Should family matters be kept confidential?

This article is a debate - whether secrecy should be maintained with family matters. Different families follow different cultures and they feel that their way of thinking is right. Both the cultures can follow their ways by leading a good life.

Usually in collectivist culture, a husband is always considered as a God by woman. Some cultures even state that a woman should bear any type of torment imposed by her husband. Some woman even keep their mouth shut if their husbands marry another husband. Some in-laws strictly instruct their daughter in-law not to speak anything negative about the family in the light of the public or when somebody visits the house. So, in this way the daughter-in-law feels pressurized.

Consequences of always maintaining secrecy in collective society

The families always want to maintain the status in the society. So, they want to hide every negative aspect of their house. Sometimes, the daughter-in-laws are tormented in the house and they are pressurized to keep it secret. The woman began to feel pressurized and they become oppressed. In this way, are not the families hiding the ugly truth of the families. Some daughter-in-laws due to utter suppression one day even attempt suicide.

In most of the households, the daughter-in-laws if they hail from inferior background are always taunted by the in-laws and even husbands constantly. Such women do not have the space to express their opinion to anybody and they lose their intellect. So what will the society gain here by destroyed the hidden talents of woman?

A woman should be taught to maintain secrecy of the family, but to a certain extent. A woman should obviously maintain financial secrecy because the wealth of the family should be preserved. Even the frivolous issues that take place in the house should not be declared to the family because a woman can easily lose respect by speaking something non-sense. She should not announce the weakness of the families and should not complain to the public or anyone if she is experiencing financial crisis. A woman is a member of a family and she should maintain secrecy of the following factors to uplift the family. If she uplifts the family, then the society will uplift a woman.

But the families should not take any advantage of the concept of secrecy. If any action that is being undertaken on a woman is leading to her loss of beauty and intellect, then why should she keep shut? Yes, she can lose beauty by performing labor for her family when the family desperately needs it. She may quit the job if the family requires her desperately, but a family should not snatch away her beauty and intellect due to their utter egoism and lust for respect in the society. If they want to maintain status in the society, then they should first pay respect to the woman in the house.

Culture of secrecy in individualist society

Usually, in liberal society, men and women are both expressive and frank. Such societies usually discuss about the problems openly in a social circle. They do not want to suppress anybody in the society. But men and women should both open their true thoughts and opinions to each other every-time. But, in the process of discussing such matters in a social circle, some persons may attempt to spoil the relationship of the couple. They should be aware of these factors and the social circles of such societies should be loyal to each other every time so that they remain friends forever.

If the social circles listen to each other's 'problems and try to solve them by paying utter co-operation to each other, then the people of such societies will always remain happy.

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Author: Kailash Kumar13 Jun 2016 Member Level: Platinum   Points : 5

Family is a distinctive unit of the society, a group of close knit individuals related through blood or marriages. Therefore it is quite likely that the outsiders may not be interested in the concerns and issues of a family. Because of this reason, it is never advisable to share all family information with outsiders. However within the family, all important information should be shared among the family members depending upon their age groups and maturity level. In nuclear families residing away from their native place where other members of the family reside, it become more relevant to share all information related to the family wealth with the spouse. Ideally there should not be any secret between spouses regarding bank accounts, investments, share in ancestral property and jewelry etc. Also proper nominations should be made and as far as possible all investment etc should be made in joint name.

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