Is Mother not an icon of sacrifice today?

The role and tendencies of a mother is changed due to advent of new technology and desire to remain an individualist. Some cases reveal that a mother is not willing to sacrifice for her own child in some aspects.

Recently, two intense issues about mothers are publicized to reveal to the public that a mother is not playing a sacred role to her child, but has become even abusive. Of course! not all mothers are abusive and many mothers even today play a sacred role, but the rate of frustrated mothers is increasing day by day. Women have learned to be individualists and want to enjoy every step of their life by following their passions and spending some time relaxing or having refreshments. They feel interrupted when they have to play a duty at this moment. But they should remember the love and care the child requires at this moment.

Two major cases to show that the mother of today is not a symbol of sacrifice

Recently, a mother abandoned her child in the lonely areas of jungles as her ex-husband was frustrated with the cries of the infant. So, this woman was arrested by the state police.

A woman threw away her two-year old sleeping son from the second floor to the first floor as she become frustrated fighting with her in-laws. The child experienced head injuries and was hospitalized.

These two cases have indeed stunned the public and one fine day, no child can believe his or her own mother. Only mother can sacrifice enjoyment and happiness for the child. If the mother is not willing to serve the child, then the child feels lonely and dejected.

The role of mother yesterday and today

In the yesteryears, a mother gave up her career and enjoyment to bring up her children. They did not even eat food on time nor slept for nights together to take care of infants. Even today, many mothers give up sleeping or food to take care of their children, but get frustrated at a point of time. They are always grumbling that they cannot find time for enjoyment. Just few mothers, maintain a smile on their face and hide their issues. Today, due to advancement in technologies, a mother need not perform laborious tasks like the mothers of the yester-years, but yet mothers want to allocate time for themselves. In the yester-years, father was considered as a strict figure in the family and mother was considered as somebody who is compassionate as God.

Many women today are beauty conscious and hence they feel disheartened when they touch their skin and feel that they have lost the texture due to constant physical work. The woman in the yester-years did not even care about their looks.

Most of the woman discuss the following issues when they meet their friends:

" I am waiting when my child becomes two years old, so that he or she can join playgroup, so that I can get ample time to complete my work and engage in my hobbies"

"When my child reaches five years, he or she can attend full-time school and my life becomes relaxed"

"I cannot go for shopping with my children and hence today I will not prepare dinner but enjoy shopping"

"My child is always stubborn, unlike the other kids and hence I cannot remain relaxed, why is my child not like the others"

Why did they not think before they planned for a child? If they do not love to commit to their duty towards their children, then why did they bring their children to this world?

Become mother when you are prepared

A mother should be willing to give up sleeping or eating delicious food until the child is grown-up. Do not dream for the child to grow-up or imagine a day when your child is stepped in school and you are free. Just think of the present and always use creative methods to raise your children in a proper way.

If you want to earn money and improve your lifestyle, then learn to manage time. Perform such tasks or that can be performed at home and perform whenever your child is sleeping. Do not expect other people to assist you and make your life better so that you can find time for enjoyment. Some mothers fight with their in-laws to take care of the child and when they do not get proper response, then they enter into fights.

If you strive for your children and help them grow in a proper way, then in the future, you can experience happiness and your life becomes a heaven.


Author: Partha K.04 Mar 2017 Member Level: Platinum   Points : 8

An excellently written article on motherhood, which has become very relevant in modern-day India. In earlier days, mothers sacrificed everything for the sake of their children. My mother left her teaching profession to look after three of us. Even today, most of the Indian mothers sacrifice and suffer a lot smilingly and willingly for the upbringing of their children and also for the greater cause of the family.
But there are some exceptions also. And these exceptions are making more news today. Some of the working ladies have become very career-conscious and they can't maintain a balance between their professional duties and their family responsibility. This is the main reason for the unfortunate events some of which the author has narrated. Moreover, due to small family system, the working ladies don't get proper moral support at the time emergencies or crises. I have seen that in many small families where both husband and wife work, a lot of problem arises even when their baby suffers from cough and cold or mild fever. They quarrel to decide who will skip office to look after the ailing child.
In the complex scenario, it is not that easy to blame working ladies for neglecting their children. As a result of these problems, many working ladies nowadays consciously decide not to marry or to remain child-less.

Author: Juana06 Mar 2017 Member Level: Platinum   Points : 9

What a morbid picture you paint.

