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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    Expecting politeness from others but not reciprocating

    Human nature is very strange. We always expect politeness, courtesy, and good behaviour from others. At the same time do we reciprocate in the same way with others? This is a question that we must ask ourselves. Even in a family it is often seen that one family member criticises and hates something which he himself is doing with other family members. For example a child will not like his mother shouting on him but at the same time he will be shouting on his mother from time to time. Similarly in the society also there are some people who behave in bad ways with others but when others do the same thing then they are hurt and feel irritated. So whenever we are misbehaving with others we must think that how we will react if other people are behaving with us in the same manner. What are your views on this?
  • #755096
    Whatever has been written by Umesh Sir in this thread is very apt. We expect humility from others but we ourselves don't remember this trait while we interact with others. If this continues, the other party will also reciprocates in similar manner and would interact with us in a terrible manner.
    However, most Indians don't learn this good trait from the elders in the family. We don't emulate the examples set by the elders in the family, in fact we ignore them till such time we ourselves suffer from being impolite to others.

    “Khamosh rahoon toh mushkil hain, keh doon toh shikayat hoti hain" (It is difficult to remain silent; But if I speak, they complain.) --------- Saba Afghani

  • #755099
    Our living is confronted with stress and short comings and we have been facing challenges of varied kinds and therefore cannot remain cool even with those who are polite to us and expect our same degree of reciprocation. I think the timing of talking and with others and the place matters wherein people tend to give their varied feelings best known to them. For example a father may be a cool person in the home but he has to be strict at the company where his daughter or son is also working and cannot be with take it easy attitude. Surely he would fume at his own children if something wrong done to which there cannot be feelings. However it does matter for every human beings that we expect basic courtesy of at least a smile while entering a house for the first time and if all of them are putting angry face, we may like to leave instantly.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #755108
    That is true. Many people are like this these days. They never understand that the distance between two houses will be the same either way. I will shout at you but you be soft on me. How long this attitude will go on well?
    Gandhiji used to show the other side when somebody is slapping him on one side. This is what we read. But how can we follow that when somebody is always wanted to take it as an advantage?
    Respecting each either and showing politeness always should be followed by all. But Young people are not having that much patience and they will shout and scream at the elders if they train to explain anything to them, But they never like to hear even a hard word from the elders. These days elders are not able to express anything to the next generation of people.

    always confident

  • #755136
    Super point raised by the author. He pictured the mentality of many in a simple way. In one book A G Gardner, a famous writer wrote in one of his articles, that many people do not utter thanks or even the politeness to the lift man when going up or down, They simply tell the floor number only without a please or thanks. This he wrote many years before but the present people strictly follows this and they expect respect or politeness from others towards them but they do not follow the same in their practice. This just depicts their ego and head weight.

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