may, rather more aptly, will hurt him/her and it will not be easy for us.
    The author has given the example of marriage proposal when either side is not satisfied to this proposed new ties between two families, I think middle man will convey this message.

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