Motherhood in no way means the end of life and dreams and aspirations. A healthy balance has to be maintained. The comparison between mothers’ of the past and the present generation is not that of equals. Today’s woman has educated which her counterpart wasn’t.

The two incidents illustrated in the article do not represent the entire woman population. They were freak incidents, the women might be suffering from psychological issues. Let’s not paint an entire people based on how some people behave.

Women abandoned their children earlier too – that is why there were orphanages. Women killed their newborn baby’s that is why there is the talk of infanticide.

Women in the past had nowhere to go, there were no opportunities available to them. Women today have much going for them. Let’s not grudge them their freedom. What’s the harm if a woman wants her child to start playschool so she can find time for herself? Can we not look at it in a positive way?

Motherhood is not about sacrificing alone. I do not understand the concept of giving up ‘delicious food’ until the child has grown up. Motherhood is not a punishment. Agree, mothers must be willing to make sacrifices, but to expect them to bury all their dreams and not make mention of them is too stringent. I think mothers today are doing a perfect balance.

Also, note that parenthood is a JOINT responsibility. Two people bring a child into the world. The father is and should be equally responsible for the children he fathers. Women are not child producing and child rearing machines.

Also, in-laws are a child’s grandparents and if they are living with their son and daughter-in-law then they are duty bound to help. Marriage and motherhood do not make a woman a slave. If they refuse to help with the child, they have no right demanding that they are cared for. It’s a family after all, and there should be harmony within its members and sharing of duties and responsibilities. Let's be realistic, and not expect women to behave like a character from a soap-opera!

Author: Swati Sarnobat07 Mar 2017 Member Level: Gold   Points : 7

In response to author Juana, I would state that I am not proving mothers of today as petrifying. In a sentence, I have clearly stated that 'All mothers are not abusive, but the rate of frustrated women is increasing'.

Those two cases that I have explained are extreme I agree as I wanted to prove that, out of frustration and egoism, to what extent a woman can neglect her child. I have also mentioned that a normal mother cares for her child, but most of them grumble. Every mother should be aware about the current happenings in the society pertaining to motherhood.

But, I forgot to mention one aspect of a woman. The transition of woman of today from being only a wife to a mother is difficult obviously because she is brought up with a lots of comfort and splendors. Earlier, even before marriage, women were taught to slog because soft gadgets and equipment were not launched and hence motherhood was easier for her. But now due to less physical work before motherhood and loads of work after motherhood makes a woman feel difficult. So, she should remember that until her child grows up, she should make some small sacrifices to keep her child happy.

Before being a mother, she should judge if she is able to undertake responsibility and I have briefly mentioned about planning also.

Author: Juana08 Mar 2017 Member Level: Platinum   Points : 12

Let me put it this way; the findings are not accurate, they are generalised statements based on limited information. I do not agree with the viewpoint that only a few mothers maintain a smile on their face. On what basis has the conclusion that most mothers grumble been drawn?

Mothers can never stop being caring. Love and compassion, for their offspring, is genetically imbued in them. Voicing an opinion doesn’t make a woman a bad mother. I see no wrong in someone wanting to look attractive after they have had a child. How does that make them bad mothers? What is wrong with mothers discussing wanting/waiting to send their children to play school/school? Why are they being judged? Can they not voice their views, without being labelled as bad mothers or unfit mothers?

Parenthood is a joint responsibility. I think mothers today are doing a brilliant job. For one they are multitasking. They still have the responsibility of running a home. They also find time to work and bring up children. They take an active part in their children’s life. How can anyone comment on when an adult must choose to have kids or question why they had kids? We cannot typecast and/or judge people based on what we think is right. This is so wrong.

You may argue that your article mentions “not all mothers are abusive”, but that doesn’t change the fact that the rest of the article is an analysis on how wretched most mothers today are. Let’s not create stereotype mothers, let’s not categorise them as good or bad based on our perception of right and wrong.

Women too have aspirations and dreams. They too want to live their lives. Wanting to do so does not make them bad mums. There is no scale that can measure a mother’s love. You point out only what you see and think to be true. You do not know what actually happens behind the scenes when no one is watching. Let’s salute mothers and motherhood. All mothers need a pat on their back, not a commentary on how they should be leading their lives. They should be celebrated instead of being portrayed as some kind of demon.

I am sorry I don't concur with your views.

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