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  • Category: Miscellaneous

    What to do with compulsive talkers?

    It is a train journey that takes exactly 90 minutes. However, the express train was already running late and it took 110 minutes. The neighboring passenger started with enquiries about the station from which I boarded the train. Since my seat was reserved, there were no issues.

    However, the 45 something gentleman went on talking about everything in the world. I was at a loss to understand how I could somehow avoid him. He was such a big bore that I tried opening up with someone else. But he would not allow that gentleman to go away. As our luck would have it, he aligted at the penultimate stop.

    Life is full of strangers. And compulsive talkers. I shudder to think what would happen if I were to see someone like him.
  • #767562
    Compulsive talker? Or was it a compulsive listener? The person in question must have had his reasons to engage with someone. I am sure that you have not been a silent listener. You must have asked him questions. And, though you have a reserved berth, you could have very well moved away or could have taken some measures to indicate that you are not interested. Was any attempt in that direction made?
    'Knowledge is knowing a Tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.' -Miles Kington

  • #767564
    It is very rare to see any person without talkin with others during train or bus journey. Sometimes, it is benefit to us also. A situation in such way happened to me. Once I went to Trichy on my office work. But since it was happening our wedding anniversary day amidst my tour itinerary, with the permission of my boss, I took my wife with me. We have planned to split my personal expenses from office one. As I used to stay in Lodge, we stayed in a lodge. On the previous day of our wedding anniversary day, we went to our relative's house in Trichy. Our aunt told us to visit a famous temple at Siruvachur, on the way to Perambalur from Trichy, further she told me that the temple get opened on selective days, there might be over crowded. we board a bus wherein three seats together. Third seat was occupied by a senior person boarded later. He was casually talking with me, we told about our program and enquired about the probable crowd as he found as local person. He amidst his talking told the place where to get down and suggested to meet on person on the way to temple and further told he was the sarpanch of that area. Accordingly we met the person on the way to temple and on telling his name, he took us to the temple and facilitate very much for a good darshan amidst a huge crowd. We told thanks mentally to that person and God for a great darshan.

  • #767568
    I think the author is talking about people who go on talking irrespective of the mood of the other people. That means he is making others hear his words.
    Once on my train journey, I met a person who is talking very freely about various subjects. Some people are listening to him very carefully. I was not very much interested. Then I opened my laptop and started working on that. I never participated in the discussion. After some time slowly one by one went to sleep and the other person is having no option and kept silent. In my opinion, nobody can make us listen if we are not really interested. Somebody may talk continuously, but when he notices that nobody is listening to him, he will have to stop talking.
    On a train journey, we will meet different types of people some experiences may be good and some may not be.

    drrao
    always confident

  • #767570
    As it was a short journey, the chat by the co-passenger was a bore to the author. But what about a long journey - say that of more than 24 hours or even two nights and a day which many times we may had to take?
    That time we would feel bored when n one talks to us.

    Some people, sometimes overdo things and they may not allow the other people to talk. But even then if we are able to put some questions to them and ask some personal queries about them similar to what they ask us, then they may sop or make it a two way enjoyable talk.
    To admit frankly, I had enjoyed the talk with co-passengers in travel, though generally I am not that extrovert. It all boils to some context and situation developing and then the person whom we would have ben observing secretly with some doubt and hesitation would turn out to be an interesting person and we would have got a new friend or acquaintance.
    I had got some very good general knowledge from such conversations. It was quite interesting to undertake long train travel. By the time we alighted at destination we would have got a few telephone numbers or addresses of co-passengers, some of them would become continuing contacts and friends. I have gained much from such conversations from c-passengers in many journeys. Some others would have gained from m also.

    But now mostly we can see people just plug their ears with earphone or headphone, lie on the births disregarding others' inconvenience and play with their mobile phones sometimes making some weird noises of laugh and some voice chatting with someone somewhen. Each one now feels the other is a bore and just shut out themselves in their own virtual world.

  • #767582
    What the author has indicated in his thread is true but not always. Such incidents are not common during the train journeys when someone would look for some people interested to listen to him. Once we are paying attention to what he says with our attentiveness, he might be free in his one sided conversation. If we are no more interested to share with his continuous talks, there are other practical ways. Glueing over laptop or mobile phone might provide us rescue. Alternatively we may carry books of our interest and proceed with that one. Finally one sided talk will ultimately terminate.

  • #767609
    For compulsory talkers regarding strangers, we must understand their body language, and their purpose of travelling, as he or she travels alone. If all these criteria are to our satisfaction, we talk about general things with them. There are situations when other travellers may overhear our conversation, so there is a scope of problems that may be created by this.

    I used to travel regularly' first of all I study my co-passengers to the best of my knowledge, and I decide what to talk and what should not be talked about. Then only I do close probing.

    I never allow strangers to talk freely.


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