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Why healthy discussions are essential in relationships?

This article explains how healthy discussions play an important role in building trust, love, compassion and comfort between couples. Open conversations increase potential for love and indicate that the bond between couple is very strong which will make their relationship grow stronger.


Thick discussions make relationship to grow stronger over time. Each and every one of us knows that passion is an essential ingredient to keep love ignited. If passion is dead then love too dies. To let the passion breed, couples need to bring out issues which bother them and solve them by conducting healthy discussions. On the other hand, if couples argue then they are ruining the whole arena as well as their relationships. It is very natural for two individuals to get involved in a debate. This is because though they are in a relationship, but still are two separate individuals. If debate or discussion is healthy then it will help couples to understand each other well as well as accept each other with the differences.

Need of healthy discussions in a relationship

Couples usually break up and marriages end in divorce and this is mainly because of communication problem. Lack of communication is an evil cause which destroys many relationships. Healthy discussions and healthy debates are never seen in weak relationships. Healthy open conversation is a sign of strong relationships. Issues or problems are a part of life and when two people are in a relationship then they need to solve these issues together. This can be done by calmly sitting down, discussing healthily, compromising and then increasing more comfort and peace in their relationships. Result of a healthy discussion is always positive. No way it is going to shake strong foundation of a relationship. It can only make relationship to grow stronger with period of time.

Discussions over various issues indicate that the couple cares about each other. Instead of walking away, they have chosen to battle it out by having healthy discussions which is a productive, constructive and beneficial way. There will be hurt, there will be anger, but discussions will heal them and find a way out. Couples who opt to discuss issues, actively seek a solution, which is nothing but a breakthrough. Sometimes either or both of the partners in a relationship are unable to express the problems and troubles they are facing. When they keep concealing the things then relationship weakens. Discussion is a nice way out to reveal all those feelings to the other partner, so that any issue or unwanted bothering thought which is lingering in the mind can be resolved immediately. It helps couples to communicate well with each other and in this way they start paying special attention to each other.

Discussions are not bad for relationship

Some couples believe that if they speak out loud about what is bothering them inside can very easily ruin their relationship with their partner as it is going to badly hurt their partner. This is however not true. If intentions are right then nothing wrong will take place. Discussion with a purpose is very essential and is very important. We all are aware with the inner psychological reactions that take place within us when we face a danger or threat. We usually fight or take a flight. All the organisms have been using this mechanism to evolve and adapt. One can either choose to fight and stand on the ground firmly or else can flee away. Decision is usually made on basis of whether the threat is worth enough to fight or just run. In relationships too, one needs to make decisions. If the relationships are worth fighting for then couples need to take stand and if they are not worth fighting for then couples can walk away and conceal all their thoughts and emotions. If couples want their relationships to blossom then they have to push aside all those desires of not communicating with each other, which often lingers in their conscious as well as subconscious minds. They need to sit down calmly, express to each other everything that is bothering them and try to seek a solution by having healthy discussions. Unresolved issues poisons relationship. How can one hold on to poison by drinking it and then expect the other person to die? Issues therefore can only be resolved if they are discussed well. Every time we cannot expect other person to understand the issues without having a meaningful conversation.

Discussion leads to outburst of truth

More and more healthy discussions are conducted, more and more close couples get to each other. Discussion will give a vague idea about compatibility of personality traits. A good discussion will always help couples to identify each other's belief systems, core values, thoughts, personality, habits etc. Need is just to let oneself free and not hold back in any manner. Even slightest amount of restrain if held then the other person will be unable to completely read the personality. If couples desire to know each other well and let the other person know how they actually feel and think about them then they should let themselves free and have an open conversation. If discussions are healthy where aim is to resolve issues and make relationships grow stronger, only then it will lead to outburst of truth. This way couples will come to know each other's true feelings and the innermost desires which their partners conceal within the corners of their heart will get revealed.

Healthy discussions increase potential for love

Whenever there is an issue, it should be resolved immediately by a healthy discussion. There should not be any hesitation and issue resolving session should not be postponed. When partners come together to work on a negative event, they find a solution to it i.e., their focus shifts from negative event to positives of the relationship. This is because seeking a solution always means finding a silver lining in dark clouds. Negative events are therefore forgotten very well. In this way a lot of trust and compassion builds up between partners. They start realizing that their other half is always present to hold their hand and help them in times of need. Negative event can very well be used to build more and more trust and resolve the issues. This will develop a loving relationship which will deepen with time and bring the best out of both the partners. On the other hand, couples who do not discuss and share with each other, always maintain a distance. They remain thoughtless, mean and stressed. They themselves solve the issues and do not depend on each other. They feel that they have solved the issue, but the issue however remains unsolved. This is because if issue is related to relationship then it needs to be solved by both the partners involved in that relationship.

