Introduction Imagine a world where people always share their resources. Where there is no excess greed whatsoever. Where the rich have more empathy than what they have now. Or imagine very common people, who are kind and walk the talk. Where one can be trusted to act only in ways that they outwardly do when they present themselves. Five of such major instances, where we could go horribly wrong in our assessment of people, based on all wrong assumptions or understanding of some crooks in the society are a) Matters regarding the marriage of any kind b) Letting out our houses on rent c) Having friends with whom we share rooms d) Decisions to lend money to people and e) Trusting people in confidential mattes.
Matters regarding marriageThis is one major instance where we make blunders. When the parents come calling after the matching of horoscopes, we are taken away by whatever they talk. Be the parents of the boy or the girl, it should be noted that they might hide some aspect of the boy or girl since that might be some physical deformity itself. For example, in one particular case, the parents of the girl did make inquiries about the boy but overlooked the point that he wore very thick glasses. He had a business of his own, but his father was taking care of the business to the extent of ninety percent of the total business operation. Even this was overlooked. References gave a good opinion about the boy. The engagement function was also over. As is now the existing practice, the girl insisted that the boy take her out for shopping. The driver stopped the car and when the boy took out his spectacles to wipe it, the girl asked him to read the board of the big retail shop nearby with his naked eyes. The boy could not do so. Quick inquiries about his personal life revealed that he had a dangerous version of glaucoma. His parents did not mention this at all at any stage. The girl took a bold decision and terminated the wedding. The girl was feeling cheated and rightly so. It was a case of a narrow miss. She pointed out that even if they had made a very honest declaration even during the initial discussions, she would have married him, as there was advanced treatment now available to keep glaucoma under check. The family was also very rich. They could even perform the operation in the USA. The girl's very rich parents felt miserable too.
The lesson is simple. In such vital matters, make all inquiries. Never take any decision and do not hesitate to call off the marriage, if you find out that the problem is from the other side.
Letting out our houses on rent This is another very common mistake. We believe the broker, little realizing that the broker is only after money. The party could be a very dangerous party, after all. There are several instances when the people have made matters miserable by refusing to vacate the house even when asked to. It is always wise to stick to certain norms. If the people are good, and you are assured of rent anyway, settle for a lesser rent, if the people are otherwise good.
Having friends with whom we share rooms Even from the most prestigious colleges of India, we find guys who are high on drugs or booze or whatever. Yet, when we live as married bachelors in cities such as Mumbai or New Delhi, we need several reality checks and also good references before we decide to share houses or rooms with someone. We should get very good references. It is wise to have the roommates from the same office or organization. This will minimize all trouble later.
Decisions to lend money to people We often believe all sob stories. We trust people. There are instances when young boys have been cheated by cunning people. Some crook among women decides to con young bachelors or married men. They first become friends on Facebook and then call the men up and seek financial favors. In one particular case, the men realized that they gave money to the same women, even when being friends on Facebook. They worked in the same organization. They gave a police complaint and the lady was arrested. It later turned out that all her sob stories were false and he had cheated many other men. Yes, such women or even men are rare. Yet, it is quite true that this tribe is always increasing as well. We should note this very important point and take a call, only after we are convinced that the suffering is genuine and that our money will come back.
Trusting people in confidential mattes This is another area of concern. We trust people and share all the confidential information. This is very dangerous and can even lead to suicides of sensitive family members. Every family matter is always confidential. These things should never be shared with others. For example, when some men face tough situations at home from their wives, or because of their wives, they ventilate that to someone, trusting that single person. Every human being has a weakness. That particular person could have made a temporary mistake of sharing the same with a third person. The message becomes something discussed in the public domain. With disastrous consequences. It could lead to divorces too. Already, divorce is so common in the cities. It is very important that we are very careful about these matters, more so, those that are very confidential. It is fine that we keep it only within our heart. We need not even share that with our aged parents, who would only feel helpless.
Life often teaches us many lessons. Based on a huge number of real-life experiences, some important points have been highlighted above. We should be very careful in each of the aforesaid cases.
This is a good article explaining the points where there are chances for an individual to go wrong in making a decision. Some people think that people who are all talking politely are good and they will try to be good with them and they will make friends with them. But their real intentions are different and they may not be able to assess them properly. Especially, in many organisations, we may find many people like that. They appear like goats but they are tigers. By any chance, if you comment anything about a senior colleague he will definitely carry your words there. So we should not talk loosely with such people. It is better not to befriend them. They are selfish people and they will try to use the information they got for their advantage. So we should be careful in making friends and we should not believe anybody blindly.
Another important matter is marriage. Marriage is a combined journey of two persons together. Just by seeing or getting attracted by the appearance one should not decide about the life partner. Any wrong step in this issue will make life miserable. So a proper understanding and enquiring about the family of the other side and getting as many details as possible is very important. A step made in a hurry can become very bad in the coming times. So before fixing the match, one should have the complete details of the other side and think better and take the decision.