The reaction to planning to study abroad A student studying in class XII comes home from school one afternoon and declares to his mother that he would be going abroad for higher studies. When the father comes home from work in the evening, he is astound to hear his son's future plans. The parents wonder if their son loves them no more. They begin to get anxious and worried. They are so shocked that they deny their son any permission to leave the country. This is not a singular incident and the nervousness of the parents is completely understandable. While some fears are justified others are completely illogical and baseless. However, not all parents seem to be petrified by their children's decision to go abroad. They readily agree to let their children go to a different country for higher studies and even help them find a suitable college. The dilemma of parents of not being able to decide whether to send their kids abroad or not will always be there.
What worries parents Every parent has his or her own reasons to worry about one of their kids going to study abroad. While some reasons are related to the kid's progress others are selfish. Some fear about their kids because the children have never been on their own at any point of their lives while others fear about their children never coming back to take care of them in old age. However, some fears are common to all the parents who support or do not support their children going to a foreign land. Some of the common reasons are given below.
The cost of studying abroad Not everyone is a millionaire and not everyone can afford to send their children abroad to study. Parents who do not have the money have to be on their toes and take every possible step to collect money for their adamant and promising son. While they try everything to send their kid to study abroad they always have a question at the back of their minds, 'Is it worth it?' This question is applicable to students hailing from rich families too. Money plays a very important role in choosing various courses and universities too. Moreover, some countries are more affordable while others are too exorbitant for a common man's wallet.
The parents as well as the students have to research and spend some time on checking for various courses, the cost of studying and amount of scholarships available. They can then select the university to study accordingly. Getting hold of scholarships can make it real easy for the parents. There are many scholarships for international students often available in the host countries.
Will they ever come back The dilemma of not knowing whether the students who go to study abroad will ever come back has resulted in uncountable sleepless nights for parents. Their fears are realistic because they have known and seen their friends and elders whose children have never come back. While many send money home after settling abroad, many do not even call occasionally. However, a kid coming back home as a matured person or not coming back at all depends on the values and principles he lives by. He cannot be forced or coaxed to do something which he does not care about. One of the sad facts of sending kids abroad is that they seem to like the life there and tend to just stay there in spite of their visa expiring. However, the other great fact is that they do come back and work in their native country with more patriotism than anyone alive.
Parents have to live with the fact that anything can happen but they have to be optimistic. By fearing that their son might not be their when they are old and gray to help them, they do not get the right to curb their son's freedom and the will to study abroad.
How safe is studying abroad For parents who shudder every time their son sneezes, it literally becomes a huge mountain to surmount when deciding to send their children abroad to study and pursue a career. It is normal for a parent to feel apprehensive of sending his kid to a foreign city on his own with all the freedom in the world. It is true that some cities have high crime rates and it is also true that racism still exists in many parts of the developed as well as the developing world. However, parents have to understand that one cannot always keep his children in a protective cocoon. They have to learn to face the realities of life one way or another. Keeping them under a canopy of falsehood will never work. Life has never been easy for a prince or a pauper and neither will your kid make it through easily. One day you will be proud when you see your beloved child emerge a winner through all the ordeals and struggles. There are many study abroad consultants in India who can help you find safe places to study in foreign countries.
It will not be easy at home too A lot of parents believe that it will be a lot easier for their children to study in the country they belong and deny permission to them to go abroad to study. It is true that the parents may feel that their children are in safe hands but the decision may backfire when the kids start blaming their parents of ruining their their lives and for failure. The youth of today knows what they are doing and where they are going. They must be rendered the responsibility as well as accountability. It is not only the parents but students too who face the dilemma of a future worth reckoning. Not all the decisions come out with flying colors but chances have to be taken. There is no use of allowing your child to study in your country in a less than average school or university. For example, in India quality education is not accessible to everyone owing to the cut-throat competition in the field of education with limited number of good and global colleges. To add to the misery, the system of reservation has left many capable and deserving candidates out of the race which gives them the only option of going to study abroad. A decent foreign degree and exposure is definitely better than a degree from an average domestic university.
Parents must learn to take it easy It is but natural to enter into a dilemma mode and wonder whether sending your children abroad will be the best option or not, however, weighing all the pros and cons it would be wise enough for students to go abroad provided they are not able to get admission to the prestigious domestic college they prefer. I know that there are chances of kids getting into wrong groups and gangs, that might also land into trouble but is your country insulated from these troubles? As kids grow up it is best to give them the space and freedom so that they learn to live life on their own terms.
Can we have some tips about how to convince them
Here are some tips on how to convince them:
First just talk to them and understand their concerns. I am sure many of those concerns are genuine from their point of view. I am not taking sides of parents, even though I am also a parent. Now list each of their concerns and prepare a detailed justification, which will answer their concern. Only after this whole exercise is done, you can have a heart to heart chat with both together. Listen to them, and request them to listen to you. Slowly they will understand your urge, desire and passion, let this be seen in the discussion. If you are able to justify every concern, they will gradually loosen up and subsequently accept what you have to say. You never know if they have been biased after hearing from others or from their parents. Give them time, give them some details and show the pros. A positive mindset will soon emerge.
Then I can say: Bon voyage and all the best!
Good article about whether studying abroad is really safe or not.
My considered opinion about the subject matter is that the students who have performed well as evidenced from their existing academic performance record should not be restrained from pursuing higher studies abroad. It is never wise to spend most of the savings for sending an average student for studying abroa just for the heck of it. Brilliant students with outstanding academic records are generally able to get some kind of financial assistance also and therefore the net cost of their studies works out to be much more affordable. Moreover such students should be sent to developed countries only in reputed universities instead of in any university on the strenght of the parents wealth/savings.
Most of the students who go to US for higher studies generally don't come back. As far as the fears about racial discrimination, crime etc. is concerned, the best possible efforts can be mase at the time of selecting country/university. The motivated students are generally able to adjust themselves in the changed scenario and become self reliant in due course.
I just cannot understand as to why the students and parents are just following the herd and not consulting their own conscience in deciding over the fact about going abroad and studying there? I have seen some parents, coming under the pressure of their child, sell properties, take heavy loan from the banks and even mortgage gold for the purpose of sending the child abroad for higher studies. I doubt that after studying there, there is no strong assurance or guarantee that a good fetching job could be available given the volatile situation as of today where in every country wants to give preference of jobs to their citizens first and remaining to the next. In that case, what is the use of going abroad by spending huge money and getting nothing in return. We have good universities and colleges with good recruiting campus placements and thus every educated student has the best chance to get best job here in India itself.