Category: General

27 Apr 2024 08:07

Joined:	20/04/2018
Level:	Gold
Points:	55757

Points:	5

Reducing anxiety of parents, systematically

Almost end of April and the examinations are over. Parents, at least in Tamil Nadu, have already started showing signs of restlessness. There are parents who regularly grill their children, asking them if they had done no mistake at all, guaranteeing the 100 percent marks in each of the core subjects that would serve as a passport to a good engineering college education.

The NEET examination coaching is another racket, ramifications of which are well-known. This causes huge anxiety to a vast majority of parents.

Except for a few parents who know that they should never ever impose their will on their children, almost 98 per cent of parents follow the herd mentality. Why are we not doing enough to even understand that there are too many choices for children, and that the New Education Policy has made it even easier now, than ever before?

The CBSE and the State Board teachers need to be systematically trained to become counselors, of even parents, even when the student is in the sixth standard. Opening up new channels of communication will help a great deal in reducing all anxiety. It does not serve any purpose, if parents have restlessness and make the children anxious to the maximum degree.

We need to do something in this regard.

#778814

27 Apr 2024 10:53

Joined:	02/06/2009
Level:	Diamond
Points:	145594

Points:	5

A good thread from the author. The expectations of parents are very high these days.
A known person's son completed B Tech and got a job in an MNC with a package of Rs.4/- lakhs per annum. I congratulated him. That person says that he is not happy. He says that he expected a very good job with a package of at least Rs.20/- lakhs per annum. That speaks about the expectations they have from their children. I told him that we should be happy that we got a placement and slowly with experience they will get good jobs.
Many parents want their children to get into IITs only. Anything less than that is not an achievement in their thinking. I never had such expectations from my both sons. But today both of them are doing good and settled well drawing good salaries that are better than many of their classmates. It is very bad to impose our aspirations on our children and making them restless.

drrao
always confident

#778822

27 Apr 2024 15:00

Joined:	20/01/2017
Level:	Diamond
Points:	25422

Points:	5

I think there is too much competition nowadays for making a career and parents are very much involved in that process and monitoring each and every movement of the children in that direction.
Parents are only thinking of big jobs offered by multi national companies to the toppers in the respective campuses or thinking that their children will become doctor or engineer or civil servants.
No parent is going to accept the fact that if the child is not academically brilliant then they should not create pressure on him to attain the impossible and simply guide him to do some technical diploma or certificate and make a living. Even the child can explore business opportunities instead of worrying for a job.
Instead of worrying they should realise the harsh realities of the present competitive times and guide the students in other channels where they have interest and inclination. Eventually that only will provide livelihood in their lives.

Thoughts exchanged is knowledge gained.

#778823

27 Apr 2024 16:57

Joined:	10/12/2016
Level:	Diamond
Points:	109190

Points:	5

I remember my father used to tell me that he was the one rare person from our village who was able to get a small job during Britisher's regime in our country. That was possible because he could do his SSC successfully inspite of poverty and many other odds in his life. The whole village was excited on his success and it was something of great value at that time. Most of the villagers depended on the agriculture and a few who knew Sanskrit and religious rituals worked as priests.
At that time no parent was worried about the career of their children. It was known beforehand that they had to do agricultural work in the fields and the annual crop was the only resource they had. If they wanted to buy something then they used to do it through barter system giving grains in exchange for some item or service.
Today, we are living in a world where everyone is aspiring for a job and severe and stiff competition is there. So parents have full focus and concentration for that and even a small dip in the percentage of the child can bring sad lines on their faces.
Until and unless people start thinking of self employment opportunities and getting satisfied with the job as commensurate with their qualifications and merit, this situation would not change. I do not see a way in present circumstances to help parents get rid of these worries.

Knowledge is power.

#778824

27 Apr 2024 17:10

Joined:	25/11/2014
Level:	Diamond
Points:	43292

Points:	5

It is a relevant post from the author's side. We always remain under stress that our children will not be faring well in the upcoming examinations. They need guidance always to excel in their competition - be it a medical profession or otherwise. The net result is that due to excess interference, they lack confidence in preparing for their examinations.
Even having a clear conception of a chapter will not please the parents or guardians, they do have some specific instructions to be followed by way of preparation.
Such guidance cannot be said to be the form of motivation but this could upset their career. Preparation with the calm mood with the formulation of their own planning is the only way to achieve success.
Lastly, we have observed that the candidates having cleared their interviews with a multinational company are not appreciated by their parents since other colleagues are enjoying better perks than their own wards. Let us not try to demoralise our own children always. We must listen to them patiently and lastly we might offer them a brief comment how their planning can be made more effective.

#778826

27 Apr 2024 17:52

Joined:	02/06/2009
Level:	Diamond
Points:	145594

Points:	4

Parents should understand the capabilities of their children and their expectations should be within that. But the exceptions are mounting Everest and pressuring their wards to reach their expectations. That is causing unnecessary stress and anxiety to these children. That is why we are hearing about suicides by students. Very unfortunate.
Everybody in the nation can't become Prime Ministers. Why parents are forgetting this simple logic?
Let the children enjoy their childhood. Let us not create a nightmare to them by asking them top ranks in education and top jobs in top MNCs.

drrao
always confident

#778846

28 Apr 2024 15:59

Joined:	02/01/2012
Level:	Gold
Points:	51633

Points:	5

I think it is quite natural for parents to be anxious about the future of their child. But it is when the anxiety crosses the limit and moves into the dangerous field of psychological stress and fear that it calls for some counselling. It is an irony that it is the same parents who blame their kids for being immature who fall for such uncalled-for acts of immaturity. Parents need to be worried if their kids are straying off the right path but as long as they are well-planned and knows what they want, I don't understand why one should be so anxious as to disturb one's peace of mind as well as that of the family. I do agree that there is a herd mentality prevalent in the society and if need be, as suggested by the author, let the topic be made a part of the agenda in all parent-teachers meetings in schools to create a general awareness among the parents about their limited role in deciding the future course a student should follow.

'Educating the mind without educating the heart is no education at all'.
-Aristotle

Reducing anxiety of parents, systematically

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