What do discussions indicate?

  • Relationships are considered to be good only when couples tend to develop a habit of sharing everything with each other and having healthy debates on daily basis. If there are no discussions then there will exist no love. Power of survival is what discussions indicate mainly. Those who can speak out their heart can do so very easily as they develop lots of courage within them and courage is a key to survival. If couples can develop this courage of speaking out loud about what is lingering in their minds then even the most evil incidents cannot tear the relationship apart. They are meant to live together forever.

  • Discussions indicate that couples respect each other's views. Though views and opinions may be entirely different, but if couples are having discussions and not arguments then this indicates that they respect each other. When arguments take place between couples then they fight for themselves and rarely pay respect to other person's opinion. If couples desire for long and healthy commitments then they should communicate. Discussions usually broaden horizon and couples start understanding each other more nicely. If couples regularly are having open conversations then it also indicates that both the partners stand by their opinions. Being in a relationship does not mean they need to give up their identity and change their opinions and views. It also means that there is so much scope for learning. If partners broaden their horizon, they can learn so much from each other.

  • Discussions indicate comfort. Couples who tend to have healthy discussions are very cozy and comfortable with each other. There is no scope of communication where discomfort is sensed. Couples who are pretty sure that they can speak up anything and everything in front of their partners and this is no way going to affect their relationship mean that they are comfortable. This is the reasons that they push the boundaries as they know splitting up or breaking up is never going to happen to them. Moreover, healthy debates also indicate that relationship is not boring. There is so much to talk and so much to exchange which will always keep relationship lively.


Regular healthy discussions or debates, kindle the passion in a relationship. It indicates that couples are not afraid of each other. They can have open communication which keeps their relationship lively. They get to learn so much from each other. They respect each other's opinions and despite of having strong views and opinions, both of them are very comfortable with each other and share each and everything with each other. Discussions indicate that there is immense love, passion and the bond between couples is so strong that despite of being two different personalities, their open minded nature never makes them to question their relationship and that is why their love grows stronger day by day.

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Author: Reena Upadhya09 Oct 2017 Member Level: Diamond   Points : 3

Discussions also very well indicate that couples are not afraid of each other. Despite differences, if couples stand by each other, it also means that they are not afraid of speaking out loud which is an amazing quality. It indicates that both of them are strong personalities and can handle equally strong views of their partners and still their love flourishes. They can very well keep up with each other and this signifies that they are well-suited and well-tested for each other. In other words, they are meant for each other.

Author: Natarajan10 Oct 2017 Member Level: Gold   Points : 5

The truth of married life in many ways is talking, talking and talking so that we understand each other better and strengthen the relationships. This talking should be a two-way traffic. Most often marriages are on the rocks or fall apart due to misunderstanding, arguments, and miscommunication or in some cases no communication at all.

If the common arguments are replaced by discussions, it sounds more pleasant and the outcome is also smoother.
Once two people in a relationship or marriage understand that both are equal with their own personalities and thought process, then the discussion becomes more productive and meaningful.

If both can discuss issues that affect each other, their immediate families, their finances then the marriage starts to move forward steadily. Further on discussions regarding their ambitions, career plans, dreams to be fulfilled adds more depth, understanding, and value to the relationship. When these are taken care, automatically love, knowledge and openness follow.

A couple or two people in a relationship that achieves this need not worry about who's the head of the family, who works, who cooks, who spends, who stays where and all the other silly things that often leads to fights.

I think we should go one step forward and have regular discussion with our parents and immediate families on both sides so that none feels neglected or let down because their son or daughter got married off.

Author: DR.N.V. Srinivasa Rao11 Oct 2017 Member Level: Platinum   Points : 5

discussions improve relations. Arguments create misunderstandings. If there is a difference of opinion it is always better to have an open discussion and understand the other party's point of view. First, learn to listen to others first. If your partner wants to say something if you pay attention and properly hear, the problem will get 50% solved. Even though your point is different you can explain in a very polite and logical way, the other side will also understand the actual matter. There is a saying sound will come when two hands come together. Sometimes when our partner's mood is off, even though he/she is wrong, don't say on the face. Give some cooling time and then explain where the fault in the thought process. Never bring the ego factor into discussions. If these matters are kept in mind, relationships with wife, parents, relatives, family members and friends, will be always healthy only. A very nice article by the author giving his insights on the matter of relations and discussions and their effects.

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