How To Overcome Fear While Proposing?

This is the most common thing that will happen while you try to propose a girl for love or for marriage. In this article i will share my ideas to overcome this fear. I advise not to depend fully on it and to give a thinking before attempting anything as it involves your life.

When does this Proposing fear start?

Everything will be normal until the last moment. For most people the problem occurs when they were about to open their mouth to propose. Some will even feel shaky. Instead of saying I Love You, people will say the "I" alone for more than 10 times.

Why do we have this Proposing fear?

There are two reasons for which we have this fear. The first one , for example , a boy sees a girl, and he falls for her the moment he sees her. He will try to approach the girl. Now there are two choices for him.

1. To approach as a friend.
2. To try and approach as liking her.

The first approach is easy but it requires a next approach as turning from friend to lover and it gives some more fear, the fear that you may lose your friendship to her. This fear also stands for those who fall in love with their best friends.

Whereas the second approach is little bit difficult, but it will give people more confidence. But here you will have this fear in the beginning of the approach, as we all know, 1st impression is the best impression and no one will want to ruin that first impression. If you are seen as an irritating guy at first, no matter what you do, you will be that irritating character forever.

How to overcome this Proposing fear?

Unfortunately, there is no chance of overcoming this fear. I think it is human nature to have this fear. But that does not mean, there is no other way. There are ways to hide this fear. Mostly the first approach will have more fear, as many people will decide to give up their proposing idea and stay as a friend forever instead. So what you should do to succeed here is you should try and ask them indirectly, or ask them directly and if things go seriously just say "cool down, i was just being funny". At this point she may get a dout, that you may be in love with her.

The second thing is that after this they will go and ask their friends for suggestions. This is where you have to act smart, and get those friends on your side and get the needed info about what she is thinking about you. This will be very helpful.

For the second approach, you have to be very carefull. You should actually start by helping her out , talking to her, but you should not go into that friendship circle. Stay outside, go around the circle until she likes you. Then start asking her out. If you are succeeded upto this , you can easily handle the rest.

Don't lose your focus to other girls. If they find that out, you may lose them forever. Keep it in mind. All the BEST.


Author: sakthivel19 Mar 2011 Member Level: Silver   Points : 1

Hi Shanmuga Sundara Pandian,
It is a difficult task to propose a girl. Many factors to be considered before proposing her.
1. She must not be committed to anyone.
2. we should know her likes and unlike.
3. She may shout at the person if she doesn't like that person.
So, considering various factors we should plant accordingly.

Our proposal can be planned in such a way that is creative. She would never have heard about the way the person proposing her in films or from her friends. She should wonder about the person who proposed her. She should never forget such a proposal in her life. This will be a positive chance for the person to committed to that girl.
Eg: Design a greeting card for her birthday with her name printed in that card saying I never miss you my friend.

Thanks and regards

Author: Shanmuga Sundara Pandian19 Mar 2011 Member Level: Silver   Points : 1

Hi Mr.Shakthivel,

Thanks for responding so soon to my post and i am very happy to see your response. You are right, the first thing to do is to find out if the girl is single. Otherwise there is no use in following all the steps and ideas that are mentioned above.


Author: SuN28 Dec 2013 Member Level: Platinum   Points : 3

It is like aiming your gun to shoot at the centre of the target. At times, even with very good aim, we are likely to miss the target. Before using a real gun, we should always practice with a dummy gun. I recommend your first fast . approach followed by the slow second approach. But before proposing, we should ensure our personality match and study whether this will be a fit or misfit. I love your simple article for proposal.

Guest Author: VIJENDRA KUMAR21 Jun 2014

I'm loving a girl but I don't know that she loves me or not. so please tell me how to get know that she love's me or not. Please do fast I'm very disjointed now.

Author: Ritesh Nishar08 Jul 2014 Member Level: Gold   Points : 4

I have never thought about this so much but I don't think there should be any fear because you are proposing someone and not murdering. If its a yes from her side then all good but if its no then move on. Thinking a lot about whats there in her mind will bother you and you will not concentrate on your work too. Let me tell you it is said that till date no one understood a woman. So don't get into all these things that why she said no or whats there in her mind. There should not be any fear in this. Anyways good tips for those who have fear before proposing.

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