IntroductionBeauty is a quality which has a very powerful effect on our self confidence. Our overall self confidence and self esteem automatically get boosted if we feel that we are beautiful. A variety of specific domains boost self esteem and beauty is one of them. This is the reason that if we do not feel that we are beautiful then confidence goes down immediately. Beauty is not just confined to our looks. Our physical appearance alone cannot determine whether we are beautiful or not. Our inner beauty too has a say in it. The way we carry ourselves and the way we display our strength too determine our standard of beauty.
Effect of beauty on confidenceIf we feel that we are beautiful then it instills in us a sense of confidence and we feel happy. If we are not happy the way we look then opposite becomes true. Lower the self confidence, more depressed we will seem to be. This will exert a very negative effect on our mood and increase our stress level. Life will then start seeming difficult to us and we will not be able to enjoy our life as well as all those daily events which we encounter in it. These are however far less extreme effects. Confidence can even lower down to such a level in extreme cases that flaws in our looks may restrict us from stepping outside of the house. We will start avoiding mingling with others, become cut off from the society and start living in total isolation. Unnecessary or too much thinking about looks will keep us house bound and thereby we will even start disliking our pictures getting clicked. Sometimes we may even undertake excessive grooming to get rid of flaws from our looks. We may even decide to undergo extensive surgical and non-surgical procedures which promise flawless look. More the anxiety level increases, sooner we become prone to chronic mental illnesses like social anxiety eating disorders, body dysmorphic disorders etc.
Regain strength to become confidentDresses, make-up, looks can make us look beautiful, but the most beautiful thing which we possess definitely does not have a definite shape or color. We can only sense it and the feeling itself creates the whole magic. It is definitely self confidence. Beauty is not just confined to skin. It is very important that we get comfortable with who actually we are. This is because our opinion is the one that matters the most. Trendy looks, day to day fashion, others opinions are all just myth. The most that matters is how we define ourselves. If we feel that we are beautiful then that is what makes us beautiful. We can some times observe that some of us who are extremely beautiful in appearance and looks might not feel the same and this is because of negative thinking. Some others might not be as beautiful but display lots of confidence and self esteem. The power we need to look beautiful actually comes from inner-strength to accept who we are and from the positive attitude of owning our body. Only a mentally tough person can believe in himself. That person does believe in his own hype and one who lacks this kind of build up usually ends up listening or believing in what others think of them.
Accept physiqueThe struggle between the overweight and the skinny individuals which has been going on since long time seems never ending. Simply comparing ourselves to others and feeling bad about our body will not lead us anywhere. It will only cause inferiority complex and thus first thing we need to do is stop comparing ourselves with others and in this way we will stop feeling bad about ourselves. We need to just kill that fat talk or skinny talk. Once acceptance comes, we get liberated and can clearly see the doors or options of opportunities standing in front of us. Once we accept our physique, we will take required actions which will help us to dissolve our weight in case if we are over weight or put on some kilos if we feel we are too skinny. We will then shift our focus from others to our target areas or overall body from where we need to put on or reduce weight.
Develop strength to accept physiqueIn absence of strength, accepting our body the way it is will seem absolutely impossible. We all deserve to feel beautiful, but most of the times we do not feel it cause when we look in the mirror, we see an image of ours which is not the image we have in our mind. Image which we have in mind want us to be leaner, fairer or younger version of ours. This is the reason that we do not feel comfortable in our own skin. If we hate the way we look then we are never going to get the positive results from it and thus we need to develop this inner strength which will help us achieve what we want. Strength changes mindset and as a result we start healing which in turn brings lots of confidence and increases self esteem and within no time positive changes start taking place in us. Strength is actually a drive force which will teach us to love, accept and treat ourselves and our physique in a better way and this is all very important because without embracing our present body, we are never going to reap the benefits out of it.
Qualities of beautyBeauty is not just a physical thing. It never was and never will be limited to our physical appearance. It is actually a little bit of both physical and psychological experience. Beauty can be actually defined or categorized on three qualities. One is genetics i.e., how do we look? Our appearance is mainly genetics and we have a very little say in it. Second quality is how do we actually carry ourselves i.e., how do we usually take care of our body, health and all the other things which we do to groom ourselves. Third quality is how do we feel about everything i.e., whether the feeling is positive or negative when it comes to our looks, physique, appearance etc. Beauty is based on these three qualities and what we usually do is that we define it merely on genetics. We have no power or control on genetics. But we definitely can control other two qualities like develop a positive self-regard as well as take care of ourselves in the best possible way. Mere presence of one quality cannot make a person look beautiful.
Confidence is beautifulWe need to be ourselves. When we are confident from inside and feel beautiful from inside, only then it gets reflected in our eyes. Our eyes with lots of conviction will reflect our inner strength as well as the passion which we possess. Once we become familiar with who we are and accept all our strengths, weaknesses, flaws etc i.e., once we become self-aware, we shut down to what media or others have to say. We know that we are beautiful and do not need others opinions to know about the same. We do not actually care or like that typical definition of beauty framed by society or media. If we go by definition framed by media or society then we are putting ourselves in hands of danger. We will never become contended and embrace ourselves cause we will never learn to appreciate ourselves. Based on height, weight, skin color, dresses, make-up, flawless skin etc is what definition of beauty is framed. We spend thousands on cosmetics and cosmetic surgery and this is all because of lack of confidence. Confidence itself is beautiful. On the other hand, vanity or insecurity is not beautiful. Each and every time we do not have to depend on others to validate us to know that we are beautiful. How we carry ourselves and how do we feel about ourselves is much more important than how do we look.
ConclusionBeauty which is external is not ever lasting. With age, it diminishes i.e., it always comes with an expiry date. Our genes are not really under our control and the way we look on outside is mainly our genetics. The way we carry ourselves and our positive self-regard are the two qualities which we can control. People who are beautiful from inside, having a high self-confidence and self-esteem are actually the most beautiful people in the world. If we love ourselves and accept the way we are then world will look beautiful to us. The confidence with which we carry ourselves and the self-regard as well as self-esteem which we develop within us will actually determine how beautiful we are in real sense.
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A very well written article – it is thorough and positive.
A lot of how we feel about our body, complexion and features stems from how others make us feel. By others, I mean well-meaning people around us – our mothers, sisters, aunts, grandmothers etc. I bring forth only the female perspective because they are the ones who are body shamed the most.
We would be comfortable with our swarthy complexion if only our mothers had loved us enough. I see mom's trying every possible remedy to lighten the skin tone of their daughters. It's not that they don't love their daughters, but they are more concerned with how society looks at beauty. I think the confidence that you speak of has to be ingrained in childhood. All of us must be made to feel beautiful irrespective of how dark we are or how broad our nose is. It is the little things that we are subjected to, quite inadvertently though, that actually make us insecure about our bodies. It is difficult to wipe away the years of being treated as a guinea pig for testing skin lightening production and weight loss diets and hair thickening products, and what have you.