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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    How to deal with self-centred or selfish people?

    In our day to day life, we come across many people with varying personality traits or characteristics. Often, a few of them are found to be totally selfish after some time. Not only that, in our own private social circle consisting of family members, relatives and friends, there may be people who are totally selfish but we have no option left but to somehow manage with them.

    The idea behind raising this thread is to share our experiences about strategies to be adopted in dealing with selfish people. Is it possible to stop interacting with them totally? What if they are our close relatives or boss at the workplace?

    Have you ever come across a selfish person? How do identify such persons and maintain relationships with them, if unavoidable?
  • #755769
    When you find out that the person is concerned only with her/his own wellbeing and pleasures with no regard for the others then it is better to leave the person in that way. They can be identified from their acts and they will never mind whether you keep in touch with them or not because even if you do not keep in touch with them they will contact you when they require your assistance in any case. Sometimes, it may not be possible to stop interacting with such persons if they are somehow closely associated with your daily activities but you need to be cautious of them. Such persons in the workplace may not be very helpful and at the same time, you cannot make the person annoyed because there is every chance of developing animosity in that case. Limiting your interactions with such persons is the best way. For any task, if assistance is required from such persons ask for their suggestions tactfully without letting the person know that you need their assistance.

    "Life is easier when you enjoy what you do"

  • #755774
    This is again a good post to discuss. From my personal experience and what I am practicing that never give any credence and importance to those who are self centered and selfish to the core. I have seen that these people maintain social distance and have lots of ego that they are the best and others are the worst. They prevail on the opposite persons that they are more informed and knowledgeable than others. And they come calling for help from us even at the midnight. When they are good and well placed, they would never care others not even inquire about the health or welfare of known people and when they are in problems and want to seek help from others they would heap praise to which other person would succumb to their praising which was not coming these days. So keep away from such persons.
    K Mohan
    'Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum "
    Even this challenging situation would ease

  • #755783
    Many parents nowadays say that their adult children do not understand how much they have worked for them. "They are very selfish, greedy, and self-centered." Although they have brought up their children with selflessness and generosity. But the search revealed in many cases that his children live abroad or out of home town for a living. So even if they want to, many times they can't see or hear from their parents. Since the mother is not getting close to her boy, she feels that her children are not watching her. Such incidents are happening a lot in today's society. In my opinion, these can not be treated as selfishness. In another area, there is no shortage of selfish people in society. There are selfish people who live around you, try to convince them first, otherwise, it is better to keep a distance from them. Stay away from confusing them with your personal matters and stay well.
    Believe in the existence of God the superpower.

  • #755800
    As mentioned by the author all human beings are to interact with different types of people and move with them. Some may be helpful. some may be cooperative and some may be selfish. If it is just friendship we can say we will not be friends with selfish people. We will study the people carefully and after confirming that we can be friends with them, we can go for friendship with him. If some relatives or neighbours are selfish we may avoid them and we may keep a distance from them. But colleagues and officers can't be selected by us. We have to manage with them and see that our work will not get hampered because of them.
    These selfish people project as if all the good works are done by them and they may show that all failures are because of other people. So whatever interactions we have with such people, all should be on record and anytime reference is required we can so these records. Instead of depending on oral communication, it is better to keep everything on paper so that tomorrow nobody can say that we have not informed as required to the other person.

    always confident

  • #755823
    There are many people in this world who are very selfish and can go to any extent to fullfill their needs. If required they can even cheat others to get advantage out of it. It is true that everyone is not like that but how can we identify one from other when most of them initially behave in the same way. We come to know about a selfish person after sometime and in many cases by that time the harm is already done to us. So it becomes necessary to identify and isolate these people in the beginning itself and then disconnect with them as early as possible. One thing which is helpful in this matter is that generally the reputation of selfish people is not good and many of our friends and relatives we tell about them to us and we should be careful if they approach to us for something important or some work.
    Knowledge is power.

  • #755824
    This is a topic discussed very often in the forum section. Titles may differ but the subject is the same. How to deal with selfish people is answered by you in the first paragraph itself. It is mentioned that there is no option left but to somehow manage with them.
    Every person is selfish to some extent or other. As long as their selfishness is not harmful, better leave them alone and try to manage somehow when it becomes necessary. Identify such people and be careful in dealing with them. Try to lecture on the virtues of service above self whenever possible.

    " Be Good and Do Good "

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